There are some interesting (well, in my opinion anyway) features about my life in Kenya that might interest you too.
1. We go to Connections a lot from you may have gathered, it’s our local and I pretty much always order Fanta, except for the odd time when I treat myself to an Amarula, it’s oh so good. When one orders a soda of any kind, you have to specify that you want it cold (baridi) or they may just bring you a warm (room temperature) one. Sometimes they ask if you want it warm or cold; why would anyone want a warm one I ask myself? It’s well, ick. On a hot day, as most days are in Kenya, you want a cold refreshing beverage, surely that is an internationally known thing is it not? Not so in Kenya. After my first Fanta I now make sure I always state baridi asante – cold please. The same thing goes for beer, which my Tusker-loving friends imbibe frequently. So, if you ever decide to come to Kenya, and you should, it’s wonderful, be sure to ask for cold soda/beer. The alternative is, well, tepid, yuck!
2. Matatu drivers are crazy, seriously certifiable. You have to be to drive a little van that should have a maximum of 14 passengers around the city of Nairobi. Luckily I have not been a part of any sort of traffic altercation (touch wood) but believe me there are many. It is quite an amusing thing being onboard a matatu going into Nairobi. As has previously been mentioned, it is crazy mad driving in the central city; cars everywhere, not obeying road rules, if in fact there are any; pushing into a non-existent space between a truck and some difficult-to-distinguish vehicle; travelling at the speed of turtle in a traffic jam. Matatus though seem to be a law unto themselves. Driving the wrong way down a one-way street is just a quicker way of getting to your stop. Mounting the curb or driving along the footpath to skirt around the other cars is just plain logic. Banging on another matatu or car that is close by so you can be let in is the way it is done. It constantly surprises me, although it shouldn’t by now, how ingenious the methods of getting to the final destination are. No need to go to the Giraffe Centre or Elephant Orphanage just catch a matatu into the city for hair-raising entertainment!
3. When one goes to the bathroom in public places, one would expect a toilet seat to sit on, wouldn’t one? Perhaps not. It seems they are either removed by management or have been stolen although for what purpose I don’t know. If you are lucky there will be toilet paper and the lavatory will actually flush but don’t expect to sit on anything comfortable like a seat. Even our beloved Connections is devoid of toilet seats. It is rather exciting when a water closet with a seat is found; usually this will be at an adequate hotel or in a nice home. You need to relax and take your time to make the most of this rare find. Most fortunately, my home stay has a flushing toilet, toilet paper and seat! Phew!
4. I’m starting to feel as though I might be sleeping on a hammock. This is simply because my mattress has developed a dip in the middle where I usually sleep, particularly in the buttocks area. I have tried sleeping to the hard right or left some nights in an attempt to balance out the dip but more often that not I simply roll back into the middle again. Yes, it is true, I bought a new mattress as the one I was sleeping on had developed such a hollow that I could feel the boards beneath but alas, the same thing is happening with the new purchase. Perhaps I should have splashed out for the $50 mattress and not the $35 one I actually got. Ah well, never mind. I still manage to sleep well each night despite my hammock-like surroundings.
5. There are only so many times you can play Go Fish before you need a change and want to play something else. Ok, let’s try Last Card. However, teaching an 11 year-old how to play Last Card when Swahili is their first language and they don’t know what the suits are called in English makes things rather tricky. Nonetheless we continued and eventually we played some decent hands even if she would still randomly place the jack of clubs on a four of diamonds. Cute.
6. Homosexuality is sadly illegal in Kenya. Prison sentences can range anywhere from 5 to 14 years! This is specifically for men; women are not included in the law. Knowing this was the case I was surprised to see two adult men, both in their 30s/40s wandering along beside the pool at Connections holding hands. Huh? What? “Um, I thought it was illegal or at least very frowned upon” I said to one of The Boys. “Oh no” he replied. “It is common practice for men to walk around holding hands and it means nothing more than friendship and male bonding. It’s also a kind of responsibility thing and looking after your friend.” I guess it’s just the having of the sex with another man that’s illegal; sharing affection in that way is clearly commonplace. Righto then. As you were.
