One of the Indian myths to be unveiled is the belief that all white bearded gurus, sieges, and enlightened teachers dwell somewhere here between the Himalayas and the Ganges, and if only you opened your heart and humbly touched their feet...
Surprise! Enlightenment does not have a definite geographic address and seems to be found in India or Europe, or America or anywhere else you happened to be (mind you, the principal of opened heart would be still valid).
Our guru "shopping" in India has been full of hopes for teachers as accessible and approachable as the Buddha himself. The last months have proved to me that any aspirations of finding the "ideal" teacher are naive, unrealistic, and frankly disrespectful to who I and many Westerners in fact are - a product of a very complex culture, under which influence we have learnt to discriminate and think independently, to search and listen for guidance from outside but also within ourselves, to draw from many sources in our query about the world. Today I feel there can't be one teacher for me, "the one", "the enlightened" I want to follow. But let me explain.
Eastern culture emphasises strongly the need of a guru, a guide and a vital support on any one's spiritual path. As I understood it before, it meant looking for a person who would naturally excite and motivate you on your way, a person to revere and measure up to. It is clear now why my encounters with Buddhist and Yoga teachers gave a mighty blow onto my expectations. The Tibetan teachers I an Misha visited in Dharamsala although very knowledgeable, focused and exotic in their cold Himalayan way did not inspire my impatient academic mind trained to digest gigabytes of information on regular basis. Tibetans teach as if there were lifetimes allotted for dharma study :-) Their roundabout way of pointing to the tiniest essence challenged me more than the teachings themselves :-)
In this context, I and Misha were looking forward to the Introduction to Buddhism course given by the Tushita monastery in Mcleod Ganj. The course was taught by a Western Buddhist nun and a new expectation arose: to receive a translation of the teachings, which would be sensitive to the western emotional and psychological world. Alas! Even though the teachings were much more entertaining and dynamic than the ones we got at the Tibetan Library, they were not less traditional and we had to battle again with the terms so tricky as "self", "anger and self assertion", "attachment" and "compassion". Here is a little light at the end of the tunnel: teachers that awake any emotion in us, even disagreement or irritation, are doing us more good that those who leave us indifferent. The reactions we had to the teachings during the course lead to much reading and contemplation, which at the end felt fruitful and somewhat satisfying.
I highlight of our stay in Dharamsala for me was the opportunity to meet with Ani (Tibetan nun) Tenzin Palmo, who gave a short question-answer session at Tushita. I had read a collection of her talks as well as biographical work on Tenzin Palmo's striking will and determination in her 12 year cave retreat in the mountains of the Himalayas, but I could not possibly imagine that a single person could literally shower a room of 100 and more with love and that it would be perceivable. I know it sounds cheesy, but I have never been moved in my life by someones pure presence! I did not relate to this woman's ambitions to become the female Bodhissatva (enlightened) or to her affinity to austere life and solitude. Yet, her mere walking into the room and then looking at the crowd gathered there in part to satisfy their curiosity brought tears to my eyes. I was astonished to find myself feeling the same way after she had left the room, just much motivated to see her again, ask my questions, argue with her :-), just be in her presence.... Do I sound devotional? :-)
To add to our collection of "gurus" we headed to Bir, a curious place just south of Mcleod Ganj which is an abode to hot headed para gliders, and "cold headed" dharma students. A tiny village as it is, the settlement managed to cater to both groups offering mountains and richest Tibetan monasteries we had seen so far. The Deer Park Institute for Indian Culture was offering a retreat on awareness in the art process. The lectures and workshops on poetry, calligraphy, ikebana, and even Indian music were delightful, but the centre of the retreat were the teachings of a Tibetan rinpoche, well known and followed by many Westerners. Our curiosity satisfied, we left Bir still wondering at what attracts people to rinpoches (Buddhis teachers) who's teaching style, even when presented in a brilliant English, remains foreign and quite extravagant.
In the whole, my biggest challenge in the teacher searching process was to restrain my criticism and judgment. Naturally, when another westernised Tibetan guru residing in Bir turned us back when we asked for an audience I felt completely defeated :-) May be, if I had the knowledge of my learning needs, that is to meet many people and to draw from numerous sources, I wouldn't have put so much expectations on each of the teachers we met.
As for the Yoga teachers, read my letter on Rishikesh :-)
