I’m not what I would consider a bubbly person….. (although I’ve had my moments). I don’t usually laugh out loud when reading a book or watching TV. Yet, I smile, I can be friendly, I joke and get excited often - but I’m not an excitable person. Some might even go so far as to call me serious.
However, when it comes to travel, I get this bursting feeling of excitement running through my veins. I can’t control it. Even when I’m not thinking about it, it’s still humming through me just waiting for my thoughts to wonder onto its path again – which happens often. I guess you could say it happens as much as a guy thinks about sex! It fizzles in my stomach and my skin begins to tingle, my heart beats faster and I can’t sit still – it takes every ounce of strength that I have to stop the verbal diarrhea of “OMG I WANT TO GO HERE AND I HAVE TO THIS AND I WANT TO DO IT NOW NOW NOW NOW!!!”
It is the ultimate distraction and time waster. I have spent unmentionable hours scrutinizing maps, studying travel guides, staring at photos with a contented grin, planning trips and writing LISTS and LISTS of all the places I have been and want to go (it’s seriously long enough to be a book…..) and the list just gets longer as I travel, not shorter, as I hear about other hidden gems.
I think too much… I really do. (Those who know me will be subconsciously nodding furiously as they read this!). I always fret about human nature being disappointing, things not going the way I had written in my life script, how my actions may be perceived by others etc and its EXHAUSTING. But that’s me. *Insert traffic lights and an On/Off switch in brain now*
But when I’m travelling (with my fiancé), none of that matters. It’s like a sense of peace and calm resonates within my mind (with the excitement still bubbling under the surface of course) and everything that nature and this earth have to offer makes all the bullshit worth enduring. Other than those special people in my life that I love and adore – travel is my ultimate passion. The only stress that my passion forces upon me (other than the stresses of being in-transit) is the panicked feeling that I won’t have enough time or money to see and do it all.
I want children, and I’ve reached that time in my life when I want them now, but that mean’s that my passion has to be put on hold – for about 15 to 20 years. YIKES!!!! I know I can still travel with children, but no longer will there be 3-6 month long trips and having total freedom. It’ll be more like –“can we afford this, 3 weeks will be too long for the kids, they won’t sit still for a 30 hour flight, have you packed everything we need? Don’t forget her favourite teddy bear!, Mum I need to go toilet, Dad I’m hungry, Oh dear, he’s going to be sick, No don’t touch that!, Muuuuuuum I’M BORED!.....”
I am ready to accept this sacrifice as I know my children will become a deeper love, but I will never stop yearning. I keeping thinking about spending 3 months in Africa (the one continent I haven’t touched after our Asia trip, if you don’t count Egypt) but realistically we’ll have to wait until the kids have moved out of home, or if we shortened the trip, we could maybe go for a 2 months at the end of the school year…. But even that would be 10 years or so away. The thought physically pains me. (There I go again, over-thinking!)
I can understand going to the Pacific Islands or Australia/New Zealand for a few weeks holiday as it’s only just over the ditch, maybe even Asia and the States, but Europe or Africa – for only a few weeks?! Are you mad?! If you’re in France, you might as well go next door to Italy, ooh and if you’re in Italy you might as well go check out Switzerland and then ooh ooh ohh…..! Before you know it, you’ve got a 3 months trip mapped out. Any less would be a waste of such a long and expensive flight! It’s going to take a long time to condition my mind out of doing this…. A holiday is literally going to be just that – a holiday, not travelling, which long term, becomes a way of life.
I guess the benefit of holidays is everything will always be new and exciting. That’s one thing that you end up loosing when you’ve been on the road for a long time. “I’m in Argentina at the moment but I’m going to Brazil tomorrow” all blasé like. It really does become a way of life – the excitement of where you are and what you are doing just becomes a constant state of mind to the point where it just becomes normal. Yes I’m in South America, so what?! Why wouldn’t I be? Ummmm because most normal people have jobs, kids, mortgage payments or are studying...….. Responsibilities… yep and that’s exactly what I’m signing up for.
I want the husband, the house, the dream job, the dog, the kids and the damn white picket fence (not literally) and that’s where my life will be in the next few years. Wow, that bubbling feeling of excitement chorusing through me feels familiar! (Sorry if my happiness is making you sick, get over it, here’s a bucket).
Travel, it looks like you have to share…. If only we could have it all!!