EnCounters and footSteps

...walked on water...

Have you ever been on the edge of something? An impassable limit or an insuperable threshold? Did you ever think you can’t go further?
And what did you do? Did you stand holding your breath or shy away?

There are two things I learned last summer:

1. Hoisting sails is best to be done facing head wind.

I was so fed up with Petrinja that I just wanted to leave and stay away from it! I didn’t like its streets rife with homeless dogs. I didn’t like its buildings blotched with bullet holes and cracks in their walls. I didn’t like its air thickened with dust and breezes of collapse, which turned into a head wind that constantly blew in my face and chased me away from here.
This is it. I like sailing near the wind but at some point I do have to admit that I can’t stand it anymore, that Ican't go any further.
So I left. And probably for the first time in my young live I realized that I had to admit a defeat. This town truly managed to overwhelm me. Not to chase me away though. I knew I would come back as giving in was never to be an option but how would I get up to this? How would I be able to stand that wind that I couldn’t face anymore? How can I come back in peace but not in capitulation?
I went on a sailing trip. The sea was calm most of the time but it slowly became more and more windy. The other day I couldn’t wait to hoist the sails – we had wind, sun, ocean and big boot with massive sails. What more would we need to go full speed ahead? But the captain said, 'First we have to turn to face the wind. It’s better and easier to hoist he sails in head wind.”
It was that moment when I thought, 'I have to go back to Petrinja and face its wind that I couldn’t stand anymore!
Where else could I better hoist my sails?!

2. If you want to walk on water, get out of the boat!
It’s not only my religion but my philosophy of live that there is always more to reach out for and to achieve. Sometimes you just confuse border and barriers, edges and ledges, limits and levels, peaks and pinnacles. Sometimes you can just jump over. Sometimes it’s not that easy and you have to pause or maybe even rest a little. Just until the wind shows its direction and you know how to adjust your sails. When to shorten, when to hoist and when to give full speed ahead.

And each tomorrow will find you further than today.