A Mind to Travel

My idea of meditation consisted of a lone old man sitting cross-legged, maybe up on a grassy hill. His mind is blank.

This is not exactly accurate. On a warm night on the island of Ko Pha Ngan, Thailand, I was ready to set the record straight.

Our guided meditation was conducted by the resident astrologist, Victoria. She is a loving and carefree older woman, who looks like she came straight from Hogwarts.

We closed our eyes, and she slowed our breathing. We started out strolling along the beach to a cave. Upon entering, there was a door. After going through the door we were in a vast field, meeting a man with a walking stick. He was our meditation guide.

I was doing terrible. The more I tried to focus on a beach scene, or imagine a door, the more static my brain created. I began to wonder if my door was too boring, and if my fellow meditators were being more creative than me. Tons of images crowded my mental vision, it was hard to push them away and follow Victoria’s steady voice. My meditation guide was a cartoon old man. I’m not sure, but this may signify my slight disbelief that I can actually have a meditation guide in my mind.

I lapsed into sleep. I know this, because I woke myself up with a big snore.

The meditation had progressed to a point where we were supposed to be meeting with Venus. She was handing us a gift. I was too busy being embarrassed to listen. We were gradually pulled out of our meditations. (I just opened my eyes.) Everyone sat quietly, holding on to the visions they had. Victoria encouraged us to remember the gift from Venus, and for a moment I had a horrible, sinking feeling- what if she asked me what I got, in front of all these serious meditators! (Was this my punishment for falling asleep and snoring?!) Clearly I would have to make something up on the spot, and my brain was stuck in a hazy fog. Luckily, she didn't ask anyone. I left thinking about what hard work controlling your mind is.

Meditation seems to be one of those slippery things that the more you try, and the harder you grasp for it, the further it slips away. I found the act of thinking itself strange, and wondering if my inner dialogue would calm down enough to let me sit in peace. It is impossible to think of “nothing.” The object is to concentrate fully on ONE thing. Meditation is surprisingly difficult. With a lot more practice, I know I can reach a state of higher achievement and knowledge.

This isn't just for old men sitting on a hill, but so much more.