Adventures in Africa

Valentine’s Day 2008 is one crazy day I’ll never forget!
Joseph, the man who ran the Kenyan orphanage I was volunteering in, burst in saying “Crystal, will you accompany me on a short journey?” By this point, I had learned that a “short” outing could mean anything from a couple of hours to a full day’s adventure. Begging the other volunteers not to leave me alone, we made our way to Christine’s home for tea. Christine became my Kenyan grandma and I always enjoyed our lively conversations. However, after greeting us today, Christine disappeared. Half an hour later, she rushed back in with a boiling pot of chai. She apologized for the wait, explaining that she was out of milk, and had sent her son to milk the cow! This was the freshest cup of tea I’ve ever had!
Already two hours into our “short journey,” we went to a local school. After greeting the principal, we were paraded through the classrooms. After introducing us, Joseph announced that I would perform a song. This happened all the time, so luckily I had my Hippo song ready: “Hip, Hip, Hip, Hippopotamus, Hip, Hip Hooray God made all of us.”
We continued into Dagoretti, where Joseph steered us into the back of a butchery for a lunch of ugali and cow innards. Luckily it also came with Fanta to wash the cornmeal paste and bones down with!
We made our way to an open-air slaughterhouse. The sign posted on the door read ‘If you are entering this yard in the morning wear goggles and apron to avoid blood spatter.’ Lucky for us it was afternoon. Through that stained white gate, at least half a dozen decapitated cows hung from the ceiling. Each butcher was in charge of selling meat from his own cow, meaning chaos ensued as everyone fought to have us buy from their cow. Joseph explained to ‘order’ the meat, all you had to do was point to the part of the cow you wanted, and the butcher would hack it off with a machete. It was a struggle, but eventually I heard myself say, “I’ll take that bit” As the butcher raised his machete, another man appeared beside me. “Excuse me, miss.” He asked, “I was wondering if you would be my Valentine?” just as the butcher dropped the chunk of raw meat into my bare hands.
Eight hours and 12 valentine requests after our “short journey” began, we made it back to the orphanage to eat a feast of beef and stale pink cupcakes with my hands still reeking of dead cow. While this may not have been a very romantic day, I’m sure no other Valentine’s Day will ever be quite as memorable!