The last time I was in Thailand I really wanted to visit the Saovabha Snake Farm in Bangkok. I have this odd fascination with reptiles and with poisonous reptiles in particular. This snake farm has a live snake show Monday through Friday and I always managed to be in Bangkok just for the weekend. This time I made sure that I was in town on a weekday so that I could watch the milking and the snake show.
The snake farm is affiliated with the Red Cross and it is located in the Silom section of Bangkok, so finding public transportation was not a problem. I got there just in time for the 11:00 venom milking. I watched stupefied as a handler grasped the king cobra behind the head and applied his fangs to the milking funnel. After watching this incredible showing of skill and nerve, I viewed the rest of the exhibits. The staff of the Saovabha Snake Farm have really attempted to make them accessible as well as interactive.
The live snake show was not until 2:30, so I had time to go out for lunch and to make a quick phone call before returning to find a good seat for the show. Before leaving for Thailand, I purchased a Motorola with an international sim card. The rates for a phone call were ridiculous, but I am not one of these folks who walks around with a mobile attached to her ear. I had no difficulty calling home, but when I tried to call a number in Thailand, it would not connect me. I just got dead air. I came to find out though, that they were charging me for this dead air and this really pissed me off. I decided to use a pay phone, but this is easier said than done. There are payphones everywhere in Bangkok, but they always manage to be along streets with a lot of traffic. Bottom line is you can’t hear what the other person is saying over the rumbling of trucks and the honking and the motorcycles that are in need of mufflers. I found a bank of out-of-the-way phones and proceeded to feed one of them coins. It wouldn’t let me dial. I followed the instructions to the letter, and I got a turkey tone in response. I tried a different phone that said it took credit cards, but apparently not my credit card. I gave up after trying two different ones. I tried the phones in the subway station, the phones in stores, and finally the phones along the streets. None of them worked for me, so I gave up and left it for later.
The short hike back to the snake farm allowed me to cool off a bit. I got a seat in the front row of the presentation area and waited with the excitement of a second-grader on a field trip. I was practically bouncing in my seat when the show started. They first brought out a king cobra. That was one big f&^$-ing snake. The handler showed total control as he positioned the reptile in front of the eager audience. The king cobra did not disappoint as he reared up and opened his hood. The moderator said that the king cobra was the longest venomous reptile in the world. He asked if anyone knew which venomous reptile was second-longest. I shot my hand up and said “the black mamba”. Realizing that I had been marked as a complete loser by the other audience members, I did not hesitate to answer the other snake questions. When the moderator asked what the longest snake in the world was, I answered the reticulated python. He corrected me and said that it was the anaconda. I wanted to jump up and shout, “not according to Jeff Corwin!”, but I kept my peace. I had more fun at that show than I care to admit. For the grand finale, they brought forth a Burmese python and allowed audience members to have their picture taken with it wrapped around their shoulders. A group gathered around the snake and the tourists who wanted a photo op. After two or three tourists had their turn I started to feel sorry for the poor reptile, so I gathered my things and headed back to the subway.
