It has been a busy month. I am working on my organizational / community diagnostic which I have to present early next month. I am already nervous just thinking about it. The report / presentation has to be in Spanish, to my fellow volunteers. It will be a week long training session somewhere in the capitol, and I am crossing my fingers for some hot water in the showers. I haven’t taken a hot water shower since I left Miami. I don’t even remember what that feels like. Cold showers are more painful than cold bucket baths. I don’t know why, maybe its because I have more control over the water than with a shower beating down on you, and so in way, I am thankful for bucket baths for now that the weather is cooler.
I am sick – again. Back home, I never got sick, no matter how many people around me where sick, I always seemed to escape the bug. Here, it is the opposite, and I hate it. My host mom is going to make me some onion and cinnamon tea, and I really do hope it doesn’t taste too much like onion, or I’ll gag. Whatever works, I’ll try it.
This month started with the opening of two of our projects: a community center that was renovated and will be used as a meeting place and as a space for artisan classes, and a painting school. All the kids are excited, and I am happy to see that they are interested in the course. My English class started up again, and I gave them an exam the first week back from break. I wish the break had lasted a bit longer, but I had to start it again sometime, sooner or later.
Rubia, Americana, Gringa, Suiza, psssssst. That is what I hear when I walk around town. Rarely do people call me by my name. I hate being called by any of them. Rubia because in no way I am blond, but they use it because of the color of my skin. Americana and Gringa are just annoying. Suiza because there is a community of Swiss people here in town, and they tend to assume that I am. But the most annoying one of all is the hissing. Psssssssssst. Psssssssssst. This is more popular, especially from the men. It continues, even if I don’t turn around. The psssssst’ing gets louder, as if I hadn’t heard them the first few times. Psssssssssssst harder, that will get my attention. When I do accidently turn around or look up, it is to wave at me, or to call me over to them. What am I, an animal? I just wave back. I am told it is a compliment - a piropo, a way of flirting, but to me, it is just annoying. But, I prefer the pssssssst’ing more than the direct flirtations of – you want to have my baby, will you be my wife? No thanks. People here can be very direct. I was walking back home when the old guy at the corner who sells burned DVD’s stops me, takes my hand, and tells me how I have gotten fatter since I first arrived, and would I like to stay here with him and be his wife? Of course! Just what I wanted to hear – please tell me I am fat and that you like me. A few other random people have told me my hips are getting bigger and that I am fatter. Not just “fuerte” but fat. Plain and simple. Then I get the – You’re how old? Why aren’t you married? How many kids do you have? According to most, I should have at least 4 or 5 kids, and be on my third husband. Past thirty, and you are too old to have kids. Why would you want to be an “old” lady with kids?
Rudeness is common here, but they don’t see it as being rude. The insults and bickering go back and forth, and I am learning to be rude back. Yet, when it comes from an Americana it really is considered to be rude and mean. Sometimes I hold my tongue, and other times I can’t help myself and I am “direct” back.
This week marks for the fifth month in country. Crazy how time flies. Two years seem as if they will be here before I know it. These last five months have been a roller-coaster of emotions that I can’t even begin to explain. The littlest things can either make or break your day. The negative things tend to creep up and before you know it, you are breaking down and trying to figure out what the hell happened and where the hell you are. They weren’t joking or being cheesy when during training they told us to look around the room and know that the other volunteers were our support network, because no one else would understand the pain and triumphs that each day brings. With that being said, whenever I am feeling a bit out of sorts I know I can stretch out my arms and my little brother immediately gives me this big bear hug, no questions asked.
