meanderings

so this is a wee story about when i was back in venezuela, i met some people who managed to get a tour farily cheap and managed to get the same deal. the tour was to a place called los llanos, home of coyboys and flat landscape, chavez's home state and a multitude of exotic animals.

so we were supposed to leave merida on saturday morning at 8am, but our guide tony only turned up at 9:30. we had been out the night before and he had been at this bar for this live dub jazz group and i remember him saying ok guys, dont party too hard tonight, we have a long drive tomorrow. those words seem quite funny now with him being so late. but the bar we had been at was pretty cool, and played an eclectic range of music, from ramstein to drum n bass, breaks and salsa. they made these toxic green caipirainas which could have stripped paint. so a good night.

so when tony arrived there were 5 of us waiting, we had to wait even longer as there were some others joining us. i had time to run and pick up my camera which the guy couldn't fix, needed some part that he couldn't get in venezuela. might still be abel to get it fixed somewhere but we'll see. so when we finaly got moving it was so hot, and the drive was not exactly short. with ten of us sitting in the back of this 4wheel drive where the back seats all face each other. not exactly comfortable. we stopped for this fantastic meal of smoked meat and yukka, and all sorts of other delicious food over looking this amazing valley. was really a nice start to the trip. but we arrived after dark at his place in los llanos, because of the flat landscape you have this amazing view of the entire sky and as the sun goes down you can see the light bleeding from the sky as it sets. we stopped for much needed supplies of some alcohol and water and a few other things. the heat in los llanos was overwhelming, i had forgotten how hot the rest of venezuela was compared to merida. the first night we all pretty much just crashed, we were all staying in this octagonal hut with a centre post where all these hammocks were strung up for us to sleep. sleeping in hammocks is not as easy as it would seem but once you get it its so comfortable.

on our first day we had this huge breakfast then headed out on a long river boat which swayed precariously the whole time, and with 12 people in it, made things interesting. tony's place was right next to the wetlands so we were able to launch the boat from there as did other groups visiting los llanos. his place had alot of caimans just lazing in the water as well as other animals. but once we were launched we saw so many different animals, caiman, iguanas, birds, capibara; which is the biggest rodent in the world. it kind of looks like a giant guinea pig, except its the size of a dog. it swims in the water so the spanish invaders originally said that it was a fish, and because the meat aparently tastes like fish. so when they conquered the indigenous tribes this was the only meat they were allowed to eat over easter as technically acording to the wisdom of the invaders it was not meat, but fish. go figure. during our trip we also saw some fresh water dolphins which were very cool. the adults are this pinkish colour aparently due to the amount of piranhas they eat. pirhanas have red flesh. so the baby dolphins start off as blue but turn pink as they get older. these dolphins are completely blind and have movable necks as unlike sea dolphins they dont need speed they need  to be able to manuever through the roots of the streams. they also have  arms which they use to pull themselves through tight places. and like sea dolphins use ultrasound to find their way, but they also have the ability to hunt with ultrasound. they send out pulses which stun the fish allowing them to be eaten. pretty impressive. tony tried to swim with them a couple of times, leaping off the boat as we were going along. if levi's ever wanted to  make an ad about the archetypal levi's man, tony would have been him. when he was swimming
he never swam long because of the pirhanas. aparently though the dolphins made it safe to swim for a while... but not too long. we met up with this other group and went hunting for this huge turtle. i cant remember what it was called but its the fastest sideways turtle. it had this really long neck and was one fo the ugliest things you have ever seen. its head kind of went out like a hammerhead shark. that was a great start to the tour. the engine crapped out just as we were getting back to tony's and had to puch with sticks to get back to shore. during the middle of the day it was too hot to do much except chill in the hammocks and sleep off the food. but once the heat left a bit, we jumped on the jeep and went out for a jeep safari. half of us riding on the roof. we had great panoramic views of the area but had to dodge low hanging trees.

we headed to where one of the guys tony works with had seen an anaconda the day before so we went back to try and find it. we had only been looking for about 15 minutes when we found it. it was lying in the mud and we gathered round to have a look, but we weren't very close. there was this canadian guy who was a bit of a twat who had been going on about how much he loved getting in amongst the animals and how much he wanted to see an anaconda. but when tony dove at the head and the snake started thrashing about trying to wrap itself around him this canadian guy could not run any faster in the opposite direction. we all almost pissed ourselves laughing. but tony was having a bit of trouble holding the anaconda with his two helpers and a couple of us had to run in and help pick it up. man that thing was heavy. it weighed about 200kgs and was about 5m long. you could feel how strong it was with its muscles rippling along its skin. it was incredible. after we'd had a good look at it and could see where different bumps showed some unfortunate creature as dinner we let it back into the mud.

after that we drove for a little while again on the roof. was such a cool way to see the area, and we drove to where another group was waiting for the sunset. we watched as it got bigger and bigger until it finaly went down. the ride home i should have ridden inside, there were so many bugs that even when i turned with my back facing forward it felt like i was constantly getting stung as they hit my back. i had no shirt on the entire safari and usually that was fine but at night the bugs came out to play. i almost had a meal of bugs before turning around. that night tony's business partner arrived with another group so there were a few more people. we got some coconuts and had more ruma dn coconut drinks. so refreshing.

the next day saw us horseriding, our group split in half with the 'experienced' riders people in the first group. experienced in that they had ridden before. the other went back out on the jeep. it turned out to be a bit frustrating as we kept having to wait for the others to catch up, mostly for that annoying canadian guy. i thought we were going to ride for a lot longer but didn't really get off the road. but by the end i had the sorest ass ever. so i guess it was kind of good we didn't ride longer. we caught up with the others and swapped as we went out on the jeep for a bit.

after lunch we chilled again till the worst of the heat had gone. i bought a hammock off tony after id been asking him where a good place to buy them was. its a nice big one in the venezuelan colours of red yellow and blue. in the avo we went back out on the jeep in another direction. on the way we stopped and tony ran out and caught a caiman, man those thigns can run fast. they have such intense skin, which they use as solar panels for energy. we saw an anaconda trail but it led into deep water and tony was not that keen to go swimming for it. understandably so. we almost caught an iguana but our dive tackles were not fast enough. they just go like lightning. we found a group of baby turtles which were very cute. while driving we suddenly stopped as soemone had spotted this shape running in a field next to the road. we all busted out of the jeep and went into the field. a group of us had to run out and try and drive it towards the road. it was this giant anteater. it ran so awkwardly. with this giant squirrel tail. it was probably about 1.5-2m longs. i thought we were trying to catch it at first so had been just about to leap at it when tony pointed out that it had 3 inch claws that they used to disembowel hasty kiwis if they made that mistake. but it was a fantastic looking creature. we saw another on the way back but had had enough of running around in the heat.

the whole time driving there were these massive flocks of birds that would rise up as we got close. very national geographic. they would rise up in a cacophony of sound and fill the air with birds. it was crazy impressive. we stopped at the same place where we'd foudn the baby turtles to fish for pirhanas. that was definately an experience. we fished with other little fish and you had to be very quick as the pirhanas would take your bait really quickly. you can see how you would not last very long in the water. you had to throw your line in and almost instantly start pulling to hook the fish. the hook was litterally in the water for like 2seconds. they just tear things apart. not keen to swim thankyou very much. we caught enough for dinner that night. they were very tasty. we had them fried, and you had to eat them like hamburgers. eating both sides at once as they had alot of bones. i manage to keep the bottom jaw of mine and am carrying them around with me.

the next morning we left los llanos feeling very content with out weekend. i was dropped off in barinas and wound up waiting like 10 hours for the bus. and being the day before xmas there wasn't shit open. and the only decent thing i had to read was my lonely planet, but man you can only read that for so long before getting sick of reading where are good places to stay where's good to eat, what you should see. what dangers and annoyances there are...