Incoming calls and text messages are free (my new digits: +66 084 756 7401)
You walk into the bathroom or "toilet" and have no clue what to do
Everything is same, same, but different
Going to the market means never walking through a door or placing your items on a conveyor belt
At 8am and 6pm the national anthem is projected on loud speakers and the city comes to a halt to pay respect to the King
You get free samples of Redbull while filling up your gas tank
A glass of Coke cures an upset tummy
Mango sticky rice drizzled with coconut milk is dinner
Recycling takes a back seat
Mobile vendors dressed in brightly-colored tunics and hats attempt to sell you their merchandise, including wooden frogs that croak with the stroke of a stick. Annoying.
Fanta comes in all the colors of the rainbow
A 60 minute Thai massage is cheaper than ordering a microbrew at Bridgeport Brewery.
Being "on the job" means holding an oar and steering clear of dangerous rocks
The salt shaker containers sugar
Every item on the menu is accompanied by a photo of the dish
Even ya bahts got baht
Thai scrip is mistaken for Hebrew
Even the most run down houses own a satellite dish
Geckos here, geckos there, geckos everywhere
The sun looks like a bright pink Bubble Yum bubble fading into the sky
Backstreet Boys, Mariah Carey and Celine Dion are still topping the charts
Motor bikes, tuk tuks and automobiles completely ignore the fact that pedestrians exist
You can get by on a $10 a day food budget for the most delicious cuisine
Locals think you're going "kick boxing" when sporting running shorts and sneaks
English movie subtitles tell a completely different story from what's actually going on in the movie
Food carts and street markets line the streets until the wee morning hours
Young Thai women, wearing questionable and minimal clothing, strike up conversations with foreign businessmen on the street corners
Lonely Planet travel guides are carried like lunchboxes
You're questioned 50+ times a day by locals where you come from
Ping Pong is not table tennis
Toilet paper is the centerpiece for every meal
Bug spray with 50% deet doubles as perfume
The only imported beer starts with an "he" and ends with an "hein" and ends with "eken"
There are ten 7 11 drug stores in one square block
