The Quintessential Can-alian

There it was. I had dreamt about this moment many an afternoon spent staring out the window of my classroom. It was a beast of a structure with steel aesthetics that screamed, "MOUNT ME!". Well, what was I suppose to do? I couldn't simply ignore the request of a relic that stood so triumphantly proud.

After we arrived in France, a pact was made between my friend Ness and I. How could we make our Parisian adventure that much more enjoyable? After sipping a cafe latte and gobbling down our hot baguettes, we collectively experienced an overwhelming feeling of 'ennui'. A kind of french sadness or melancholy that comes when something is missing in your life. There was an emptiness, a void that needed to be filled. My leg twitched with eagerness.

Throughout our university years, Ness and I developed a passion for doing out of the ordinary things. It's just something we do. One such thing was putting our leg on random objects and making it look sexy. It was a talent. A gift one would say. Well, it was more of a thing that set us apart from our many friends who liked to pout their faces like a starved goldfish to achieve the perfect selfie. Instead, we embraced the ironic leg mount or 'Leggie' as it had become known in some circles. It is a truth universally acknowledged that putting your leg on an object automatically makes not only the object sexy but the leg mounter themselves a bone fide sex god. Fire hydrants, kitchen stools and 'Slippery when wet' signs have all been transformed by the 'Leggie'. However, the time had come to spread this photo phenomenon to the world.

After sitting at that cafe with Ness for several hours, it hit me. My leg was itching to get itself up on a foreign object. We agreed it was time to show the parisian people what they had been missing all these years. Sure France is sexy. They drink red wine, enjoy some smooth jazz and take pride in dressing impeccably in designer brands but come on France, loosen up! Ness and I looked at each other then looked up at our destiny. Ness decided I should do the honours and what an honour it was to be spreading the beauty of the 'Leggie' to the people of France. Bracing my core, I fit my humble foot on the side of the tower. Huzzah! I felt it tremble and shake. It was like sexiness was oozing from the structure of the Eiffel Tower. Today, our mission was complete. Europe, get your leg up!