This post will be intended for all the funny stories, explanations of Guatemalan society derived from various conversations, descriptions of other volunteers will be placed. This post is likely to be updated frequently, and will probably end up being my lengthiest post. Thses stories often occur at Casa Shekina and my construction site or other random places. These stories are also included here if I felt they were not large enough to merit their own post.
1. I will often hear or experience stories on Wedenesday morning. There is a simple logic to this. Tuesday nights are lady's nights at Mono Loco, a popular sports bar 10 minutes away from the house. These nights are so popular due to the river of cheap alcohol available to the patrons, averaging around 4 quetzales or 50 cents per drink, shot etc.
My first experience of this night came from Emily, a girl who seemed to be fond of my roommate, Aaron, a taller American who had travelled to Guatemala with his mother and who was also visiting his aunt, also living in Guatemala on a permanent basis. My first Tuesdays, she, along with several other girls, proceeded to barge in to our rooms and jump on a sleeping Aaron. Shrieking and yelling they would depart after 5 minutes. Surprisingly my roommate had no recollection of this the next day, in stark contrast with me. But this is nothing compared to the following Tuesdays. One Wednesday morning, me munching gently on a pancake with strawberries at half past six in the morning, 2 girls made a dramatic entrance. Never could have I imagined what they would tell us. They had just made their way back home. They had met some guy who had claimed to be a race car driver and who had invited them back to his place. His place turned out to be a mansion outside of Antigua and how those girls managed to return home is beyond my comprehension, particularly since they commenced their walk home in the dark. I must admit that I respect their fearlessness, as they could not stop laughing when recounting their adventure.
Neither is Tuesday a requirement for baffling drunk stories. This Monday it was Ashlar's turn to take the stage. Suffering from ADD, a curvy blonde femme she found it difficult to sit still at times and did not significant alcoholic inducement to start fooling around. I had met her the day before and had gone out with her and some other people who stayed for the weekend. As the night was winding down towards bedtime, she proceeded to start climbing up the metal grates in front of windows we passed. If there had been something else to latch on she would have, I thought then. It was no surprise therefore to hear on Tuesday morning my roommate discussing how the night prior, wanting to enter the kitchen but finding it locked, Ashlar had climbed and descended into the kitchen from above. Either that or she simply broke a window. Neither was it surprising when Alex, a friendly and jovial Canadian in my group Spanish class, recounted how he had gratefully accepted an Oreo cookie from Ashlar. What he had not anticipated was that the cookie was a pot cookie, making Alex baked out of his mind, in his words. Despite her just being in the country for 2 days, this was not surprising, since in coinversation 2 days before, she ad divulged to me that she had bought 2 pounds of marijuana, for 3 grand, and had proceeded to use and sell it to friends for the better half of the year. Considering she had made a 10 thousand dollar profit, despite the persistent attention of the FBI, I found a delightful person to talk her with wonderfully unconventional wit and humor.
2. 4th of July was celebrated widely in Antigua due to the sheer number of Americans present and the desire of all the local tourism industry to benefit from it. Casa Shekina also has many Americans who were pumped for the holiday and wanted to celebrate. Knowing that I had no placement the next day and having promised Alex, a classmate in my group Spanish class, that I would have a drink with him before he left, I had agreed to join the rest of the misfits from my house.
Any celebration in Antigua is not a celebration without the bang of firecrackers. And no simple firecrackers either, they are linked in rows so that when you light one they all go off one after the other in quick succession. Alex had recently got into the taste of using them, since he had used extensively three days prior for Canada Day. Walking towards the house party in Alex´s former house, he set off several firecrackers, even returning to to one that had failed to explode in order to finish the job.
The party itself was a typical North American college house party, people of various backgrounds united by their affinity for alcohol and the desire to have a good time. People played beer pong, talked and some burgers were evn made. As someone remarked to me, this party could have been taking place anywhere in the world where young Amercians, Canadians are abundant.
Surprisingly very few of us from Casa Shekina had joined Alex and so we ended up in La Sala, an establishment many people go to dance. I had actually been in La Sala my first night, dancing on the bar table, even though I did not pay much attention to where it was I was actually dancing. I was not particularly looking forward to just another night of dancing and aimless conversation, so I perked up when I saw Ashlar. Any night spent in her company with her was getting the reputation of being out of the ordinary. She was however feeling poorly and asked me what time I was planning on going back home. Sensing that she really wanted to go back home and knowing that she would not do so until somebody offered to accompany her and wanting to get a bit of sleep before my scheduled 5:30 am departure from Antigua to Xela, I insisted on walking her home.
After almost 4 weeks I had finally developed some sense of orientation and I found my way pretty instantly. Our route took us past the largest supermarket in town, where I buy my chocolate coins as a snack during break time at my placement. Tonight however in the lit ambience of the supermarkets courtyard, a homeless person had found temporary refuge and was inspecting a wound on the sole of his foot. Ashlar immediately took pity on the man, approaching and asking him if there was any way she could help him. Hearing the man ask for some socks, she immediately promised the man that we would be back in 15 to 20 minutes. Still feeling unwell, but doing her best to move past her pain, we rushed back. She was already deeply in thought on what else she could offer the man and discussing her plans out loud with me. I could offer her no practical guidance, just moral support. Grabbing a goody bag with 2 pairs of socks, water, blankets and some money she pushed back to where the man had promised to wait for us.
Dissapointingly for her, the man was nowhere to be seen once we had returned. Despite our inability to help the man, her spontaneous and unprovoked altuism certainly moved me. You do not see this often and that fact that it came from Ashlar certianly demonstrates that Casa Shekina certainly has some multi dimensional and multi layered, complicated human beings. the fact that certain people are so unique and special that no label can stick them and they are simply their own person.
3. Globalisation in Guatemala
I was inspired to write this section by various amusing coincidences over the past 4 days. The exact moment that inspired me can be found in an internet cafe in Xela which charged 3 quetzales or around 40 cents per hour of using the hour. It was a small place where men came in to internet date using Skype, one on my left and the other on my right. The Internet was also somewhat shifty, and not all internet pages would load, while at times it would simply refuse to work, leading me to ask the manager to fix it, which he did by muttering and banging on the computer.
What stunned me however was how at one point the radio which was been played throughout the cafe put on a song by Serebro, a Russian girl band who had faded from prominence after participating in the 2007 Eurovision Song Contest, and trying to reverse that, have released videos and songs of them fooling around in cars and planes. Their latest had bombed in Russia but was being played over the radio in Guatemala.
And it was not just that. Several days before, trying to find Atlas Shrugged in Antigua, I had been walking around town when I suddenly found myself walking behind a Guatemalan boy wearing a sport jacket with "RUSSIA" emblazoned on the back. Moments later just after I entered a bookstore, I located 2 books in Greek. Since this particular establishment was selling used books, its collection reflected the clientele that had visited it. One book was a greek translation of the spiritual teachings of some Indian guru, while the other was a greek edition of the 'Hobbit'.
Considering the fact that I have also met many people of Russian descent but who could not speak Russian, it is remarkable how without actually having met someone from Greece or Russia here, I have seen signs of their influence and their mark. Since very few tourists from these countries visit Guatemala, it is somewhat good to know that at least such sparsely represented groups in Guatemala are leaving almost like artifacts for those who follow. Something to find and remind yourself where you're from and why you left.
4. Teamwork, political correctness and emotional intelligence
A big part of working in a team I find is to be able to judge what people's pet peeves and do your best to avoid them lest you want to cause permanent friction and conflict. A case in point would be Rachel, a volunteer that triumphantly refuses any label,is witty, rejects the use of social networking sites and is intensely passionate about politics and the life in general in the United States.
I pride myself on staying informed about current world affairs and since the US is one of the more prominent countries in terms of stature and coverage that it receives in the world media, I stay up to date with the news there with particular attention. I also particularly enjoy talking with others about their countries in general and talking with Rachel was especially interesting.
It was on casual morning, Tuesday morning I think it was, when carrying some wood that me and Rachel got talking about politics in the US. The conversation led us to Occupy Wall Street at which point I commented about the perceived failure of those protests due to a lack of concrete goals that were shared by all the protesters. After that it quickly went downhill. I was unable to find common points with her and the tone became heightened and very serious. Personally I had no principles to defend but I was alarmed by how passionately Rachel defended her point of view for I had never before been in such an intense debate. In an misplaced attempt to lower the tone of the debate, I attempted to make a joke first through physical slapstick and then by commenting how serious Rachel's face was in response to her demand to know what was so funny. Evidently I failed since she stormed off and refused to speak with me for the rest of the day. Ultimately we both got over it and were able to keep working together effectively and productively.
In another instance at the end of a productive day I arm wrestled with Freddy and was able to secure a draw, which for me was a success, considering his superior strength, with my only advantage being my sheer stubborness. In my sheer joy I exclaimed that my feat was similar to that of Stalingrad. I was promptly crashed to the ground as both Rachel and Robert, a 27 year old Brit and a great construction worker, both stated that my exclamation was offensive. Speaking to them I understood that our associations with the term were vastly different. Whereas Rachel and Robert solely associated Stalingrad with Stalin and his evil deeds throughout his reign, my association is with the battle of WW2 and the extraordinary bravery and tenacity shown by the typical Soviet soldier and in no way was glorifying Stalin or his deeds. I had aslo referred to Stalingrad in particular because I hoped to avoid offending anyone by not mentioning the history of other countries, just my own. I had failed however in part because Robert, a history enthusiast, knew little about Britain's involvement in WW2, but had formed a strong opinion on Stalin. In this case any tension was resolved immediately in a mature way.
There are many other cases which I have witnessed as well where supposedly harmless jokes cause offence. Now, whenever Rachel is talking about the US, I keep my mouth shut and when refering to history in a humorous fashion, will now only mention ancient history because good relations with my coworkers will always be more important than a silly joke or the need to explain my views on subjects that I do not have a strong stance in.
5. Names, names, names
I have received multiple names, nicknames and aliases since my arrival in Guatemala. They're usually accompanied by a funny story so I will list them all here. I like accumulating all these names simply because my name is so adjustable depending on where I'm living, meaning I have lived with several versions of given name, Dmitry, based on where I live.
Red/White Russian
As I've mentioned before this has been used as a nickname due to my occassional sun burns and the colour sun cream creates. Since I have bought SPF 50, I do not usually apply a lot and sometimes I get areas of skin with a thick layer of sun cream giving me the nickname White Russian. I also had a very pale skin tone on my arrival, particularly compared to Freddy's who having worked in construction in some capacity or another has accumulated a very dark brown tone. Have recently also been using Red Russian(Ruso Rojo) to introduce myself to the kids at the school where I'm volunteering at. Red Russian is also used by Freddy because he claims that my face goes bright red whenever we arm wrestle and how Russians are associated with being angry. Angry=red.
Cleopatro
Name introduced by Willy in one of the Spanish classes. He says inspiration came to him suddenly. Others associate with me being a diva in class. Me; I like it.
Extraterrestre
Spanish word for alien. Mentioned in class how I sometimes feel like an alien amongst other people and how I/m afraid of aliens even though I don't think they exist. Alex later went further with this nickname and called me an alien several times in class to great comical effect. That's why I liked the guy and appreciated him. He knew how to make fun of me the right way while at the same time boosting my reputation for being different to others.
Ruso
Russian in Spanish. SInce there are so few Russians around(really nobody except me) this nickname has proved a very good way of identifying me to others in Guatemala.
Plutarco
Another of Willy's creations. Taken after a famous greek historian I feel like it conveys my wisdom. I also have a slight suspicion that Willy associates it with talking too much and hogging the spotlight when I was in his Spanish class.
Geovanni
The past weeks I have been unable to keep up with all the new arrivals in the house and have not introduced myself to several of them. One Sunday eveningone of the new girls, Hunter, a girl with which I avoid hanging out, entered my room while me and my roomate were inside. Turning to me she wondered out loud what my name was. She started out with "Geeee..." at which point my roommate decided to give her a helping hand and finished in questioning tone "Geovanni?". I burst out laughing and decided against correcting Aaron, my roomamte and to go along with it. I have always been looking for a credible alias I could use and now I have found one. In fact, while in Monterrico, I used that name with a Guatemalan who mentioned how one of his dreams was to travel to Siberia and live with the indigenous nomadic tribes that live there; the Chuckchi. A fine gem in my collection of names.
