A year ago, I was in a small Nepali village called Junbesi, in the foothills of the Himalayas.
My picture of life had been completely distorted then. I was beginning to part ways with my partner of nearly 4 years, someone I had relied on for comfort and stability. Suddenly, what I believed to be my life became no more than a pile of mush - a collection of memories that had turned bittersweet and unfulfilled plans that I was once excited about. Losing that false grip of control on life and realising the uncertainty of the future, really unnerved me. As if to add to the pain, I'd sprained my knee and was having serious doubts about being able to continue on the trek.
But in that visible instant, the sun was finally out after two days of rain and from the guesthouse was a beautiful vista,, not of the Himalayas, but of hills and hills of evergreen trees. Children were laughing flying kites outside as our string of wet clothes casually dried on a wall of rocks. Things seemed peaceful enough on the outside and in that moment.
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A year later, I recognise the changes that have happened since. I really didn't know what to expect from 2014. I'd come back to Brisbane only for my job, something that seemed completely ironic to all the lessons learned travelling. I perservered through the anti-climax of returning to "normal" life. I've assimilated back into the various roles I used to do at work. I've become "real" friends that I wasn't too close to before and I've continued to meet new people who continue to support my growth in life regardless of how long they feature in it. I can truthfully say, I am the healthiest I've ever been as a whole - physically, mentally and socially. When I bought my apartment three months ago, it came as a surprise to many including myself. But like many things, it didn't scare me as much as it used to.
In this moment, the sun is shining and the weather is a delightful temperature. I am sat on my beautiful Afghan kilim as I type this. The washing machine hums in the background. It is similar to my moment last year - the visible looks near picture perfect, the invisible, uncertain. Only this time, I realise there is no need to spend energy being afraid of the future or sad about the past, but instead to really soak up today, this moment, now.
