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Long route home Our trip all the way home, trying to catch no planes and stay on the ground like civilised people. It's taking us via India all the way to Europe from Japan, the furthest of the Far East...

Bed and bored

VIETNAM | Wednesday, 11 August 2010 | Views [675] | Comments [1]

Coming up to the end of South East Asia and the closing of a chapter in our trip we've decided to do some special updates comparing things and talk about the trip itself rather than a simple account of how we spend our lives...this first one takes the theme of accomodation and food.

Food glorious food indeed! We have feasted on all kinds of things, most of them delectable, so far and have the unbridled joys of India around the corner. It should come as no surprise that rice has been the constant staple with the occasional noodle to liven things up. Frying and boiling have been the most usual style of cooking. In Japan the national dishes are sushi and sashimi, but less well known to foreigners are things like okonomiyaki (a kind of pancake with cabbage and many other things indeed), nabe hotpots or onigiri which are small rice triangles. Of course the confectionary was bonkers and very very good. Into China briefly for hotpot and sizzling szechuen dishes with tongue-tingling chillis as well as sumptuous peking duck, of course. In Honkers we had a Michelin starred dim sum meal that cost just £8 for both of us. Vietnam saw a deluge of pho - thin noodles in soup, and more spring rolls than we could shake a stick of rock at, fried or fresh we gobbled them all up and asked for more. In Central Vietnam we got to roll up little pancakes with fresh herbs and meat. Possibly best of all was the vache q'ui vie and baguettes available everywhere that often served as a packed lunch for us. Cambodia saw insects and a marvellous fry-up arrive on our tables, seperately of course. Kampot pepper spiced many a meal and when it didn't, marijuana was often a replacement. Thailand was a blizzard of foreign tastes but we battled through to find delicious salads from the Northeast and gallons of curry soup. The limes were superb. Malaysia had by far and away the best food since Japan - Indian curries, Malayan grilled fish and nasi lemak and Chinese fried noodles. The satay was pretty average - the authentic taste seeming to be honeyed - but almost everything else was mindblowingly good - especially in Georgetown.

Vegetarianism has really only raised it's ugly head spasmodically, most places have been meat or fish based. Quality of that meat has been largely poor outside of Japan which is why everything has been strongly flavoured. Herbs have been very fresh, abundant and extremely flavourful. Highlights include the coriander and basil throughout Vietnam, the kaffir limes of Thailand and Kampot pepper. The food has been edging more and more towards Indian, the tipping point being Cambodia, where curries started appearing. Western food has been widely available and not generally very good, a legacy sometimes of colonial times but more often of mass tourism. Possibly a bigger blight is the bastardisation of local food to suit percieved western tastes which is the worst of all worlds. Banana pancakes are really a scar on the once-pretty face of much of the region. Cambodia had the best western food. Prices haven't been high but rarely have they been that low. The days when one could feast for a pound are well and truly over, the tourist divide has been set up. Malaysia and Vietnam were the exceptions to that - places where one could eat well very cheaply and with local people rather than b***packers

Drinks have been hit and miss. Japanese lager is better than most European brews, bettered only by the sake and whisky lists longer than Oli's ponytail. Most of the other regional brews are pretty poor though. An honourable mention for Vietnam's Bia Hoi, which is draught and very good when it's not watered. Coffee has ranged from the highs of pure rocket fuel in Vietnam, where the fields of coffee are scant kilometres away, to crappy nescafe shoved at us without a care. Milk has invariably been condensed and sometimes sugar added too. Tea has been largely woeful up until Malaysia where it finally came black and with milk. Water has been largely undrinkable since Japan. Fresh coconut has been a good alternative to plastic bottles - it's served as is with a hole poked in it for your straw.

As for our nights, we've slept on two ferries, a junk, a bus and some trains. We've slept in a jungle hide, a beach hut and a cave with a bear. It's fair to say it's been varied. Sleeping on trains is a funny thing but not too bad. The ferry from Japan was pretty swish, all things told and ships are a wonderful place to be at night. We've searched for places with character above places with facilities and it's worked out well. The Atlanta and the Colosseum gave us faded grandeur in different levels of upkeep, various newer places had staff so lovely we added them as friends on facebook. Most places have been pretty cheery, in Vietnam they have a funny system of having to wake the staff up to get back in and we managed to lock ourselves out in Kampot because we couldn't use the sliding door! Japan was a blur of identikit business hotels that we had a member's card for, and our Peking place was swisher that it should've been.

And now...the awards for bed and for board...

Best Restaurant Roof - Saigon BBQ with it's retractable roof to avoid rain

Best restaurant not on dry land - Cat Ba floating restaurant

Best deaf/mute place - Hue's original Thanh restaurant

Most live crocodiles in a restaurant - Snooky's Snake House

Number one 'bad for kids' sweet - squeezy choco paste in Malaysia

Best feast for 1 (one) pound - Woodland's in Georgetown, though local

Most grumpily entertaining chef - Mr Okonomiyaki in Hiroshima

Slowest service - A+W in KL (a Halal fast food joint) with Kuala Tahan's floating restaurant a close second

Stupidest overordering by us - Nanning's food street, we left more than half the meal

Biggest waste of good chicken - Nagoya

Biggest FAIL of a western dish - thickened double cream carbonara on Perhentien islands

Least edible food - Chinese trains' offerings

Most authentic English food - Magic Sponge's fry-up, closely followed by the roast next door

Most imaginative pricing scheme - Xuan in Ninh Binh, plate equals outlay of cash

Least available local food - Pattaya where, incredibly, they had North European food instead!

Biggest burger - Pattaya's 90lb monster

Longest list of possibly endangered meat - Nha Trang local cafe

Biggest 'why did I order it' moment - everytime we ordered Catfish and picked through a seemingly neverending skeleton

Most otters in a guesthouse complex - Mira beach

Most cheerily homophobic buddhist owner - MR J, Ko Tao

Most dubious claims by an owner - Mr J again for his homemade condoms and Royal proclamations

Most bears in a hotel room - Crazy house, Da Lat

Most baths in a room - Xuan, Ninh Binh

Most cheery threats to eat dogs - Xuan again

Closest shack to the beach - Snookyville, right on the beach

Most rat-infested hellhole - Also snookyville

Least finished building - Crazy House

Most improbably sized room - Hong Kong, just a foot bigger than a double bed across, and a double bed long

Most different names for one guesthouse - Also Hong Kong, these guys were cowboys

Most socially responsible guesthouse - Jasmine Lodge, Siem Reap

Most absurd idea for a bed - the bus to Hue, like a living hell

Nicest baths - Beppu's ryokan, our last in Japan

Most surprisingly comfortable bed - the night ferry from Ko Tao

Most home-like place to stay - Magic Sponge

Most friendly owners - Magic Sponge

Most likely to invite people out for drinks - Magic Sponge

Best double act - Red Inn, Georgetown, boozing, pontificating owners

Most stentorian warnings - Atlanta hotel, Bangkok

Comments

1

This is an excellent blog -thanks for posting it and bringing to the fore many a happy memory of curry for breakfast and huge bowls of stupendiously spicy rice !

Ta also for the image of a spasmodically rising Vegetarian head, but maybe that's a personal smile raiser...

Finally, please elaborate on 'Most bears in a hotel room - Crazy house, Da Lat' - were they real or toy bears? And did they take good care of you/

  dAVE Aug 23, 2010 2:05 AM

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