Mother's tears

“Every woman is fragile, but every mother is strong.”
When I first saw this sentence in a Chinese magazine called Readers, I could not understand it. As time goes on, I realized that it is a more philosophical saying. A mother has to be strong both physically and mentally to protect her children. I changed my mind after I saw my mother’s tears.
In my memory, my mother treats me very strictly. She always wants me to be the best among my peers, and that is why she plays the role of a supervisor in my life: she required me to study hard before I even realized how important it is to study; she has asked me to behave well since elementary school; wanting me to have diverse interests, she sent me to many kinds of cram schools to learn calligraphy, Ping-Pong and skating. Over and over, she says “Do not cry”. She thinks tears are the symbol for cowardice; a real man should not cry. Now, “do not cry” has become one of my mottos and I rarely cry, even when frustrated. My mother has always appeared a strong woman who can handle all her problems by herself. As a strong woman, she does not cry.
However, there was a moment she actually cried. She cried because of me.
It was August 14, 2012, the day I departed from China to the United States for college. In the airport, I hugged all my relatives one by one; the last one was my mother. I thought she would say something like “study hard”, but she just kept silent and hugged me tightly. A few seconds later, I felt something warm drop on my shoulder: one drop, two drops. It was my mother’s tears. That was the first time I saw my mother cry like a child, and I was so stunned that forgot to say something to comfort her. Words could not express our feelings. We just hugged each other, cried.
Once I talked with my father on Skype later; he told me that was the second time he had seen my mother cry—the first time was when they got married. From that time, I started to understand that my mother is not as strong as I thought she was. In teaching me to be mature, she sacrificed more than I can imagine. She just pretends to be strong to set a model for me.
Instead of saying “Every woman is fragile, but every mother is strong”, I would rather say “Every woman is fragile, but every mother is strong because of her love for her children”. I hope that is the first and last time I will see my mother’s tears, and I will make every effort to keep her happy and smiling.
I will not cry, and I will not let you cry. I love you, mother.