We arrived at Surat Thani airport after a very short flight. Took about an hour. Basically we traded 1000 baht ($30) to save a 14 hour bus trip which may or may not have had A/C and we were both so hung over it would have been hell. We caught a bus to the port to catch a boat. It about 430pm when we get at the port. Overnight sleep ferry doesn't leave for 6 hours it ends us costing us 200 baht each ($6) and will be about a 6 hour ride. I don't know how these people make money. We ended up meeting some Scottish guy (I think his name was Matt). We sat with him for 6 hours. We sat and the same area I sat last year when I was with Michelle and Stacy. Some guy from Manchester sat with us after about 2 hours. We couldn't understand a word this fucking guy said even though he spoke perfect English. He's like a UK version of Boomhower off of the cartoon show "King of The Hill". He mumbled every word, spoke softly and quickly. How is it that two people can speak English but not even understand each other? During our wait for the sleep ferry we eat street food at the market and we are subjects for English surveys from random girls from a university. Kyle ended up getting targeted going to the toilet. He's a pretty white guy so he gets a lot of attention. Most of the advertisements here are of beautiful white people. It's pretty funny. During our wait time we see the locals constantly building stuff and loading stuff into the boats; taking stuff down, putting stuff up and taking it down again. I wonder if they are union laborers from Alberta as it looks like they are needlessly doing pointless takes to pass time.
We board the sleep ferry and it's different from when I took it when I went to koh phangan roughly a year ago. This one they made up take off our shoes at the entrance way. It takes it about 30 minutes to board and take off in super slow motion. I go and take a piss with is a toilet with a hole in the bottom and a giant bucket beside it. I pop some vailum I bought for 200 baht in Bangkok 100baht/10 pills, I give some to Kyle and we start to sleep. I am right at doorway to a room that leads to the only toilet for about 50-70 people on the boat. Everyone has to step over the biggest guy on the boat. I woke up once to use the toilet and here is about half an inch of space in the toilet room door and hinge so if you are a creeper you could get a really good look at someone taking a shit. I use the washroom bare feet because it's wet on the floor and I don't have my shoes because they are at the entrance. Kyle later tells me he woke up several times to take a piss and at one point there was about an inch of piss in the toilet room swishing back and forth, it was at that time he made the executive decision to piss off the back of the boat. There was a small group of hardcore people that sat at the back of the boat drinking all night. I had a great sleep.
We get into the dock at Koh Samui and there are several locals in super tight undies climbing around other huge tall boats like monkeys. All of they are super lean, if I was a gay man I would be in heavan at this moment. We ended up taking a cab to a place called Chawang Beach. It's about 8am. We walk with some guy from Vancouver I think. We walk for two hours looking for a place. We end up finding a hotel for 500 baht per person. It has A/C, a television and a nice private shower. Kyle decides to go for a run on the beach I decide to get street food somewhere. I walk for about an hour and find the perfect stand that has street soup for 40 baht which is a little over a dollar. I walk about and proceed to get lost for about an hour and a half. I come back and I'm just sweating buckets and have some sunburn on the back of my neck and on my face. Kyle is just laughing at me. During our whole stay we watch a pop music channel which has the most rediculous videos around the world. Most of them are from Korea. Kyle convinces me to rent a motorbike "I'm all like my family will freak out if they know I rented a motorbike". I decide to go for it, it's just like riding a bike he tells me. no shifting involved just gas and break. Kyle used to race motorcross so he has a lot of experience with motorbikes. People are crazy fucking drivers on the island and they drive on the opposite side of the road. We end up checking out some waterfall. Kyle ran out of gas and some old lady sold him some gas but wanted to keep the glass bottle, she has a broken arm and proceeded to pour gas down her cast while trying to fill up a plastic bottle. We decided to check out the night life and ended up going to this some ice room and a eventually made it to a place called Ark bar. Little kids selling us glow in the dark stuff till 230am. Those kids sure know how to sell and it's very tough to say no. We catch a motorcycle taxi back to our hotel. Once we get off the taxi driver asks if we want a private ping pong show in our room rediculous... The next day we take our motorbikes back and leave for the boat for koh phangan. It is about 30 minute ride but it takes about an hour to load up. We stragically placed ourselves in the back so we could get off the boat first. I accidently kicked some guy in the face. My legs were hanging over the edge and he was on the level below me. He gave me a thumbs up so it's all good. We had some trip beers on the boat ride.
