I Will Go This is my story, thoughts, and emotions before, during and after my trip with Youth With A Mission Sunshine Coast: Around the World 2009.

I don't understand God. At all actually! I do'nt get why we are made to not be able to do anything without Him but He lets us when we try. I don't get why He lets us hurt when He hurts twice as much for us -- apparently. Why does He let us struggle and suffere to learn and then usually fail and curse Him or hurt others? I know He loves me and is my strength and I want to rely on Him fully but it's SO hard! I pray about things, they get better and then they come back. I deal with things but then they come back. God tells me He's with me, helping and protecting, but I always struggle and I always get hurt. I also always hurt others and then have to humble, emberass and hurt myself to make things better. I lose so much of myself every time. But maybe that's the point. Losing myself. I suppose that after all of me is gone all that's left is God.