So its taken a while to get online… and if you’ve been salivating with anticipation for the journalistic genius coming you’re way then read on. If not and you only clicked on the link by mistake then sign off and no hard feelings (bear in mind, however, that there will be a pop quiz on my return so I can see who my real friends are).
Chapter 1: Tokyo Drift.
The story starts in Tokyo, a truly crrrazy place. A holiday before the holiday I guess. Anyone thinking about going, I strongly recommend it… anyone not thinking about going, start thinking! It is definitely a place that tests your tourist skills to the max, where you can easily go a whole day without seeing another white person (expect to be stared at like some sort of celebrity anywhere outside of the main business area- I convinced myself it was due to my rakish good looks) but Tokyo is, in my opinion, well worth the effort.
Our journey here was far from smooth, with a 5hour wait on the runway at Heathrow (owing to fuel pouring out of the wing while we taxied for take off) that was broken only by the offering of a tasty and nutritious pot noodle! Good old BA!
We arrived early in the morning and immediately experienced the total lack of English language speakers (even at the tourist office, where their basic GCSE level grasp of English put them head and shoulders of the rest of the population). Our communication in Japan was limited to amateur charades and pointing at symbols in our phrase book! Ordering from menus was a challenge and the strategy we used to overcome this was either Russian roulette (again pointing to a series of random symbols on the menu) or scanning the room for a tasty looking dish on someone’s table and ordering 2 of the same!
Highlights in Tokyo included the fish market (a 6am excursion that is well worth the effort). Unfortunately I lost my camera soon after this (my only lost item so far before anyone mutters typical under their breath) so images have been stolen from the web to give you an idea of the variety, chaotic energy and intensity of the market. You are not officially allowed into the market itself but intrepid tourists as we are, we (ashamedly) feigned ignorance and strolled straight in! Ian got sprayed by some fish blood and I was almost knocked out by a giant flying tuna but it was an ace morning. We followed that up by a monster breakfast, best described as Death by Sushi… I don’t think Ian will ever be able to look at another piece of fish without feeling queezy!
Another definite highlight was Yoyogi, a large park not dissimilar to Clapham Common in size. That, however, is where the similarity ends… instead of relaxed banter, heavy drinking and unashamed laziness the Japanese are the most productive park users I have ever seen. Activities included dancing (of all sorts except breakdancing- Ian was almost in tears after a full afternoon of searching), singing, music, painting, martial arts, samurai, theatre, kite flying, free hugging (a bizarre obsession, which involves dressing in any number of ridiculous outfits and giving out free hugs to anyone and everyone), photography, football, dog showing, poetry recitals, cycling and juggling. Interestingly, each activity was pursued in individual areas of the park so that all the dancers were together, as were all the martial artists etc etc. The list is by no means exhaustive but what seemed missing was laughter and banter!! In fact the latter observation goes for my general impression (limited as it is by the small amount of time I have had to form it) of Japan. They do seem to be a very rigid and highly strung bunch which seems to preclude genuine unrestrained fun!
Apart from all the above, shopping is definitely a favourite pastime of the Japanese, a passion shared by Ian “I’m so street it hurts” Powis. I have never known anyone (male or female) so happy to spend hours and hours in shoe shops (I’m trying to say that without the slightest hint of impatience but it was like shopping with a male J-Lo).
The constant search for cool is a massive obsession of the young Japanese (and Ian), starting in the heaving shopping districts and ending in the bars and clubs. These are filled with unbelievably hip folks who spend more time preening in front of the toilet mirrors in one night than I have in my entire life (maybe I should learn a lesson from that??). They make Rindo and Ched look like a pair of humble hobos! There are official queuing systems to get a drink and very few people dance, preferring to stand in lines in front of the dj booth bopping gently! Needless to say myself and Ian were considerably less restrained and although Ian was a massive hit, I did my best to neutralise anything he did to make us look cool with a unique dance style I like to call ‘embarrassing uncle at wedding’. Ian was convinced we were ‘killing’ the dance floor but I think this may have been because he was concentrating too much on his own dancing to notice me!!! We did manage to get in a battle with a Japanese crew, which ended when they all took their tops off and starting hugging us! Exit needed!!!
Our time in Tokyo was split by a visit to the mountains to get some snowboarding in where we met an Australian spider-man impersonator and stayed in some traditional Japanese accommodation complete with tatami mats and paper screens. The trip was completed by après ski Japanese style: a relaxing onsen (hot spring bath) followed by some saki and yakitori (an eastern answer to tapas) and a journey home on the Shinkansen (bullet train) which truly lives up to its reputation.
Our return to Tokyo included more failed attempts at navigation (there are no street names anywhere in Tokyo and the numbering system applied to addresses is impossible to decipher. Ally that with the fact that nothing is written in a remotely understandable or memorable language and you can understand why our navigation strategy was to stand looking at a map on a street corner ‘till someone took pity and helped us out. This never took long and we would simply point to where we wanted to go to and more often than not the good samaritan would walk with us till we reached our desired destination, even if it meant them walking a considerable distance out of their way- the Japanese really are the nicest most helpful bunch of people you can possibly imagine.), a meeting with Frank Sinatras trombonist, more outrageous shape throwing on the dance floors, drinks in the 35th floor apartment of a Japanese comedian singer who wanted to show us the ‘view from his balcony’ (we didn’t stay long!!!) and more great value, great tasting meals out. Actually, despite its reputation to the contrary, we found Tokyo to be a well priced city where food, accommodation and shopping all offer refreshing value for money! We’ve definitely been taking advantage of the strong pound- love you Gordon!!!
Overall, Japan is an extremely intriguing place. Its culture is interesting for such marked differences to Western Culture while maintaining an almost sycophantic obsession with its Western financial equal. There is no way you can ever witness such willing adherence to societies rules and regulations anywhere I have been in Europe or America. Nobody crosses the road on a red man, no-one eats or drinks on the street, there is virtually no crime and even the homeless remove their shoes before stepping onto the mats on which they live. Despite the strongly unique identity of Japanese culture, English language maintains a powerful role in advertising, the currency of Western celebrity is unequalled and American urban clothing and music is the height of cool. People here display such great respect for each other (witness the mask wearing to protect others from your illness, the willingness and enthusiasm to help others- tourists included, the deference paid to elders and the quickness to apologise), that it really does provoke reflection over our own attitude to others. People are, however, forever plugged into phones, computer games or books wherever you look and there is very little interaction. I did find it a little uncomfortable to witness the solitude, rigidity and austerity that seems to be intrinsic with this rule abiding respectfull attitude.
I hope the above ranting has given you a tast of what Tokyo is like and what we got up to there… if so then you will no doubt be awaiting chapter two with baited breath!
Hope you enjoy some photos in the mean time… a more extensive selection is online at www.bjwuk.phanfare.com
Ben (and Ian).
