Midterms basically suck for me. I'm stuck in a classroom having mini-conversations with nearly 40 students for an hour and a half. They get to leave after two minutes, but I'm there the entire time trying to deal with the bull shit they're trying to say in English.
Occasionally, I have to stop myself from correcting them. Or arguing with them. Or laughing out loud.
The most entertaining ones are the ones who don't understand. I have questions written out for them. I just point to it and read it out loud and they then read it silently, think for a minute, and answer.
If they don't understand, almost assuredly, they are going to talk about something else. Usually these topics are mildly related. Or somewhat decent. But today, Sam had other things on his mind.
"Teacher, you look very beautiful today, my teacher."
"Thanks, Sam. Tell me about your worst holiday."
"I like hip hop music. I like to go to clubs. Drunk. My friends say, 'drunk.' When I am drunk, I cannot think, my head hurts, I cannot eat. But no more whiskey, no more beer, no more smoking. I like English. I like hip hop music. I want to go abroad. I am do my best. That's all."
Huh?
I just stared at him and then asked him to send the next person in.
In the 30 seconds or so before Kevin came in, I chuckled a little, considered calling Mario, and then had to get myself together. I almost changed Kevin's midterm to, "Does Sam have a drinking problem?"
Or better, "Is Sam drunk?"
