We must go.... ...live to feed the hungry, stand beside the broken.

Well, today we left New Orleans (YAY!) and made our way to Pensacola. We stopped at Lambert's and ate with Bill Kisner (our assigned National Staff person). DELICIOUS! i ate WAAAAAY too much! Also, our 4th team member came back to us today after spending a few days at home for her sister's/cousin's graduation! So...we are whole again. Wonderful! So......I am glad to be out of New Orleans....number one: because of the insane humidity there. Number two: because of the mean people there....number three: because of the filth there. This hotel (Hampton Inn) is so crazy awesome! I have never stayed in a nicer hotel in my life. Shoot. So....i was writing the other day about the strangeness of being on the "other side" of all of the World Changers madness. We spent a couple of nights at the New Orleans project worship services and, to see the participants and know that I am no longer one of them, i am now authority weirded me out! It's awesome...but, for seven years, that has not been the case. Here's what i wrote: For the first time in seven years, during my involvement with World Changers, I am in charge. I am backstage (or on stage, rather). I am no longer the student third row from the front in the woodwind section. I am the conductor on the pedestal for all to observe, judge, and follow. I have never been on the other side of this particular operation and I am not quite sure how I am supposed to go about it all. I know I am to display the love of Christ to my fullest potential. Become all things to all people. Preach, teach, and disciple for as much as a week will allow. Usher people into the throneroom if they, for some reason, have not already been there all day and all their lives. I am leader. What does that even mean? Does it really mean anything? It must to some degree, I suppose the title holds some weight of importance. But we are all worshippers. I am as they are. It is not an I and them matter. Nor should anything be. Us and them. Ugly. But, as Scripture says, we are appointed to certain positions because that is where our most developed gifts lie (most of the time). Music leaders have been placed their because they are skilled in that arena. Pastors are positioned as pastors because of their leadership abilities and willingness to serve the body. Etc. So, I suppose, that would explain the weight of that word “leader.” By wearing a gray t-shirt and a name badge displaying a specific arrangement of the letters S, T, A and F, I become authority. I become the conductor because of the color of my clothing and the authenticity of a composition of four letters plastered on a laminated “official” badge hanging on a blue ribbon lanyard displayed legitimately around my neck. But maybe not. Initially, to the students and other participants, yes. But in reality, in REAL LIFE, no. Those things make not a leader of me. They make me part of a mold, an idea, an ideal. However, the gifts so graciously bestowed on my by God are what make me a leader in the musical arena. It is only the grace of God which gives legitimacy. I’m ok with that. I’m ok because I believe that I have been placed here because it is my skill. It is my gift and it is the Lord’s leading. I have been positioned on the other side because of Christ. The seven years spent as a participant paved the way. I am here. I am ready. Here am I, Lord. Send me. well, that's a lot so i'm gonna just end with that!!!!! I'll be updating more often now that my internet isn't acting up! yay! God bless you all. OH!!! also, please be praying for Stephen (my boyfriend). He left for Russia this afternoon on a solo 2 month stay to teach English at an orphanage. Pray for strength and comfort. Thank you.