Delhi men get a bad rep. Fairly so in plenty of cases. Still, some of my most side-splitting laughs have come from these guys, so I had to share a few. Names have been omitted to protect the guilty. Enjoy!
On helping me find a good man:
“I’m not dead C, I'm right here! You just need to lower your standards”
On relationships:
“She’s not my girlfriend! It was a five day relationship.”
On fidelity:
"Find me a good woman"
"You already have one? More than one is greedy"
On best friends:
Me: ‘I want to be your fag hag’
Him ‘I used to be straight you know’
On looking the part;
Him: ‘Stand in front of the mirror and tell me you don’t need to go to the gym’
Me: ‘I’m looking and I’m gorgeous’.
Him: ‘Stand in front of the mirror and look at your stomach’
On being the part:
"THAT's your phone? A Nokia? Oh my god you're poor!"
On standards:
Me: ‘Listen, I’ve dated royalty, models and millionaires – I’m not used to any kind of shabby treatment’
Him ‘I am royalty. You can google my ancestors’
On dumb foreigners:
“Pilau – it means rice!”
On settling down:
Him: ‘So….. if in two years neither of us has met anyone’
Me: ‘……. I’ll still be out of your league’
On attending traditional cultural events:
“I’m turning into a loser because of you.”
On philosophy:
"Life is so random, like... yesterday I didn't have an ear piercing but today I do"
On marrying Delhi men (arranged style):
‘So, he’s standing there telling you about how great he is, how successful, what a man…but at the end of the day……..he’s still a virgin’.
