Last week there was day after long, hot day of feeling anxious to get the program started, we students were all saying the same thing, ‘OK, let’s go, we’re ready, come on already…..’ And, of course, now that classes have begin we’re ready for some downtime already. Our hips, backs and knees are screaming from sitting cross legged on the floor for hours on end, we’re wondering if we’ll ever memorize the daily invocations, if we’ll have enough breath to hold an Aum as long as the swami can, whether we can manage five months of such a micro-managed and over scheduled life. That’s us being un-enlightened, focus-on-the-negative human beings. Sadhguru writes that we are not human beings, we are human becomings, an ongoing process, a possibility - so I am reminded to focus on the positive aspects of being here at the ashram. I am responsible only for myself, I may have classes to go to, but I don’t also have to go to a job, cook my food, gas up my car, pay bills, clean house… an endless list of things to be grateful for. I am indeed privileged to be here and have this opportunity and I’m sincerely grateful. My only chore is washing my clothes in the shower and pegging them outside on a line to dry every few days. So far nobody has absconded with any of my garments, but I’m still not going to hang my precious Spiderman knickers out there, that might be tempting fate.
About the Invocations, the one that we sing before each class or meal goes like so:
Aum… Aum… Aum…
Asatoma sadgamaya
Tamasoma jyotirgamaya
Mrutyorma amrutangamaya
Aum Shanthi… Shanthi… Shanthihi
Which means: ‘From untruth to truth. From darkness to light. From mortality to immortality. May I be led.. Aum. Peace, Peace, Peace.’ A lovely prayer, but I’m transported back to primary school, mouthing along to hymns that I didn’t know the words to; I was pretty good at it then. As I'm pretending to be an adult nowadays, rather than lip synching, I’ve been listening, trying to memorize the syllables so I can repeat them, but I’m just not an auditory learner. I've finally given up and plan to take a print out with me so I can read the words as they are sung. I hope I don’t get a rap on the knuckles with a ruler for cheating! I fear my lack of auditory learning ability will be an ongoing challenge, as I have to memorize the Sanskrit names for 84 asanas, as well as a scripted instruction (in English) to go with each of them. My aging brain is feeling the strain, but no worries, it’s a good vaccination against dementia, right?
Last night after our evening meal we met for a class session that was quite amusing. One of our instructors schooled us in how to eat south Indian style, in other words, with our fingers. As I’ve mentioned before, dinner is taken sitting on the ground, and eaten with the fingers of the right hand. I was a little hesitant initially, but quite enjoy using my fingers now that it‘s familiar. I find feeling the temperature and texture of the food, mixing the grain and the sauce together, and bringing it to my mouth with my fingers really adds something to the experience. More than just the potential for a mess, I mean. Be prepared if we go out to eat together when I get back to California, folks; I may be short on dining companions pretty quickly. We participants take turns serving the group, walking up and down the row with a metal bucket full of food, so our teacher also covered the etiquette around that; given that the meal is taken in silence there are gestures to indicate yes, no, a little, more, etc. He also informed us in what order the food is to be eaten, (from raw to cooked), showed an amusing video on how to eat from a banana leaf (for special occasions), and shared that it’s perfectly acceptable to lick your fingers. The finger licking permission increased my quality of life immensely; I’m like a toddler with a birthday cake at times. One fellow participant is left handed and while serving in the main dining hall (prior to this helpful class), he almost gave one older lady a heart attack by serving her with his left, there’s nothing like being swatted and yelled at in a foreign language to challenge your sense of inner peace. Poor guy.
To those of you concerned that I’ll return from this adventure a physical shadow of my former self, don’t worry! I think I’ve actually put on a few pounds since I’ve been here. The food is vegan, tasty, nutritious and plentiful, I eat huge servings twice a day and am utilizing far fewer calories at present than I do at home. Maybe that will change we start to practice the hatha yoga asanas. Currently we’re learning something called Upa yoga, which is essentially a stretching exercise for all the joints of the body and is used as a warm up prior to the hatha yoga asanas. Even the two days I’ve been practicing upa yoga has provided different instruction than I’ve received in other yoga classes. At home, teachers usually have us spreading our fingers wide for poses where the hands are supporting our weight, but here the fingers and thumb are aligned and touching. Also different is that eyes stay closed for most poses, so that we remain inwardly focused. This is a bit of a balancing nightmare, but I suppose I’ll adapt to it. Currently, I’d much rather be straining every muscle in my body to get into a posture, or be falling over in an asana with my eyes closed, than be sitting static in siddhasana (an advanced cross legged pose). I think it might literally be killing me to sit in siddhasana so much, but I hope it’s making me more flexible; sure I’m being melodramatic, but really, today I was in so much pain just sitting there that I broke out in a sweat. Aum… Here’s hoping that next time I write is to delight you with tales of my excellent, pain-free siddhasana, complete mastery of the invocation, and continued possession of my spidey-pants!
