About chaela7
Melbourne Cup Races
There's always an "about you" section in every profile anyone's ever written. Off to the side there's usually some small gray scale print to help you get the words flowing. It goes a little something like "Who are you? Tell the world who you are and what you stand for." Well here it is...
I don't know who I am.
Believe me, I tried to figure it out. I stared at my computer screen for over an hour and still fell short of a single word. I had to fill up my cup of coffee twice, hoping that the walk to the kitchen would yield a little more inspiration. It didn't. So I thought, 'How would I introduce myself to someone?' I racked my brain. Well... I'd start off by saying: 'my name is Chaela, and I grew up in California. That's where I studied Wine and Viticulture at university, and afterward I moved to Australia.
But I wasn't satisfied. That's what I've done, and sure, those things have shaped who I am, but it still doesn't answer the question of 'who am I?' Back to the drawing board. Well, I thought, what do I want to do in my life? I want to see the world, I want to help others, I want to be successful, I want to go back to school... The list could go on. I want all of these things for my future, but does what the future may or may not hold, have anything to do with who I am now?
And there it was, now. Who am I right now, in the present, in this moment? A light bulb went off above my head. And the funny thing is that this moment, no matter how sweet, is always eluding me. It's a who am I paradox. Who am I now, if now never really exists? Okay, okay, I'm getting a bit carried away with the philosophical now situation. But the truth is that I don't know who I am right now because I'm never exactly the same person from one day to the next. My mind changes with the wind (anyone who knows me, knows how painfully true that statement is). At this point in my life, I'm still figuring out the answer for myself. There's no way I could neatly package who I am in a little box with a 500-word count.
I've heard that the best thing about traveling is finding the ability to lose yourself. So I'm content with not knowing who I am right now. Because while I embark on this journey, it's not about being me, it's about surrendering myself to the unknown and just being. Letting go. If I already knew exactly who I was, I would deprive myself the excitement of discovering who I am.
My Travel Map:
