I am so excited to be out of the hospital. I feel like I’ve been reborn in a way. I feel so alive with creative energy that I
hardly can contain myself….
I've been in Peru for exactly 2 months now...half of which has
been inside of a hospital room...in 2 week intervals starting with being
out of the hospital, then 2 weeks in the hospital, then 2 weeks out, then 2 weeks in again. Oy Vey!
The last few days in the clinic,
though, were particularly dark and difficult, because I was physically ready to
leave the hospital from a health standpoint, but I was not allowed to leave
because of bureaucratic paperwork between the insurance and the hospital. In other words, the hospital would not
release me until they had a guarantee of payment letter from the insurance. I originally thought I might get to leave Saturday, then it was Monday, then Tuesday morning, for sure, which turned into Tuesday around 2pm.
I went through a bevy of negative emotions
such as anger, resentment, pity, sadness, depression, etc. because I couldn’t
believe that I was being “held hostage” by the hospital because of paperwork,
language translation issues, policies, etc. even though I was physically ready to be
discharged. But at a certain point I
just surrendered to the situation and instead of fighting it, I simply accepted
it. Instead of making myself the victim,
I just made peace with the circumstances. Ok, well, honestly I went in to “zen warrior” mode
and back out to “poor me” mode and back and forth again many many times over several
days…after all, I’m only human. :)
In all seriousness, this whole
ordeal has been a huge lesson for me in patience, humility, and acceptance of
what is. I’ve been consciously practicing
the art of being solely present minded.
On one hand, it is quite difficult to not re-think the past and/or make
assumptions about the future. On the
other hand, one of the easiest things one can do is to simply breathe and not
think about anything. That is what I
mean by being present. Certainly not a new concept by any means…..but one we often
forget because of all the cray cray in the world and all the thoughts swirling
around in our heads.
Not to get all woo woo on y’all, my dear readers,
but fuck it, it’s my blog and I’m a happy happy man right now……
I'm about to go making assumptions about
the future.....but again....my blog, my rules…..just think, tho…If I’m this energized,
creatively inspired, excited, and appreciative of life now, just think how on
top of the world I will likely feel in 2 or 3 weeks when I can actually walk on
my on two feet again without crutches…….
ok, back to the present. I'm back at my beautiful apartment with my bedroom overlooking the ocean with my niece and nephew, Anna and Dumbo, who I will soon get to walk along the cliffs less than a block from my apartment.
Now it’s time to get busy and do
what I came down here to do…..make some kick ass bad ass (yet commercially viable and wearable) FASHION!
