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Friday 13th

VIETNAM | Friday, 13 February 2009 | Views [379] | Comments [4]

For some people, Friday the 13th marks a day of misfortune where we all should live in fear of being cursed by ill fate. For me, however, Friday the 13th marks nothing more then another day on the calendar. Pretty much all my life I have believed superstition to be nothing more than a load of old wives tales. I presumed that people who genuinely believed in superstition must live very sheltered lives with nothing better to do then worry about black cats, ladders and the combination of the word Friday with the number 13.

Upon doing some research, I discovered that the fear of Friday the 13th is called paraskavedekatriaphobia. Whoever invented this term must have had a cruel sense of humor as anyone inclined to genuinely fear Friday the 13th is surely unable to pronounce nor spell this word. However, after the events of today, I reluctantly admit that I too now suffer from paraskavedekatriaphobia (a word which I can neither pronounce nor spell).

            As with all good stories, it all started yesterday when I decided to eat a one-pound burger (unfortunately this was not its price but it’s weight - equivalent of four quarter-pounders). This decision was not a spontaneous one, in fact it was a meticulously planned event which I had been preparing for all day. No breakfast, little to no lunch and a preemptive gym session to counteract the impending calorie attack. However, nothing could have prepared me for what was to come. The burger itself was the size of a pizza and the height of a coke can, it was impossible to pick up and had to be sliced like a cake – a very meaty cake. The menu proudly boasted that the burger contained a 500 gram patty, six slices of bacon, one entire onion, four tomatoes, four slices of cheese and four entire pickles – I don’t even like pickles! In any case I accepted the challenge like a man and then promptly threw up.


            I woke up today with a distinct pain in my left kidney, it was no doubt in overdrive trying to process the one pound of dead cow inside me. Unfortunately I had little time to complain as I was due to be in school for a long day of lesson planning.  I spent most of the day in the staff room sweating pure liquid fat (the kind left in a frying pan after cooking bacon) and clutching my kidney.


            Things couldn’t get much worse until I felt the iPod my friend had lent me slip out of my pocked and crack on the floor.  The fall rendered the iPod to nothing more then a $250 paperweight, the iPaperweight. To make matters even worse, none of the music on the iPod has been backed-up. In effect, I had both broken $250 dollars of electrical equipment but and destroyed someone’s entire music collection in one…..and my kidney still hurt.


So there you are kids, paraskavedekatriaphobi is perhaps something to be taken more seriously now. 



Steven why would you ever take up that challenge? Your stomach sucks... you get aches after a snack! School boy!!

  Cath Feb 23, 2009 3:19 PM


totally disagree. it was such a pain but the idea of throwing up after eating 500gr of dead cow is somehow more exciting than seeing someone doing the same thing. and how did it end up aching in your kidney but your stomach?
i dont know what u guys westerners do when u bite more than u can chew, but maybe next time you can try some PINEAPPLE. it's safe and it works every time. just eat it raw. or some tamarind is also great for about-to-explode bellies.

  xuan to Feb 24, 2009 2:44 PM


all of my good stories start with eating a one-pound burger too!

  Julia Feb 26, 2009 4:34 PM


its only after you lose everything that youre free to break ipodthing
this is your pain
this is sweeps burning kidney
you are not the burger you eat
seepkjhgfvcxz b

  panda evans Apr 4, 2009 9:15 AM

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