Here in Thailand everything is an adventure for little Marlene on her great tour.
It starts with getting up and wanting to go to the toilet. The first and most important action in the morning. Get up, find your way to the toilet, sit down comfortably, take your time to do what you wanna do and then grap some toilet paper and you're done. Pretty simple, one should think. Not worth wasting a single thought on it. At least in good old Europe. In Thailand, things are a bit different.
To start with, instead of a seat, there is a hole in the ground, much like the toilets you find in Italy. As an Italian, I should be used to such kind of stuff. I do acknowledge that such toilets are more hygenic, more eco-friendly and less expensive. Having said that, I have not quite gotten used to this new style of relieving yourself. Style, that's what it is all about, I guess. And have a weird sensation I might still lack some style while akwardly climing onto such a slippery toilet in my flip-flops.
But I have made it. When I finally manage to get in a crouching position, the real challenge begins: hitting the hole, if you know what I mean. As Asian people are not as tall as European people are, the proportions are not the same and it might not always work out fine.
Next thing are the mosquitos. In most toilets it is dark and humid, which is an ideal environment for these little beasts. And of course, the very moment I expose my bright white posterior to them, they start attacking it. Not too difficult for them, as there is certainly no lack of surface...
However, the real challenge of the whole toilet adventure is the last part: cleaning things up. And I have to admit, I have not quite found the solution to this as there is simply no toilet paper. Instead, there is some water and a small bucket with a handle. I know I have to combine the two in a constructive way but I simply could not figure out how not to get all wet. Finding that out will be my next challenge.
Yes, I feel very European. And I feel very adventurous, too. :-)
