the road to serendipity

to be continued...

shix — Wed, 5 Nov 2008 21:10:00 GMT

the adventures of my wandering being, that is.

leaving behind an experience of a lifetime. being on my own in an unfamiliar territory, both within and beyond, has been an unforgettable experience, one that is too complex to be put in words and one that will be etched in memory.

i'm already craving for the next adventure.

now that i'm back, i know that it can only get better from this point onwards :)

"You know exactly what you left behind. What you don't know is what you'll discover when you get back." - Any Human Heart, William Boyd.

Cambodia 101

shix — Wed, 5 Nov 2008 20:47:00 GMT

I’m no expert on Cambodian life and culture but since I’ve been here for 2 months I feel I should let friends back home know a little more about the country and its quirks.

General

Cambodia has one of the most public holidays in the world. They have at least one public holiday every month, and if the holiday falls on a weekend, there is an extra day off on Monday. Plus they also celebrate Chinese AND Khmer New Year, the King’s, King Father’s and King Mother’s birthdays, and international days such as International Women’s Day and International Human Rights Day amongst many other holidays.
Public electricity is very expensive here and power cuts are really common. Most businesses and more wealthy households have to resort to private (and more expensive) sources of electricity powered by generators.
There is no developed public transport network in Cambodia. People mostly get around in motos, bicycles, tuk tuks, and the wealthier in cars. Only when traveling between provinces do people use travel buses or shared vans (packed like sardines!!).
There isn’t any legal enforcement on the minimum age to ride a moto. You could be 11 and be riding your moto to school, parking free! No problemo.

Lifestyle

Khmers dress conservatively. In the punishing heat, it is not surprising to see men and women in long sleeves or even jackets. At the beach, the women take dips in the water fully clothed in their tees and pants. I’ve been getting curious (and sometimes rude) stares from the locals at the beach and was even asked if I was local, which does make me feel conspicuous. This is changing, however, with the younger generation as girls are becoming more “westernized” and dress more liberally.
Traditionally, Khmer women do not sit cross-legged when seated on the floor, especially not in the presence of monks or even the male members of the family at home.
Local TV stations end their programs about 11pm with a national anthem and video that looks like it was made in the 1960s. And, the last scene in the video shows masked and armed soldiers practicing in combat training (looks a lot like guerilla warfare) and then it cuts abruptly to a blue screen (?!?!). You would think warfare is the last thing they wanna see before they go to bed after all that has happened.
It is not uncommon to remove your shoes before entering a house or even some shops.

Food

MSG (lots of it) is added to the food here. Apparently it kills the bacteria in the food.
Tap water is not fit for consumption.
Khmer food is not as spicy as Thai food or bland as Vietnamese food, but somewhere in between the two. They are big on their own versions of coconut curries, soups and stir-fried dishes called lok-lak. You also get lotsa fruit shakes at all eateries and they’re all really thick and yummy from all the coconut milk and condensed milk. I’ve had more shakes than I can count!
Due to French legacy, baguette is really common here but they’re only a foot long like those you find in Vietnam, but tastes better.

Killing Fields & Tuol Sleng

shix — Wed, 5 Nov 2008 19:51:00 GMT

Spent my last day in Cambodia visiting the infamous Killing fields of Choeung Ek and the Tuol Sleng Genocide Museum.

I'd deliberately left these two places till the very end even though I'd spent so much time in Phnom Penh over the past two months, partly because I knew it would be a scene difficult to digest, and also because I felt that it would be a good way to end this journey, coming to terms with what this country had been through 30 years ago and how far the locals have come.

The Killing Fields was one of the many mass graves sites during the Khmer Rouge era where thousands were brought from the Tuol Sleng detention centre to be massacred. A stupa containing the skulls of the 8985 corpses found here has been erected near the entrance, a poignant sight for anyone. I've never seen a real human skull before this and the sight of all these skulls and bones stacked on top one another was quite unbearable, especially knowing that these were innocent human beings who did not deserve any of this. These bones were found from the 86 of the 129 mass graves which have been unearthed. As you walk by each dug up grave, it's easy to see that all are far too small to be the burial ground for hundreds of people slaughtered and flung into them. On the muddy paths you can still see remnants of the victims' bones and they serve as a painful reminder that no human being should ever be treated this way.

Tuol Sleng (aka S21) was an even harder one to fathom. Previously a high school, it had been converted into a detention and torture centre for an estimated 17,000 people. The 1 km²compound contained 4 main buildings which served as torture rooms and cells. Building A was the most disturbing. The rooms contained the torture instruments, iron beds and chains left in place since 1979, and to make it even more unsettling, a photograph of the victim who had been found chained to that very bed in that very same room when the Vietnamese came to liberate the camp. Blood stains can even be seen in some of these rooms. Building C was extremely haunting - barbed wires had been installed on all the corridor balconies to prevent desperate prisoners from committing suicide. Imagine having your freedom so restricted that you couldn't even end your life in a way you had control over. In each room, brick and wooden single cells had been built and it was very dark and eerie. You can almost hear the victims wailing in silence as you walk through the dark and narrow walkways.

Walking through S21 reminded me of Auschwitz - how countless innocent people were detained and tortured, and finally sent for mass execution. These two cannot (and should not) be compared in terms of the atrocities and number of victims claimed as both were no less evil than the other, and any human life taken in this manner is just totally unnecessary. One just wonders how anybody could do this to a fellow human being. These places serve as painful reminders to mankind that such beastly behaviour should never be repeated, but sadly enough it's still going on everyday today in our world.

2 more days in Kampuchea

shix — Mon, 3 Nov 2008 22:28:00 GMT

Had a rude awakening this morning at 830am when my fellow volunteer banged on my door. I had fallen asleep from sheer exhaustion without setting my alarm!!! I was supposed to leave at 830 to the bus station (bus departing at 9am) but here I was just woken up! The next 10 minutes was sheer madness as I washed up, packed my remaining stuff and said my goodbyes. But what made it extra special was the kid (who has become one of my favourites too) who had hugged me when I first arrived was there to give me a hug just before I left. Hate the fact that I could have a leisurely morning to pack and then hang with the children, but oh well...

After I arrived in Phnom Penh and checked into my guesthouse I went in search of Friends, a restaurant which trains former street children. I think luck was on my side as Mr My-money-is-all-gone-so-can-you-give-me-some-money ass of a guy (yep the guy that conned me the previous time) came up to me from behind and used the same opening line, "Hi, do you speak English?" I turned around and once I saw his face I immediately told him to F* off. I've never really sworn at anybody to their face but this guy just had it coming. I then proceeded to tell him off and asked him sarcastically, "Oh was your bag ripped open and you lost your passport and money?" He immediately turned on his heels. Actually if I had a 2nd chance I would play along with him and in turn ask him for money for drugs. That should be fun to watch. But it's good that I ran into him again and could tell him off.

I'll be home in 2 days. Not totally looking forward to it but at least I will be kept busy organizing an art exhibition for the kids. More information will be provided real soon. So please come and show your support!

Nobody said it was easy

shix — Mon, 3 Nov 2008 21:47:00 GMT

Yesterday was not an easy day for me. Being my last day at CCPP, everything I did took on an extra burden of knowing that I wouldn’t be doing that when I woke up the next day, which was hard as I’ve grown so used to filling up paints, sorting paintings, cleaning wounds for the children, and especially playing with them everyday for the past month. To make it even harder, knowing that it was my last day, the kids were especially affectionate and kept asking if I was returning to my country. It wasn’t easy answering them. I hate to leave and I wish I could stay on. Quietly I’ve made a resolution to come back, hopefully next year.

One of the kids absolutely broke my heart. He’s only 8 and my absolute favourite. I look forward to his kisses and hugs everyday and that would simply make my day. He’s always cheerful and would always jump into my arms or onto my back. We could hardly communicate due to the language barrier but smiles and hugs were enough. Knowing it was my last day,he refused to go home and just clung onto me. I persuaded him to go home but he just remained silent, head bowed down. His sister, who waited for him, got angry and left without him. It was only later when an older boy snapped at him that he turned around and walked away quietly, without saying goodbye. I watched him as he walked up the hill, wiping his tears with his sleeves as he walked on, occasionally turning around to look at me, but never waving goodbye. That immediately brought tears to my eyes. I’d never expected to become emotional but at that instant I knew this child had made an impact in my life. I don’t know if he would remember me a few months from now but I will never forget how his face lights up whenever he smiles, and that sight of him walking up the hill and disappearing around the corner.

Ended off the night with a nice dinner of khmer dishes with CCPP’s staff and some of the other people I’ve met in S’ville. Then it was back to the house to start the packing madness – I’m bringing back 60 paintings for an exhibition to raise funds for these kids back home this month, so I’m now returning home with even more bags then when I came. More information about the exhibition will be posted real soon. Please come to the exhibition now that you know of my exhibition. Do spread some love to these beach and street children!

Halloween!

shix — Sat, 1 Nov 2008 20:40:00 GMT

We don’t have the habit of celebrating Halloween at home so this year’s Halloween has been my first and probably the most special one I’d have in years to come. We volunteers had prepared a Halloween party for the kids, complete with handmade animal masks and candy cones, party hats, face paint, massive amounts of yummies and games. The kids were so happy and excited with one surprise after another and I had so much fun with them. It was amazing watching them go berserk with the water balloons and thrashing baby powder at one another. The volunteers weren’t spared as well and we all had white faces after that. I don't think my 1st halloween could be anymore special, thoroughly enjoyed it!

Kampot

shix — Tue, 28 Oct 2008 22:50:00 GMT

There're 2 public holidays this week (told ya there're hols every month in Cambodia) and so the centre is closed for 3 days. I made a trip to Kampot yesterday and stayed a night by the riverside.

Arrived in Kampot nice and early at 10am after the 2-hr bus ride from S'ville. Kampot is a quaint little town which seems to have been stuck in the past, which to me is really nice. French colonial buildings dot the street and you can't find any tall buildings here at all. The town is quite small and everywhere is within walk-able distance. The motodups (motorcycle drivers) and tuk tuk drivers are also less in-your-face. The whole time I was there I was only asked twice if I needed a moto ride. It also feels like the locals there are more soft spoken and genial. It's quite safe to walk around even at night, although there're hardly any street lamps.

I hired a tuk tuk and headed out to the rural countryside to one of the caves and pepper plantation. For the price of 20 USD for the trip, the people at the guesthouse wanted me to use a moto instead, but I politely refused, which turned out to be a wise choice as it was blistering hot at 1pm and started raining at 3. My driver could speak some English so he also acted as my guide. The White Elephant cave was alright, nothing spectacular but you get to see rock formations of a big and small elephant, rice fields and many bats. After climbing up and down the steep steps carved out of rocks, trying to prevent myself from slipping into the dark abyss below (an exaggeration, but u get the picture) and squeezing through crevices, I was panting like a dog. The pepper plantation was quite unexpected - I thought it was gonna be a commercialised tourist attraction but it turned out to be a family-run mini plantation, which was even better in my opinion. I saw how pepper was grown and put out in the sun, and bought a bag of it from the nice khmer 'auntie' who spoke no english but was very friendly. Kampot is famous for its pepper so I had to get some.

After the day trip I visited a traditional music and dance school which teaches disabled/orphaned children traditional musical instruments and dance. For dinner I chilled at a small cafe along the river, admiring the sunset while savouring my delicious grilled eggplant and goat cheese baguette (2 of my fav foods!).

Kampot is worth a visit if you're sick of crowds, honking motorists and white people. Plus you get plenty of nice scenery of mountain ranges and rivers too!

The field trip that wasn’t

shix — Tue, 28 Oct 2008 22:25:00 GMT

26/10 Sun - Today was supposed to be Field Trip day to Ream National Park for the CCPP kids. Ream National Park is 18km east of S’ville and one of the attractions here. It consists of mainly lowland forests, swamps and habitats for several endangered species. Supposed to be, but didn’t quite happen, due to a series of unfortunate events.

First, 57 kids, 2 staff and 5 volunteers had to squeeze into the back of a small truck, which was all wet and muddy from the rain and there was hardly any standing space even for just the children. It was almost a ride headed for disaster – imagine bumping up and down at the back of the truck, standing in the rain, for an hour. So we called for reinforcements – 2 tuk tuks, and got a few of the kids in there, and since the rain had stopped and the kids seemed to enjoy being in there altogether, we decided to let it be and the rest of us got into the tuk tuks with the pots of food. Then, midway, it started pouring again and it began to get really cold for the kids so we stopped and squeezed in more of them into the tuk tuks. When we got to Ream, the staff decided to make a u-turn back to seek shelter at one of the beach shacks. There was no shelter in the park, the rain was just too heavy and everyone was drenched; it seemed pointless to go. At the beach shack we fed the children lunch, and basically just waited out the rain, while the kids played in the sea. But the rain didn’t stop even after a few hours and we decided to head back. We put as many kids as possible (20 of the youngest and weakest ones) in the 2 tuk tuks, and the older kids and all the volunteers got up the truck. The kids donned the raincoats and the volunteers just made do with what we already had on us (i.e. soaked t-shirts) as there weren’t enough raincoats. There was still hardly enough space in the truck and it was still all muddy.

But here was where it started to become fun. The ride back was like a rollercoaster ride. Bumpy roads notwithstanding, the truck driver swerved and jammed on his brakes like there was no tomorrow, causing everyone behind to sway and cling onto our dear lives. Some of the kids were standing the whole way and every time the truck swerved it seemed like a domino effect was about to take place. I couldn’t kneel for an hour on the rickety truck so I just sat down…in the mud. Along the way we all laughed at the ridiculousness of it all. When we arrived and I got up, all the kids had such a laugh making fun of my muddy bum while I chased them around threatening to pass it on to them.

And even though we didn’t really make it to the National park, the day couldn’t be more unforgettable.

Sihanoukville

shix — Thu, 23 Oct 2008 21:12:00 GMT

I’ve been here for almost 3 weeks and it’s easy to see why so many foreigners have decided to extend their stays or just stay put for good.

A lil’ background info: Sihanoukville, situated on the South Coast of Cambodia, was relatively undeveloped under the French rule (hence no French colonial architecture) and became a port city only in the 1950s. I shall save you the historical details but just know that the last battle of the Vietnam War took place here (it’s quite close to the Vietnam border) and not Vietnam when Khmer Rouge forces seized an American container ship. Off the mainland, there’re also several islands (some quite untouched) which are quite popular with tourists.

Present day S’ville has become a beach town popular with backpackers and well-to-do Cambodians. In the past 20 days I’ve been here, I’ve noticed that this place seems to have been infiltrated by so many barangs (khmer for foreigner) the ratio of barangs to locals seems to be 50-50. Most establishments are even owned by barangs. Currently S’ville is dotted with guesthouses, beach bungalows, internet cafes, beach bars, international restaurants, a 5-star hotel and a few more are being built. Which to me is a sad thing as everything here is catered towards the tourist and this place could lose its charm real soon. S’ville would no doubt be a very different place in a few years. It might turn into a 2^nd Pattaya for all we know; a Caucasian guy having a local working girl as arm accessory is a common sight here. Also, good news for people looking for “special herbs” - this place is almost weed heaven; it’s easy to get your hands on a joint or get a “special” pizza. I’ve seen establishments openly writing “marijuana” on their signs.

But those things aside, the pace here is superbly relaxing. If you wanna get a tan while sipping a cocktail on one of the several beaches, you can take your pick from the countless beach bars lined along them. Downtown is where you can find the main wet market, supermarkets and banks. If you’re a sleaze bag or just purely wanna stay on the hill, Victory hill is the answer.

I’m in a superb location as it’s quite quiet overlooking an undeveloped patch of land but it’s 200m away from the Serendipity beach, which is the most popular (hence overcrowded) beach, and it’s also close enough to many good restaurants/pubs. What’s interesting is the road leading to the beach (and where CCPP is located on) is probably the only rocky unpaved road tourists will trudge on here in S’ville.

Random bits

shix — Tue, 21 Oct 2008 22:37:00 GMT

of info on what I’ve been up to. Other than volunteering, I’ve been honing my skills on becoming a slob. Yup there’s absolutely nothing much to do in my free time other than tan on a beach, chill at a bar, have my daily servings of bread and cheese (too sinful! why did I have to live next to a bakery with fantastic fresh bread?) or take an afternoon nap when the kids tire me out (those who know me know I NEVER take afternoon naps). The only physical activity I’m engaged in is when I’m with the kids, which is exhausting mind you. You need lotsa energy to keep up with them.

So as an antidote to the growing slob in me, I’ve managed to find work at the restaurant-cum-bar located right next to the painting centre. For a few nights a week and 4 hours each time, I sit at the bar, make cocktails (or rather, learn how to make them), take food orders, serve customers and make small talk. It’s low season and the place is quite quiet at night so there’s not much to do, but hey, at least I’m finding something to do at night. I don’t get paid but I get dinner (they’ve fantastic food!) and drinks on work days, which is great as I get to save money and learn how to make cocktails – a very useful life skill J.

2 weeks more to go before I head home and I’m not looking forward to it…

Great Leap Forward

shix — Tue, 21 Oct 2008 22:27:00 GMT

for CCPP the past few days. A batch of about 30 kids have been sent to the local junior school. This is a BIG deal for the kids – it presents them a chance of a lifetime to receive an education and hopefully escape the poverty cycle.

Most of the CCPP kids, some reaching the age of 14, have NEVER been to school in their lives. Local state schools are not expensive but many families in S’ville live on a subsistence level. Some of the children have lost one or both parents, are abused or neglected by them and almost all live in extreme poverty without electricity, clean water and food. If you were here and could see for yourself how these children survive by selling bracelets and fruits or picking cans, you would understand the urgent need to provide them with a safe and supportive environment. What CCPP is trying to do is to work with this group of children and provide them with the means to make some basic income through the sale of their paintings as well as free medical care, lunch and education. Instead of peddling on the beach, they can develop their imagination through painting and simply be kids, through games and interaction. Through donations and help of volunteers, CCPP has been fortunate enough to acquire school uniforms, bags and stationery for this bunch of kids and send them to school.

I was very lucky to witness all this. Last Friday was a big day for the kids and the staff as for the first time the children tried on their uniforms and were each given a (second-hand) school bag and brand new stationery. I was helping the children change into their uniforms and the look on their faces was just… priceless. Sheer joy and excitement written on these young faces, and you can tell how they’ve been waiting for this day for a long long time. I couldn’t understand what they were saying in Khmer but just looking at them beaming I could feel their appreciation and elation. I’ve only been here for 2 weeks but having daily interactions with them and knowing about their backgrounds from the staff, I actually felt teary-eyed watching them in their crisp white and blue uniforms waiting to take their group photo.

Monday was the 1^st day of school for the CCPP kids and they all gathered before 7am at the centre dressed in their school gear. Having caught less than 4 hours of sleep, I had to get out of bed; I didn’t wanna miss the chance to send them to school. The entire bunch managed to squeeze into 2 tuk tuks and off they went to school. There they were then divided into 2 groups and joined in 2 of the Grade 1 classes. There was none of that silly nonsense back home where Primary 1 kids cry and refuse to enter the classrooms. These kids couldn’t wait! It was such a sight seeing them seated at their desks, eagerly taking out their exercise books and wasting no time in filling those pages.

They’ve come such a long way and it’s been such an achievement for CCPP to put these children in school. Now we just hope that they carry on with it and work really hard. It is a small step but a great leap forward towards a better future for them.

The trappings of one's mind

shix — Mon, 20 Oct 2008 21:25:00 GMT

Can be a frightening thing. I’m referring to one’s socio-economic and cultural background. Warning: reflective post ahead.

In the past 2 weeks I’ve been here, I’ve met and spoken to several foreigners who have made S’ville their (temporary) home. Temporary because although they’ve been here for months or even years, they never know if (some do in fact know) they will move to another country when the time comes. That’s the thing - they are their own persons, and they have the freedom to follow their heart and listen to what it’s telling them, be it volunteer in India for 3 months or live in a strange new place for a year. That is true freedom – a social, cultural and financial freedom to do what we want in life.

Most of these people gave up well-paying jobs and cushy lifestyles in their developed countries to come live in S’ville. A few came to volunteer, others to set up an NGO or business, and most to just live and then find a job to get by (as a diving instructor or waitress, anything). To them, enough was enough and life is more than just making money and climbing the corporate ladder. Life could be so much simpler if we all just took a step back and just…realize that we don’t have to be confined to and defined by what we were brought up to believe in. Yes, the fact is that not all of us have the financial freedom or the guts to leave our all-so-familiar lives behind us. I know I still have the trappings of my own mind that is stopping me from staying on for a longer period of time so that I could do something substantial for the project and the kids. There is really no immediate urgency for me to go home and look for a job, especially not in this shit economic times, but yet I have to return to “reality” – go home to my family and find a (well-paying) job. This “reality” is in itself so painfully ironic; it is the reality I grew up with, the one I’ve grown accustomed to. I know that there’s so much more to life than that job or that relationship or that piece of accessory or clothing, but somehow I’m still unable to break free from it all.

I guess at least now I’m fortunate to be able to see where I stand today, and hope that one day I can forsake it all and have the guts to just follow what my heart tells me to - only then am I truly free from the trappings of my own mind.

Bamboo Island

shix — Thu, 16 Oct 2008 17:15:00 GMT

As the centre is closed on Mondays, fellow volunteer Megan and I decided to take a day trip to one of the nearby islands – Bamboo Island. This crescent-shaped island is an hour’s boat trip away from Sihanoukville, and boy was it a world of difference from Serendipity beach!

At Serendipity beach you get no peace at all. Besides having to jostle for a space on the overcrowded beach, you have to bear with the loud music coming from the various beach bars and the many hawkers and beach children peddling bracelets, food/drinks or offering massage services. It is not a pretty sight to see so many beach children trying to eke a living from peddling and picking up soft drink cans – you know they should be in school but most of them cannot afford it.

Bamboo Island urned out to be the total opposite. There’re only 2 restaurants and a few bungalows on either side of the island. There was hardly anyone on the beach (the whole afternoon we were there we probably shared the entire stretch of beach with 6 other sunbathers!) and absolutely no hawkers and beach children. We had all the peace we had set out to find in this day trip – away from all the crowds noise and crazy kids from the centre… Toes sunken into the warm fine sand, sun shining down on my back, hotel costes playing in my ears and book in hand…aaahhhh pure tranquility, pure relaxation.

Gallery: Sihanoukville

shix — Thu, 16 Oct 2008 17:10:00 GMT

when i said

shix — Thu, 9 Oct 2008 17:43:00 GMT

this was gonna be a physical challenge a month ago, it was some fantastic foresight or what!

Firstly, my immune system gave way and I fell ill, first time ever overseas! It started with a tummy ache and evolved into a fever. Don’t ask me what I had. I’ve no idea. My guess is mild food poisoning? Or according to a seasoned volunteer here, I probably caught some virus from one of the kids here. They’re so used to dirt and dust they’ve got super resilient bodies, not like our supposedly “healthy” ones which are so susceptible to viral attacks and infections unknown in our “sterile” environments. I was told that everyone here, all staff and volunteers, get sick from time to time, so I guess I just had my turn earlier than expected. So anyway I recovered after 2 days and I was again ready to deal with these kids, which pose an even larger physical challenge.

Being kids, they’re always jumping onto you from behind (piggyback ride!) or sitting on your shoulders or hugging you from all directions possible. I swear I’ll develop some huge muscles by the end of the month. They are full of energy and never seem to tire at all! Besides painting and lunch when they’re actually seated down, they spend all other times running around, playing ball, chasing one another or even fighting. Yeah they fight all right, sometimes several times a day. The staff and volunteers have to step in to stop them from punching each other. It’s largely because of the tough environment they’re used to growing up in as beach children, so it’s quite common around here. But it’s usually petty fights and they get over it quickly. Although my duties here are far from being labour-intensive, it’s playing and looking after the kids that quickly drains you of your energy. That, and not forgetting the punishing heat as well. But we volunteers work on half-day shifts of 4 hours, 6 days a week, so we’ve free time to do whatever we want off duty. I have to say that I’m still trying to get used to not having much to do (what a contrast to my hectic 10-hr workdays) but so far I’m enjoying my time here.

C.C.P.P

shix — Sun, 5 Oct 2008 18:44:00 GMT

I apologize for my loooong (and backdated) entries. I don’t get WIFI at my accommodation and only am able to update when I get to an internet café or a place with WIFI.

I’m now in Sihanoukville on my 2^nd volunteer stint with C.C.P.P (Cambodian Children's Painting Project). So far it’s been pretty nice. I get a gorgeous sunset everyday by the beach, play with paint and work with kids – what’s not to like?! The centre is just 200m away from the beach, the accommodation is a comfortable basic house above the centre, the staff and fellow volunteers easy going and the children a rowdy but fun-loving bunch. The kids here differ slightly from the ones at FLOW as they’re beach children and are used to a difficult life; some are orphans while others are neglected or abused by their parents. You see a lot of children here selling stuff to tourists on the beach ranging from bracelets to food and collecting drink cans and bottles to help the family. Their background is really much more complicated than we can imagine and it can only be the aim of NGOs like this one to get them off the beach and back to school, and restore their emotional and physical well-being.

With my short time here I can only do that much and hopefully all these little bit contributed by volunteers add up to a substantial amount of good.

Clash of perspectives

shix — Sun, 5 Oct 2008 18:36:00 GMT

At the Okay Guesthouse where I stayed in Phnom Penh, there’s a restaurant on the ground floor and a great place to meet fellow travelers. Just that night Amanda and I were having dinner and Ken from NZ sat down at our table. He’s older than my Dad but we hit it off once the conversation got started. When he found out that I had graduated, worked for a year, quit and came here, he immediately knew what I was up to, or rather, what I was trying to look for. His advice to us both was “Be yourself.” It might sound like a huge cliché but at this juncture of my life, these 2 words couldn’t come at a better time. It’s a time for me to reflect, recharge and gain perspective. He also said that by making the decision to take this trip, I was already on my way and I’d probably be able to “be myself”. Well I hope so. So many of us get lost and if we do find true contentment in our lives, that’s something others can’t take away.

We also got to talking about our respective cultures and societal norms and it was extremely insightful to hear about the different perspectives coming from Amanda and Ken. When it came to the topic of arranged marriages, Amanda said that she would comply even though she did not feel for the guy. What struck me was how this girl, who was so independent and had a gungho attitude about everything (she loves traveling alone, tries all kinda stuff which she’d never seen from roadside stalls and is doing post-grad studies in Spanish literature – how rare is that?), could actually agree to an arranged marriage with a guy she’d never met just because it was her ‘duty’ to be a filial daughter and dutiful wife. To her, marriage is a “job” just like any other job. I’m not judging her and saying that she should/should not comply but what was interesting to me was that to her, societal and familial obligations were more important than her personal ambitions and dreams. I guess that was a reflection of her collectivistic culture. Ken isn’t married and he had an exact opposite view on the matter. I guess for me, it’s a mixture of collectivistic/individualistic cultures because as much as I could understand what Amanda meant about society expecting her to be married and become a mother (eventually), I could not fathom her willingness to comply just like that, like any other “job”. Of course, there isn’t any wrong or right in these decisions – they are a reflection of our backgrounds and they are how we lead our lives.

In those 3 hours I think I gained a fair bit by talking to them both.

Phnom Penh – It was all good until…

shix — Sun, 5 Oct 2008 18:15:00 GMT

Between Siem Reap and Sihanoukville, I had a few days in Phnom Penh where I really got to see the city and walked the streets.

On my 1^st day I got to see the Royal Palace/Silver Pagoda and the National Museum. Nothing spectacular but seeing the many Buddha heads in the national museum did make more sense out of the Angkor temples visit as I tried to mentally picture those heads on those countless headless statues in the temples. Most of these were looted and later recovered. As usual, the Royal palace had a ton of lavish stuff and it’s mind boggling to see all these luxuries not being put to better use for the impoverished people of the kingdom. But sadly that’s quite the norm isn’t it? At the Royal Palace one of the monks (there’re tons everywhere) beckoned me to take a picture of him! Then he asked me to visit his home (twice!), barely a minute after we met. Of course he was joking but my impression of monks has been changed somewhat since my visit to this country. But then again, I probably had an outdated and inaccurate impression of them.

The 2^nd day was a day of doing nothing. I just walked and walked and walked…everywhere. Phnom Penh is really not hard to navigate once you get the hang of it. Once you start ignoring the crazy traffic and just cross the roads, the bikes and cars do give way to you. The streets might seem chaotic but they’re actually laid out in a grid. Parallel streets are even-numbered and the adjacent ones are odd-numbered. They’re all in running order but don’t be surprised if you’re standing on St 19 and the next parallel one is St 31. I’ve yet to (and probably will never) figure that out. My favourite streets have gotta be 240 and 178. On 240 you can find some very nice quiet cafes and local handicraft shops, some run by NGOs. ‘The Shop’ is worth a special mention – it offers tired travelers a quiet and shady garden to rest their feet at its bakery cum café. I indulged in a goat cheese and mushroom quiche and ice coffee. Heaven. Definitely going back there before I return home. St 178 is lined with many local art shops so if you wanna get a painting this is the place. I also visited the ChildSafe information centre to find out more about this organisation’s work in governing and supporting local NGOs in child protection policies. Talking to the representative, Mao, confirmed my suspicions about visiting the orphanage so eagerly suggested by the tuk tuk driver at the Okay Guesthouse. There was a poster of the orphanage in the restaurant and from day 1 this guy had been trying to get me to go. I had a niggling feeling that something was not right and although I can’t know for sure, I suspect it’s one of the orphanages involved in orphanage tourism, a real growing problem in Cambodia where tourists are milked for their compassion and their donations don’t directly benefit the kids. Please think twice before you visit any orphanage in Cambodia, or any country for that matter. If you think about it, a few hours’ visit does not really benefit the kids and although they might gain a meal or some candy, they are also at risk of being abused or exploited if left unsupervised.

Ok so anyway, back to my day in PP, I moved on to Camory, a cookie café opened by some SMU students and Cambodians. It is now run by the locals, giving them employment and training. Then my day had to end on a sour note as I stupidly got conned by an a**hole on my way back to the guesthouse. I was taking a 30 min stroll along Sisowat Quay when I saw this Caucasian male walking hurriedly towards me from afar. He was in his 40s or 50s and seemed lost so I stopped when he asked for help, thinking he needed directions. He ended up telling me some cock and bull story about his bag being ripped apart on his bus journey and all his money was gone (in my defense I’d read about such stuff in guidebooks earlier on). He had gone to the tourist police and the embassy but it was closed blah blah blah. Long story short, he wanted a ‘loan’ of US$5. Of course at that time it didn’t sound like a cock and bull story, so I gave him US$4 after he assured me he would return me the money the next day once he was able to call his family to transfer money over to him. Stupid, I know. As I’m typing this I’m still beating myself up over it for believing this bastard. I mean, this guy even asked for a map and directions on how to get to my guesthouse! Of course 4 bucks isn’t a lot if you look at the big picture but I just hate myself for being stupid. I know he’ll get his retribution but it just sucks being conned. 4 bucks could have paid for a good meal and drink in a restaurant! UGH. But they say, you haven't been to Asia until you've been conned...oh well.

So that was a sucky end to my otherwise very nice time in Phnom Penh. Oh that, and the fact that a rat ran into my room and under my bed. Yep not kidding. But it vanished into thin air and so I just left it as that.

Day 4: A final walkabout in Siem Reap

shix — Sun, 5 Oct 2008 18:06:00 GMT

29 Sep

Woke up when I woke up, had breakfast while watching tiny little frogs jump from one place to another just beneath my table and had all the time in the world to decide what I could do for the rest of the day. Then I packed my bags, checked out of Bou Savy and moved into Popular guesthouse. I’d wanted a cheaper room (US$5) and to be closer to where all the action was since it was my last day in Siem Reap.

By the time I checked into Popular guesthouse it was almost noon so I ventured out into the city, browsed around the Old Market and then went in search of Bloom, a shop started by Singaporean, Diana. I’d come across her blog before I left home. Diana gave up a high-flying career to set up a handmade bag store, employing single impoverished Cambodian mothers. Not only does she give the women the means to earn a living, she also helps the environment! All the raw materials used for the products are made from huge recycled sacks used to contain fish food in Vietnam. So you get these quirky designs of fish and mermaids and Vietnamese words in all sorts of bright colours in all shapes and sizes. They have big and small totes, pouches, accessories holders and clothes made from recycled saris. I bought an accessories holder and some pouches. Check out Bloom at www.bloomcambodia.com From the moment I stepped in she recognized that I was a fellow S’porean and we got to talking. It was really nice hearing the familiar Singlish coming from her while she said she was glad to be using it!

After lunch I’d intended to visit the Miniature replicas of Angkor temples which is further away from the main tourist sights. It’s located in the residential area. It was there that a moto driver came up to me asking if I needed a moto ride. I declined and walked on. He tried telling me that I was going the wrong way but I didn’t believe him at first. You can’t blame me for being skeptical; tourists are being accosted by moto and tuk tuk drivers at every corner so I figured this guy just wanted to earn a quick buck, seeing how close I was to my destination. But he went “really, really!” and I relented and hopped on his moto. True enough the Miniature replicas were only about 100m away on an adjacent street. Too bad it was closed for the P’Chum Ben holiday. I quietly laughed at myself for being so skeptical but hey, when you’re traveling alone, it pays to be cautious. So I told him to head for Angkor Wat instead. Now I’m proud to say that I’ve used all possible affordable means to get to the temples – cycling, tuk tuk and moto! After my virgin moto ride in the countryside, this ride was a breeze - I just enjoyed the wind (and dust) blowing in my hair.

Managed to walk around Angkor Wat for the last time and caught the sunset which was quite pretty, although not as spectacular as the sunrise. After that, I headed back to town for dinner followed by a shoulder and neck massage (my body was protesting after all the temple-visiting). As the masseuse worked her magic on my knots, I thought to myself that there was no better way to end my Siem Reap trip J

Day 3: Other temple ruins

shix — Wed, 1 Oct 2008 21:58:00 GMT

28 Sep

After a night's rest, we got ourselves ready for a 2nd day of temple visiting. Armed with masks and shades (lesson learnt after getting sand in your mouth and dust in our eyes), we set off on a 30min tuk tuk ride to Banteay Srey, a relatively small temple famed for its deep and intricate carvings. The rest of the day was spent visiting Preah Khan, Ta Keo, Ta Prohm and Ta Som. Between each temple we had to travel by tuk tuk and all in all we spent about 6-7 hours walking around the temples.

On the way down those steep steps of Ta Keo, I started imagining how more than one person must have tripped and rolled all the way down like a ragged doll. The temple was almost 8 storeys high! And that thought scared me. I was almost on all fours all the way down.

Ta Prohm was just awe-inspiring and humbling at the same time. Huge tree roots engulfed the temple walls or just sprouted above them, as if reminding mankind that no man-made structure can stand in the way of nature.

By about 3pm, temple fatigue set in. We had visited a total of 13 temple ruins in those 2 days and had to skip one. We couldn't take in anymore of those temples. So we made our way back to shower. Seriously, the heat and humidity was just way too much for us to handle. Amanda and I then parted ways at my guesthouse.

To counter the temple fatigue, I headed back to Pub Street in the evening and just chilled at this nice little cafe, Blue Pumpkin. The plush white lounge sofas were just sooo welcoming and they had free wifi! Too bad I didn't lug my laptop along.