I wrote on Day 6, "Dancing in Delhi," that I took a Bollywood style dance class and that I was feeling hesitant to ever show anyone the video that was taken of this.
I didn't come out and explain exactly why because I wanted to read a few more things before I ventured to talk about cultural appropriation, particularly as it relates to white people like myself either respecting or appropriating Indian culture. This class's description explained that it was designed for "foreigners, no experience required," and that there would be a video of the experience edited and eventually sent to said foreigner.
Hmm. My first question in my head was, is this ethical for me to do as a white tourist? My next thoughts were that I really wanted to learn more about this art form and this seemed to be a way to do it. The dance studio was close to where I was staying and it caused the internet to explode with rave reviews. Ultimately, I chose to do it, as I would be supporting local Indian dancers and their art form while taking the time to learn a little bit about it firsthand.
My questions about ethics continued as I read that there was an extra charge for optional "costume hire." I initially wrote when I e-mailed the dance academy that because I was contacting them with such short notice, I did not want them to feel pressured to locate these special clothes for me. (Their web site stated that they needed reservations at least a week in advance should a person desire to have the "costume.")
They responded that because I was taking the class by myself, they had enough set aside and that I could go ahead with that option if I wanted. I went against my gut and said yes because while I knew it was potentially appropriative, I didn't want to seem like I was scrunching my nose up at this option only to waltz into the dance studio wearing dirty backpacker clothes that were not ideal for dancing. Ultimately, I wanted it to be clear that I respect the culture and that I respected the place in which I was to learn about the culture.
After arriving and being fitted into a "costume," which consisted of a beaded long skirt, sari, and top, the staff at the dance academy stated they were going to perform a traditional Indian welcoming ceremony. One of the staff then placed a garland of orange flowers (similar to a Hawaiian lei) around my neck and applied a "tilak" between my eyebrows, which is a ritual mark that is supposed to be a sign of blessing or greeting. We then placed palms together and said "namaste."
I was more than happy to be a part of this ceremony but wondered how each of the staff felt about it, or how people of color who practice intersectional feminism would feel about it. It was not a question that felt appropriate to ask.
My intentions were good, but I roll my eyes to think of how many times I've heard that in justification of oppressive actions. My good intentions don't take the away the validity of the feelings of those who are potentially oppressed by my course of action. Yes, I was grateful to be opening my mind up to a new experience. Yes, this form of dance proved to be more exhilarating, invigorating, and inspiring to me than any other form of dance I've tried to learn in the past. Yes, I realize that Bollywood movies and their dance routines can be sexist, but so can pretty much every other kind of movie or art form that prescribes to gender roles. Yes, I supported a smaller local business that give the dance teachers a job. But just because I was able to go to India and take this class does not mean that I am entitled to the experience because "I can, and I like it and think it's pretty." When I receive this movie that they are supposed to edit and send me in a couple of weeks, I bear in mind that it is not necessarily easy for others to digest a white girl putting on these clothes, sporting a tilak and doing at best a mediocre job at imitating the moves these teachers were showing me.
The day after I returned from Delhi, an article was published on Everyday Feminism called, "My Generation Hates Cultural Appropriation- but my Indian Parents Love it."
http://everydayfeminism.com/2015/09/indian-parents-appropriation/
I could not believe my eyes when I found the above mentioned article by Nikita Redkar. If I felt "uncomfortable" in my own dissonance, I could only imagine the dissonance the writer must have felt to eventually feel inspired to write and publish this piece of writing. Redkar's dissonance comes from a lifetime perspective of oppression and nuanced generational gaps. I can rub off the tilak and switch back into my sweaty backpacker clothes, hop on a plane back to the United States and resume my white American life. Redkar is caught between two cultures, explaining that she is not embraced fully by one or the other.
So did I make the right or wrong decision? Was I appropriative and/or racist? I think back to what Redkar said about appropriation feeling like "thievery and a selfish promotion tactic" to her. If I were to do it over again, I would consider bringing a long flowy skirt with me that I felt comfortable dancing in with a basic crop or tank top. Would I go to the class again, given the chance? I'm not going to lie, it was extremely fun. Learning to dance properly to some of the most beautiful music I've ever heard was nothing short of amazing and unforgettable. I would hope to uncover an unintrusive way to find out how the dance instructors feel as they are teaching the dances, and how they are treated by their foreign clients. But I am not entitled to know what this experience means to them, and they are entitled to make a living in whichever way they choose. The value of their work and their art is not lessened because they are teaching dance to foreigners, and I am grateful to them for sharing it with me.
When I do receive the video, I will not post the video on my blog, not out of modesty or embarrassment, but because I do not want to use the culture to make myself look more interesting to others. I am posting the video from one of the songs I learned to dance to instead (just 30 seconds). I will use my own videoto continue practicing what I've learned so I can continue to nurture my newfound interest. I want to continue to thoughtfully be an ally to people of color and to other cultures, which means being nondefensive and flexible in these discussions. As such, I welcome feedback.
