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Conversations on the Road II

AUSTRALIA | Monday, 21 April 2008 | Views [1023] | Comments [4]

(From Darwin to Katherine in the Ambassador Van – otherwise entitled ‘How prolonged hours of enforced family time makes the mind melt like molten mucus’)

New Product Ideas

Tiffany with slightly crazed laughter, (after one of Jett’s moments of early detox madness), – ‘Kid repellent – spray on!’

What ifs

(started by Jett who is (honestly) concerned about EVERYTHING going WRONG)

Jett – What if you woke up and I wasn’t in my bed and not any where and then you found out I was at Nana’s?’

Tiffany – ‘What if I just give you a bit of a slap?’ (toothy grin)

Jett - ‘What if cookies could decide who was going to eat them?’

Jett – ‘What if I turned into an eagle, right now?’

After not getting the response he was after, Jett, then very seriously gave this advice to Albert ‘Don’t scream or be surprised. Just act normal, ‘cause if you don’t, then you’ll loose control of the car and kill us all.’

Tiffany – ‘He’ll kill himself, me and an eagle.’

Jett – What would you do if we all had superpowers?

Tiffany – What super powers?

Jett – I could make people dizzy, and make stuff happen with my mind. You could fly 10 000 feet up, run faster than lightening and look into the future. Albert could sneeze so much that people pooshhhoooahhh, and he could be invisible.’

Albert – I would go into the girl’s dress room and try to hold my sneeze.

Jett – If Albert gets eaten by a crocodile, shall we eat first or go to the police?

Tiffany – I don’t know. What would you do?

Jett – I’d like to eat, ‘cause we should eat up all the food. But I would cry so much if you both got eaten by a crocodile. But then I would come back to the van and eat up all the good things and then call the ranger.

Jett’s questions of the day

‘Is two billion seconds more, or less, than one day?’

Tiffany – ‘More.’

Jett – ‘Is one billion seconds more or less than one day?

Jett’s comment of the day (after being on the road for 6 days, and listening to me say NO again to his request for an ice cream)

‘Why are you dragging me around the world, when I don’t even want to?’

(Don’t worry concerned and soft hearted people of the journal reading variety, we dealt with him in the traditional Buddhist method of enlightenment by the ‘hitzemhard’ school – we knocked his head with a short stick and said ‘oh please, why don’t you think about all the poor North American kids. They are told there is only one country worth visiting. Would you rather be poor and starved of culture like them, huh?’ (Wow, its late when I write this, and I guess I’m being a bit of a Borat and offending as many people as I can for a cheap laugh. Sorry about that. Its ALLLLL a BIG joke, apart from what Jett said.)

Albert’s Musical Moments

Albert turned on the Ipod, and chose, of all songs, Roxette’s ‘Hello, you fool, I love you.’ Unfortunately for me, Roxette is not one of my favourite bands. Can you imagine my horror, when Albert sung the lyrics word for word, and before I knew what was happening, I involuntarily learnt what the Swedish singer is crooning so melodiously during the chorus. Do you want to know what it is? ‘Come and join the joy ride.’ And, painfully, the last time it repeats this pretty phrase, it says (Albert tells me happily) ‘Be a joy ride’. At the time of writing, Albert is saying ‘What’s wrong with that?’ I just sigh. He also informs me that the title of the popular ditty, is ‘joy ride’. I say, with my best teen valley accent ‘what ever.’

‘I don’t like the pussy songs, I just like the rock ones’ – this is an HONEST quote from him today, the 17th of April 2008. (Albert is suppose to be a metal head)

Metallica moments

Albert, when not singing lyrics, also vocalises the lead guitar, and enjoys impersonating the drums when the previous two are not available. When the song ends, and there is a moment’s pause in the noise coming from the stereo and Albert’s mouth or his beating of the steering wheel, he then likes to talk about the song that we were just subject to, or the one looming up. I cherish these moments of Albert’s enjoyment.

Tags: albert, allwelcome, ambassador van, humour, jett, on the road, t a j



hi, jettt and i watched birds, probably pelicans, circling high in the sky, riding the air currents, we talked about how good that would be. might be where he got the idea from. love mum

  mum Apr 21, 2008 2:11 PM


This is soooooooooo funny. I really cracked up at the eagle comment - fabulous. I've read all your posts and have decided that you are one of my favourite writers. You are seriously talented!!!!!! It's super easy to read and really interesting. I am so proud of you. I am sooo proud - proud proud proud.
Espern meeting soon.......

  Katrine Apr 23, 2008 3:18 AM


Haha some great quotes you got here. I like the picture as well. I got a simular one of my finger on top of the empire state building. Keep up the good conversations and keep those quotes coming ;)

BTW: I'm doing my 1 week home exam now, and the sun is shining sooo bright outside. I wanna go out and play! Please pray for me so that I will get a brilliant idea and finish my paper within the hour.

  Vidar Apr 25, 2008 7:46 AM


Thank you Katrine!! :) I take it as a compliment since I know your BIG favourite is BILL.
Vidar, where do you think I got the idea for the photo from? Your finger idea has been a great inspiration!
Prays being sent!alas, a bit late....
hugs to both.

  allwelcome Apr 26, 2008 5:15 PM

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