Wanderlust Going forth into the big, wide world and setting it on fire.

I left Chiang Mai on cloud 9, also known as Nakornchai Air's VIP night bus. I wish someone had told me about this bus before.  It had reclining leather seats, personal tv screens with some pretty decent English speaking movies, a game control pad and they serve you nice little snack with beverages. They made no random stops in the middle of the night, they didn't play awful B movies on a constant rotation, they didn't wake us up at 1 am to get food at some insanely expensive bus stop half way to Bangkok. It was the best. The only complaint I had was that it was FREEZING.  They kept the temp at a ridiculous 21-22 degrees Celsius, but I think this was to help the driver stay awake. Still, even with the arctic temps, I was able to get some decent shut eye thanks to the handy dandy little blanket they provided. I think it was the best $24 I spent for transportation to date.

Anyway, the bus arrived in Bangkok little after 7am the next day and I checked into Lub-d again.  I had a couple days to burn before my Thai visa expired and since I didn't know when I would be back in Thailand, I decided to do those last few touristy things I didn't do on my previous trips to Bangkok.  So the first thing I did was book a tour to the floating market the next day.  

Now, I'm sure everyone has seen those pictures of the boats laden with ware float down a narrow waterway alongside several other boats.  Well, I had to see it for myself...sadly, it wasn't that great. I think, as most things goes, once something becomes a tourist attraction, the thing loses its essence. To me, the whole experience reminded me of Disneyland, but not in the "the happiest place in the world" kinda way.

First, you have to get to the floating market, which is located about an hour and a half outside of Bangkok. Having booked the tour, I got there in a minivan.  It was sorta like riding Mr. Toad's Wild Ride.  The driver was weaving in and out of traffic, dangerously tailing cars all in an effort to make up for the time we lost waiting for the tour guides to pull their heads out of their butts and get us all organized.

Thankfully, we got to the floating market in one piece. We were pointed in the direction of the boat boarding area and told that we would have to pay extra for the boat ride through the canals and it would take about 45 minutes. Fine. I paid the money and got on board.  There was even a guy there taking picture of the passengers as they boarded. Once the boat was full, which didn't take long at all, we took.  Much like the Pirates of the Caribbean ride, our boat weaved around this and that and occasionally, bit the boat in front of us.  Ok, not occasionally, often.  See, I got the boat lady who figured out it was best to cruise through the canals at mach 3 speed so she could dump us at the pier again and pick up more passengers, and that's exactly what she did.  She plowed that boat into the boat ahead of us at least a half a dozen times before that boat lady let us pass. We only stopped at a couple stalls, and I think this was only because they were friends of our 'capitan.'  I think the whole thing last 30 minutes and half of that time was just going through the 'residential area.'  When she dropped us off at the same place she picked us up, there was another woman there telling us we HAD to give her a tip.  Um...I don't think so.  Also, that man taking pictures of passengers that I mentioned earlier?  Well, he apparently put our pictures on some cheesy souvenir plate and was trying to sell it for some lame price. He was less than pleased when I nor the old man sitting next me, bought our plate. Told ya it was like Disneyland...

Well, that "excursion" lasted half a day and on the way back to Bangkok, in my very broken Spanglish, I spoke to the old man at length.  Apparently, he was from Argentina and didn't speak one lick of English. I couldn't even begin to imagine how the difficulties he had traveling.  Anyhow, he asked me if I wanted to go on the ferry and see some of the temples and sites.  Since I didn't have anything else planned, I agreed and we caught the ferry up the Chao Praya river.  Having already visited Wat Arun, I decided to visit Chinatown and some of the other places that I missed before.  The old man was nice enough.  Though we had some issues when it came time to eat.  Apparently, from what I was able to gather, he didn't eat noodles, rice, fruit or vegetables nor anything he didn't recognize. Basically, he only ate meat and grilled meat at that.  Well, I thought, meat on a stick can be found all over the place.  Uh...wrong. We got to Chinatown and most of the food stalls were shut down. Someone said it had something to do with Buddha day and everyone was at home with their families or something. So we looked and looked. I tried to stop and eat at a couple noodles stalls, but he wouldn't let me. Finally, starving and seeing red, I found a meat on a stick vendor. I walked over, selected four little itty bitty kebabs and placed them on the grill. And wouldn't ya know it, the bleepity bleep man, took them. What is it with people always wanting to take my food???? This isn't the first time that this has happened while traveling. I just can't believe it!  He didn't get his own, he didn't want his own, he wanted mine. Now, I'm not sure what my picking them out had to do with it, but he mumbled something about wanting to eat them and he so he took them.  He took them all, gave me two and ate the rest.  Yes, I could have grabbed more and placed them on the grill, but having told the guy that I was starving and I needed food numerous times in the last two hours, I lost it just a little bit. The tour was done; I was leaving.  I started heading back to the pier, muttering the entire time that I was starving and I needed to eat, amongst other things. Before you think there may have been something lost in translation, let me just tell you, I know how to say "I need food" in Spanish. Besides, he understood me.

We caught one of the last ferries back to the skytrain station and headed in the direction of the hotel, at which point I ditched him unceremoniously and went to Siam Paragon to get a salad at the Gourmet Market (like Whole Foods, but better). Ahh...everything was right in the world again.

The next day I went to Ayutthya.  Since I didn't have such a stellar time on the tour the day before, I decided to forgo the tour and get their on my own.  I took a train and then hired a tuk tuk to take me to all the temples in the area.  People told me that Ayutthya is almost like Angkor Wat in Cambodia and they were right. Ruins after ruins is all you see.  I took pictures of each place I visited, but couldn't tell you which is which. I did manage to take a picture of the buddha head in the tree.  That turned out to be disappointing as well. The pictures I've seen made it appear much larger than it really is.  Darn photoshop!

The last thing on my agenda was the Bridge Over the River Kwai. Due to ever so clever planning, I had scheduled my last few days in Bangkok over the weekend just so I could take the special train that goes directly to Katchanaburi and over the bridge that the Death Railway traveled. I should mention upfront, I never saw the movie and know almost nothing about the bridge..  All I do know is that a bunch of people died while building it and the author of the book, which was made into a movie, got the bridge wrong.  But I wanted to see it anyway and honestly, I did plan on reading the book prior to taking the trip out there, I just never got around to it.

The train left the station at 5:30am on Sunday morning and it was 3rd class all the way. But I met this nice friendly couple who always made sure I got off the train and on the train whenever we stopped.  The train ride out was pleasant enough. You get to see the countryside and it makes stops along the way. We stopped at a temple shortly after leaving Bangkok and I got to listen to a morning prayer and the monks chanting. That was nice.  I don't remember the last time I got up early enough to get to a morning church service.

We got to the bridge a little after 12:30pm and we had a few minutes to walk across it, as well as take some pictures. We then went to the waterfalls for a little. People brought food or bought lunches and had picnics while we waited for the return train.  Some also went swimming in the pool at the base of the waterfall. It looked a little sketchy, if you ask me, but whatever...

The return train picked us up a little after 2:30 and made one brief stop at a WWII cemetery before heading back to Bangkok. I wish I could say the train ride back was just as pleasant as the one in the morning, but it wasn't. Watching the sunset over the countryside was nice, but the multiple, unscheduled stops made the trip a drag. We got back an hour later than scheduled and my butt hurt from the hard, uncushioned seat. We pulled into the station well after 8pm and I hurried back to the hotel to pack.

All in all, my last few days in Bangkok were fine. While it didn't end on a high note, like I had hoped, it wasn't completely terrible. But I definitely won't be going back for a while.