A couple of days into our stay in Mumbai I was waiting for
Diego outside a shop when a greasy Indian man came up to me.
Avoiding eye contact, he said: “You and me make the good
sex, yes? How much for the good sex?”
Brilliant. My first time being mistaken for a hooker happens
in Mumbai, of all places. I gave the man a look that screamed that I was most
definitely far too expensive for him and stomped off back to my hotel.
Mumbai is a riot of color, people, sounds and cultures. It’s
busy but laid-back; poor but distinctly middle class, beautiful but smelly all
at the same time. Decidedly more liberal than close-minded Delhi, I have loved
being able to wear above-the-knee dresses and not be visually undressed by
every Indian man on the street. Mumbai women are very on-trend and classy with
their colorful, tailored clothes and signature black glossy manes of hair. It’s
decidedly more expensive to eat, drink and stay here, but I think that might be
down to my recent habit of seeking out European gelato ice cream and expensive
Japanese restaurants. Yes, I feel like I have been cheating the backpacker’s
lifestyle slightly for the last week, but since I lost practically half my body
weight and burned my face off summiting Stok Kangri I have been able to
rationalize to myself the way I have been living it up in this huge,
cosmopolitan city.
We flew from Leh to Delhi after I decided I couldn’t handle
the 4 day, 20km an hour jeep ride alternative. From Delhi we caught the
Rajidhani Express night train south – and what an experience that was! Sleeping
opposite to a sweet little Sikh family, we put up with bloody religious Sikh
chanting all night played from tinny wee speakers. As if this wasn’t enough I
slept above a man who would definitely be in the running for World’s Most
Annoying Snorer. His three chins jiggled with every breath, and he slept with
his mouth slightly open all night long. I know this because I lay in my bunk
shooting daggers at him, silently thinking murderous thoughts. Oh yes, that
train was definitely an experience, and what’s even more exciting is that I get
to catch exactly the same one when I head back up to Delhi in two weeks! Oh,
happy days.
Our stay in Mumbai has been rather wonderful. We booked into
a gorgeous hotel because we felt we needed some TLC, and it has been one of the
most indulgent experiences I have had in a long time. G&T’s by the pool,
amazing food, workouts in their state of the art gym – bliss! I feel like we
have really got to know the city in our time here.
Our hotel is on Marine Drive, right on the water. At night
it’s known as the “queens necklace” as all the streetlights come on around the
bay, like a pearl necklace. A couple of days ago we took a tour round Mumbai’s
sights, which was eye-opening, to say the least! They included the “Indian Big
Ben” – rather underwhelming, hanging gardens with a giant version of The Old
Woman Who Lived in A Shoe boot, Malabar Hill with a view across Chowpatty
Beach, the house where Ghandi used to live (so cool !!) and the Washing Laundry
where over 50,000 people have their clothes hand washed everyday – just mind
blowing. Along this tour we were confronted with some of the worst poverty and
slums I have ever seen. Think Slumdog Millionaire, but so much worse. I still
can’t get over seeing a massive slum, then right next door to it is a branch of
McDonalds. If that doesn’t illustrate India’s gap between rich and poor, I
really don’t know what does.
One rather uninspired idea of mine was to visit India’s only
water park – Water Kingdom, about a 1.5hour taxi from central Mumbai. In my
head I thought Wet N Wild, offering slides, pools and some lovely respite from
the heat. However, I should have thought this through more. I couldn’t wear a
bikini of course, so I wore some lycra running tights and a singlet. I think I
could have worn a garbage bag and I still would have attracted some of the most
lewd and suggestive stares and gestures that I have experienced in all of
India. The water park would have been probably 80% men, and some tall white
blonde chick was a definite novelty. I lasted about an hour before wanting to
go back to the comfort of the hotel, with a rather more realistic view on what
an Indian water park was actually like. Won’t be making that mistake again!
Tomorrow we are off on the overnight train down to Goa, an
old hippy beach paradise. The Goan fish curries are rather famous in India, as
are the Bang Lassis (no, I’m not going to describe what they are). I have a
good book and I’m planning to chill out for the last two weeks of my Indian
odyssey, before I head to Nepal to see Bikram and catch up with mum.
I’m rather sorry there are no death-defying summits or war
zone stories in this blog, they are much more fun to write about and I’m sure
make for much better reading!
