Woke up yesterday feeling a bit down.. You'd figure being in Thailand, and teaching English would be fun, but if I'm honest, I'm finding it hard. My mind seems to go blank and my barriers seem to go up.
Yesterday was really hard, i find I'm falling asleep in my head and nothing is going in. I'm being loaded up with loads of information, and everyone else in my class is asking questions, getting involoved and there's me.. day dreaming, streching, clock watching.. I'm worrying nothing is going in.. I just want to see a class for myself instead of all the paper work attached..
We had a grammar test. I freeeeeked out. Actually wasn't too bad- didn't get a perfect score, but its highlighted parts that I need to look over. At the end of class we were told we have to find an adult that wants free English lessons and approach them. How? I'm thinking, I find it awkward enough as it is just trying to buy water in the 7 eleven! After hearing that news i panic, and drive home, cursing under my breath "What have I got myself into.." I get back, shower and decided to head back to the school to meet up with the others to head to this Thai BBQ. I'm glad I went even though i felt I just sat there not knowing how to get involoved in the convos. When I get to the school, I'm early and sit outside waiting for the others to come. They've arranged a tuk-tuk that isn't anything like the ones I've seen in India.. They're side cars attached, with booming music and neon flashing lights.. quite amusing actually. I decided to drive in the scooter, thinking it wasn't that much of a drive... We set off in convoy and its a far way, but it was funny cos everyone was freeking out that I was going to crash or someone was going to crash into me. As no-one else drives cos they're all too worried about having an accident, which is fair enough, but I like that thrill and I have driven scooters before. When we get to the BBQ its set up under little canopes with a service area, where you go up, get your plates and choose what meats you want, sides and sauces and herbs etc... Get back to the table, and they've set up small pans kinda that you put your meat/fish onto and you cook it all yourself.. Around the edges there is boiling water poured in where you cook your noodles and veggies.. Its very odd, but enjoyable. Afer I fill myself up to the point of popping its time to head home before I fall asleep.. The drive back was fine, and I get into bed and konk out..
I tried getting up again to head to the beach, but no.. too tiered, its starting to become the story of my life. I may just leave it to next week, I'm still adjusting and I need the sleep.. I fill up, again!!! I only filled up on monday, this scooter is eating gas.. Yeh its cheap, but its irritating me.. Got to stop that and just "Go with the flow" as they like to say here. I'm getting this really bad habit of racing people on the scooter, its super addictive and I think the Thai men hate that a farang is over taking them all the time.. Arriving at school we get into our presentations about a passion that we have. I should of brought my Diana camera I think as I pull out my diablo and give everyone a quick lesson on how to use it. People seemed to like it and it was definately something different- Yoga, photography, hunting.. It felt better for myself as I had something to show, and I'm hoping that earnt me some brownie points with the teachers as I've been quite withdrawn recently. I just don't want them to think that I don't want to be there.
Unfortuantely I still became bored and tiered quite quickly and start thinking about lunch. Today we heading to the fishing town just down the road. I have chilli chicken with egg.. Its real yum and to my surprise its not too hot and apparently she good it local and not to the taste of a farang...
One of the girls and myself decided we still have 30mins and we need coffee.. *Kate usually drives and I was expecting her to drive too.. but she says she'll jump on the back of me! UH OH, I've never driven a passenger before.. I was nervous, but the min she got on it wasn't too bad I kinda give myself a pat on the back for trying something new... and taking that chance. Its only as a few years ago when I was travelling India with an ex I attempted to drive him, and we crashed and that has always played on my mind. Anyway, we get to tesco lotus and I'm walking around in a daze, so much to look at, so cheap! haha.. We find iced coffee and buy some sort of Thai sweet and decided we'll get 1 for everybody. Right, we're gona be late if we don't leave soon, so we head to check out. I get the chocolate that one of the other girls asked, hand over 100B and get given 2 tiny coins back.. I think to myself, hang on I gave you 100B this isn't right.. We point out the mistake to the casier and he gets quite embaressed. Jabbering in Thai he closes the till and gets another girl over to cash the till- we're late, defiantely! Crap! After about 10 mins I get even the correct change and we all exchange a wai (maybe too many times in mine and *Kates corner) and the girls start giggling. They're probably thinking "daft farang's!" You've gotta remember here in Thailand they want to save face, so to point out an error did make me feel bad.. But I think we made up for it with too many Wai's!
Getting back into class everyone is way ahead and I notice we're suppost to be finishing off our flashcards, which I haven't finished. Manage to get it done, and do the presentation and to my surprise we pull it off and I wasn't as nervous as previous occasions where I've gotten up in front of class and crapped myself. When we start wrappping up we're told we have, ontop of a 500word essay and revision for a grammar test, that we have to pick an age group (mines kindy, which I'm thrilled over as I want to teach that age group) and choose a topic, make flash cards, and a game relating to it. AAARRRRGHH! My mind is boggled with this info and I have another mini freek out that I've taken too much on, not come prepaird and I'm getting myself into a bigger mess.. Yep! I want to go home, and forget about it.
Honestly, I've got to stop racing people on the drive home.
I get back to the hostel and look over websites for the homework- Actually this may not be too bad. With some ideas I decided to see if there are any local stationary places about where I can buy some card etc from. I come down stairs and "the gang", Lek, Steve and the guy that serves me brekkie, plus Gina (steve & lek's daughter) are sitting around an old sign, peeling back to old pictures that used to be on it, as they want to do a new one. I sit down to ask Steve if there are any places about- I get told there is, just down the road- WIIIINING! I couldn't help myself and I find i'm sitting amoungst them picking at the plastic which turns out to be very addictive. When I manage to pull myself away I go over the road, and find this store. HEAVEN. WOW! SO MUCH CHOICE.. I'm there for 30mins, cos I come out and its dark.. Its a little gold mine- stamps, card, felt, create paper and even Thai and English work books for kids that would be great for inspiration and also a little help for me with my basic Thai alphabet.. When I got some more money I'll go back. When I get back into the room I get so into it that I find myself enjoying it, not worrying that its wrong. I make a spinning game where the topic is animals and print off pictures and get a little spinner for the middle.. EVen though there is still a bit to do, I am chuffed! I walk out to show Steve and he's telling me to go downstairs to where the kids are (the age my project is on) and show them.. When I come down they get told to listen cos "I'm a teacher!". I show them, and they all come round and start spinning the wheel, it does brake a little, but they were so keen and it made me so happy- and they were getting it right and listening. I try to remember some of the tricks we were told about- not to tell them what to do, but guess.. drill and repeat. So yeh, I'm pretty pleased with myeslf. I should actually go back upstairs and finish it off as I think I should draw out my flash cards, but I reallllly don't want to, I'm tempted to print them off tomorrow in class....? I'm hoping that the last few days were just me still adjusting.....
