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The Four 'F's

CHINA | Tuesday, 21 February 2012 | Views [637]

When I was first teaching in Thailand, there was a British guy in my school called Martin.  Martin came from Newcastle, was tall and thin, and had travelled around South East Asia with a kettle so he could make a proper cuppa (and before anyone rolls their eyes at this ridiculous British need for tea with milk and sugar, let me tell you that I met a lovely French lady in Darjeeling who did exactly the same thing.).  Martin had a theory about the things you miss from home.  He said they all began with ‘F’.  I’ve thought about this idea a lot over the years I’ve spent in Asia, and he is quite right.  All the things I miss begin with ‘F’.  So, in no particular order, here they are!

F Number One:  Family

Aah, family.  Yes, sometimes they drive you crazy, but when you spend a long time apart from them you really grow to appreciate them.  I’m sure that the reason my family gets along so well now is because I spent almost four years away from them, and when I got back I realised how much they meant to me.  It’s even worse now because I have a little niece and nephew who didn’t exist last time I was in Asia and who make being away much more difficult (next time I may smuggle my nephew out of the country in my backpack; he wants to see an elephant).  Adults may collect some more wrinkles and grey hairs in nine months, but little kids change so much, they’re going to be completely different when I next see them.  I really feel I’m missing out on seeing that evolution, not to mention birthdays, Christmases and making Halloween scary spider cupcakes.   Added to which is the fact that my parents are not getting any younger and dad’s in poor health, so from time to time I feel bad to be away for so long.  So far it’s not been possible to have a good long chat on Skype because of slow internet connections, but I’ve been writing real letters on real paper, you remember those!   

F Number Two:  Friends

I don’t know how many friends are reading this, but if you are a friend and you are reading, I miss you!  Like, a lot!  Friends are the people you drink tea with, have coffee with, chill out with, put the worlds to rights with and share your shit with.  I really miss all that!  Probably it’s exacerbated by the fact that I cannot have a conversation with anyone at the moment, but I’m really looking forwards to just being able to hang out with people I know and care about, have fun and relax!  Since I left, one friend has had a baby, or at least his wife has, and another baby is due before I get home.  There’s going to be a lot of catching up to do!

F Number Three:  Food

Okay, so it’s not like the food here is in any way bad.  In fact, today’s lunch was quite a feast (no idea why!), but I think everyone who spends time away from their country misses food.  Sometimes when I’m training, I’ll get a phantom food smell.  Once, quite early in my time here, I could smell fried egg sandwiches which was most distracting, and I have also smelled apple crumble which is enough to reduce me to tears.  The worst is when my mind starts playing the ‘what would I eat if I could eat anything’ game, never a good idea when you absolutely cannot eat anything of your choosing.  It goes like this: 

‘Hmmm, eleven thirty, nearly lunchtime.  I’m quite hungry!  Do you know, a nice, spicy chili would be really good today, maybe with a baked potato.  And some sour cream.  Yeah, that’s what I’d like.  Bit of side salad too.  Desert?  Why not!  Aha!  One of Aaron’s chocolate mousses.  And a coffee…….’  

Then you come back to reality and the likelihood of noodles which, delicious though they are, are not a chili with a baked potato!     

F Number Four:  Football

It’s possible there may be limited sympathy for me here.  I am quite surprised myself as to how much I actually miss football.  In other places I’ve been to, I’ve either had access to ESPN, or I’ve been able to stream matches online.  I don’t have my own internet connection here, nor do I have ESPN.  I’m reduced to reading post-match reports.  The worst thing about it is that Spurs are having their best season in a very, very long time. (Let's ignore for a minute the 0-0 result against Stevenage!)  ‘Tottenham Hotspur’ and ‘contenders for the title’ are not words I ever expected to see in the same sentence, but that’s how well they’re playing.   And I can’t watch anything!  It’s infuriating beyond belief, especially as it looks like the man who’s in a large part responsible for their current good form may well be off to manage the national team.  Boohoo!  Don’t care about them! 

Then there’s a few general things I miss.  The sound and smell of rain.  Being able to understand people.  Washing machines (you have no idea how lucky you are to have a washing machine!)  Radio 4.  Spliffs.  Has to be said.  I was doing fine, not missing it at all until a couple of weeks ago when I suddenly thought how nice it would be to smoke a joint while I watched ‘Boardwalk Empire’.   Then there’s pubs, friendly dogs, being clean, having more than two possible outfits to wear………..  I could go on but there’s an FA Cup post-match that’s just waiting to be read.   

 

 

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