I'm still smiling at this memory. I was washing my hands in a public toilet when an old man went in one of the cubicles. About 10 seconds later there's this exclamation, so i turn around and notice what is going on. High pressured water is squirting everywhere: under the door, on the walls, on the ceiling (imagine a firman with an out of control hose) and all you can hear is this grunting noise, until finally it stops. Then the old bloke steps out - he's completely soaked from head to toe. The look on his face, a mixture of confusion, utter bewilderment and horror. I know it's cruel but i couldn't help laughing - his expresion was just so funny.
Anyway, I'd remembered that I'd accidentally left some photos from one of my corrupted photo cards in Kuching on the hard drive of a cyber cafe. I could just go straight from Semporna to KL, but I decide to fly from Tawau to KK to Kuching to KL - a day and a half of travelling and a cost I could do with avoiding. All in the hope of retrieving the files.
I spend most of one day at an airport, and when i finally arrive at Kuching i discover that they have just started celebrating a month long festival for national day. My first 5 hotels are fully booked atnd it's 9:30 at night. I got a room...eventually.
As for the photos - the cyber cafe had moved and upgraded all of its computers. :(
Time to Kill
11:45 My plane arrives from Tawau. It's on time for once.
12:15 My bag arrives from Tawau. It's last, not for once.
12:30 I have 7 more hours before my connecting flight, I know there's no left luggage but can i leave my bag with you I ask the information girl. The information girl is very informative, but not very helpful. No, there's no left luggage at KK airport and no you can't leave your bag she says. She suggests I go to security.
12:45 I eventually find security. I have 7 more hours before my connecting flight, I know there's no left luggage but can i leave my bag with you I ask the security girl. The security girl is very mean, and not very helpful. No, there's no left luggage at KK airport and no you can't leave your bag and don't you know you're in a restricted zone she admonishes. She suggests I go to security.
12:51 I swear...lots
12:52 I swear...lots more
12:53 I decide i have to stay at the airport. I swear...lots, lots more
12:55 I've walked all around the airport - i can have lunch at KFC, the Dried and Frozen Seafood Shop, or the Asian Delights Cafe. I try the latter as I'm far too dejected to walk all the way around the airport again.
13:00 I order a chicken curry
13:10 I'm told they don't have any chicken curry, but here's a free coke. thanks, I don't drink coke I don't say. I drink beer but i decide it's too early - I order cake and coffee instead.
13:30 My bill arrives, I have a heart attack, decide to drink the 'free' coke and suddenly find i need the toilet
14:00 I decide i can't stay on the toilet forever - at least 2 people saw me come in here. i don't look that conspicuous with a huge rucksack on my back, a pair of scuba fins strapped to the side of it, and another backpack on my front.
14:10 I find an empty seat, start to read Arabian Nights, decide i would have killed Sheherazade after the first night as her stories bore me and start to people watch instead. It should pass a few minutes.
16:10 I can't stop watching the guy in front of me. He's trying to sell a credit card to the unsuspecting, poor folk in the airport. He's typical Malaysian: not too tall, glasses, short-back-and-sides haircut and he takes his job very seriously. His technique involves running in an 'effeminate', 'gay' manner (sorry) to his victim, invading their personal space, ignoring their NO and talk to the hand gesture and repeatedly asking them the same question, but rephrasing it each time. Then he runs back to his desk in an effeminate, gay manner once they reach departures. I expect he causes more nervous breakdowns than the food bills. Those that say yes do so because they have been bullied and scared. It's fascinating.
16:15 I decide i won't eat for the next week and go for a cup of tea - it should be safe. Besides I think the creepy credit card guy has noticed i keep looking at him. I'm not sure which is worse; that he may hit on me or try and sell me a credit card.
16:16 I pick a seat where i can watch the credit card kid from above. It seems he's able to push out both his bum and his belly in equal measure when he runs.
16:40 I suddenly find i need the toilet.
17:05 I decide i can't stay on the toilet forever - i was careful this time, no one saw me enter.
17:10 My flight has just opened for check-in: Yes, just the one bag and the scuba fins i say. Yes I do use them to go diving with. What's that, Malaysia has some great diving locations - no, really and your uncle owns a dive shop in KK and I can have his business card - wow, thanks.
17:20 I make my way to departures - less than 2 hours to kill. Time to go to the toilet - damn, credit card boy is looking at me....
