You Hate Us Cuz You Ain't Us

Happiness is Clean Feet

peacepigs — Fri, 9 Jan 2015 22:04:00 GMT

Woke up bright and early for our big trip to Valle del Cocora, Colombia's treasured landscape. In order to get from Salento to the valley (where your long hike begins) you have to jump into one of these Willys Jeeps from WWII. These Jeeps, which comfortably hold about 6 people, will not leave until they have about 12 tourists on board. This means cramming people in as much as possible and having about 3-4 standing on the back bumper. It's part of the experience and quite fun. Footage to come later.

Arriving at the valley, we had no idea what a long day would be ahead of us. We got there around 8.20 (after grabbing a packed lunch from 'Brunch,' this great restaurant run by Jeff from Oregon). We got back to Salento around 8pm. Yes people, that is a 10 hour hike. And boy was it beautiful.

The hike was strenuous, most strenuous hike I've ever done (yes Pad, even steeper than the Batona Trail). To me, it felt like the entire hike was uphill. Our altitude ranged from about 2500-3000 meters, so the air was thin and it was quite difficult to breathe. We took it very slow though, and made out just fine. We visited a Hummingbird sanctuary at about 2800 meters. We climbed up a steep mountainside to El Mirador at about 3000 meters, and we ate out lunch relaxed on the side of the peak of a mountain staring ahead at another mountain. When we thought the journey was over and we just needed to head back to Cocora for our Jeep ride back, it turns out we still had another 6 or so kilometers to hike back (to complete the loop). This is where the real prized sites were. Striking valleys of all depths and shades of green with fast moving, wispy fog creeping through. The mountains that encased the valley were adorned with tall palm trees, in fact the tallest variety of Palm trees in the world. These are Colombia's national tree. We sat for a while and enjoyed the view, which has by far been the most amazing of the whole trip (amongst tons of amazing views) and then continued on back to Cocora to catch our crammed Jeep back to Salento.

In Salento we went in search of a hotel with hot water. Matt and I agreed that after our 10 hour hike, we deserved one (not to mention it gets chilly in Salento at night since it is situated at 2600 m). Btw none of these altitude numbers mean anything to me, but they do to Matt and they will I'm sure to some of you. All I knew was that my shampoo exploded everywhere and I could never really take a deep enough breath. We settled on Tralala, a fancy little hostel but really well-priced. Got my warm shower and cleaned my feet. Don't think I've ever been so elated by clean feet. What a lovely thing.

Salento had its huge annual New Years festival going on while we were there which we got to enjoy. Salento was a quaint little town with colorful shops an street musicians everywhere. Then in the big center square there was the proper party/club scene. Let me tell you, these Colombians know how to party. We just explored, observed, and then went back for a good nights sleep. Exhausting but fantastic day.

Yo soy Iron Man

peacepigs — Thu, 8 Jan 2015 19:59:00 GMT

Alas, the bus ride from Medellin to Armenia (large city closest to Salento, our destination) was much better. First of all, the movie of choice was Iron Man 3, which was entertaining even in badly dubbed Spanish.

The ride wasn't freezing either. It lasted for about 8 hours. We arrived in Armenia and then took yet another bus (this one was local --only about 25 min in length) to Salento. Hostel that we'd hoped to stay in was booked, but the boy at the desk recommended one down the street called Las Palmas which is where we ended up staying. The place smelled like Gremmom's basement, and our room ended up being around the corner from the place, as in the door opened right from the street. The room was hilarious and provided a lovely night's sleep. 3 beds in there, each one with intense comforters detailing nature scenes (i.e. Lions and tigers and bears). Faux majesty, it was perfection.

For dinner we ate at a place called Eliana's which served traditional Colombian cuisine... And Indian curry. Upon paying I had a chat with the owner Jésus about the World Cup and out respective national teams. He is Spanish and hates the Spanish national team. Says they are too political and that's why they suck right now. Anyone who is "in with the right people" as opposed to being a talented footballer, can be on the team. He wished the USA well in Russia 2018, and then we left.

Back in our hostel, it was the first time the whole trip that I slept straight through the night.

The Bus Ride from Actual Hell

peacepigs — Thu, 8 Jan 2015 01:30:00 GMT

Let me tell you about the bus ride from Hell. And this bus ride doesn't even hold a friggin candle (time-wise, anyway) to the one I'll need to take in a few weeks from Guayaquil, Ecuador to Lima, Peru which is for 28 HOURS.

This bus ride is freezing cold, as you can imagine any Hellish bus ride would be. And I don't have a blanket. The bus stops every 2-3 minutes to either avoid potholes, down trees, broken roads, or friggin SPEED BUMPS in the middle of Absolute Nowhere, Colombia. Like who even put these speed bumps on the road in the middle of nowhere??? What purpose do they serve??? It's not like we're in a neighborhood or something. And my stupid seat swings upright from its "reclined position" because it is very broken. So I've given up on trying to actually recline and get some sleep.

The frigging driver does not know how to take an easy stop. He pretty much slams on the brakes every 2 minutes, and that is absolutely not an exaggeration. Pretty sure Matt is even having trouble sleeping through this, and he can sleep through anything. Earlier in this 16-hour bus ride from Santa Marta to Medellin, Matt commented that he was surprised this bus wasn't a double-decker as many of the long-journey buses are around these parts. After a few hours, I realize that this bus isn't a double decker by the grace of God, because this friggin driver takes the curves so sharp and fast that we would have surely tipped by now had this been a double-decker. So, cheers God!

For the second 3-4 hours of this journey, there was a crappy TV which was blinking between a bright blue screen and a fuzzy scrolling picture of the actual film, with all the speakers in the entire bus on FULL BLAST. Like I couldn't even turn my iPod (Mac's iPod--Mac you are a literal life-saver) up high enough to drown out the film's audio. And what was the film you ask? Oh, a rich one indeed called Seal Team Eight or some Bologna that made me want to puke down the front of my shirt. All it was the entire time was women crying and huge explosions and automatic weapons. Like I can't make this up. Oh and the occasional macho Spanish-speaking man who was threatening someone. So that was all pretty cool. Super great film.

And what does a bus ride from Hell smell like the entire time? Why a port-a-pot, of course!!

So feeling pretty pissy right now, also it's 1am and pretty much everyone else on this bus is asleep or pretending to be and I will not sleep this entire night. Good thing some creative energy has hit, otherwise I'd be SOL. Enjoy the ride, folks! Thanks for letting me rant.

White Caps on the Cerulean Sea

peacepigs — Wed, 7 Jan 2015 21:18:00 GMT

For me, the highlight of our trip so far came in a wildly adventurous and fairly dangerous form, as I suppose and high point of a South American Odyssey might occur.

And that highlight was our boat ride from El Cabo (the last location of the hike through Tayrona) back to Taganga where we were staying. The only way back from El Cabo is to either take a boat, or hike the trail all the way back to the start and catch a bus (this would be about a 3-hour hike). You cannot book the boat in advance because the winds are so dangerous on the northern Caribbean coast of Colombia that they decide pretty last-minute whether or not the journey will take place.

I took my Dramamine about 20 minutes before we got on the boat. Post boat ride, on out wet, salty, sandy, crunchy walk back to our bungalow, I remember hearing Matt say "I can't actually believe how dangerous that was. Like I can't believe it was legal. If I'd known it was going to be like that, I wouldn't have done it."

We shared the boat with a ton of tourists. This is because Taganga is quite touristy so only tourists would be taking the boat from El Cabo back to Taganga. Luckily there was a hilarious group of Spanish fratty guys across from us and beside us.

The water is the most amazing blue. It's unlike any I've seen, even in the Caribbean. It's the deepest, brightest cerulean. And we saw a lot of it.

Basically the water was incredibly rough and we were jumping probably 10-14 foot riptides in the middle of Who Even Knows Caribbean Sea. As we started, and they threw everyone's bags in the bow of the ship for "safe-keeping" (everything was soaking wet when we received it back). We would be physically lifted off the seat when we jumped these white waters. I definitely had moments of "shoot...Ma was right. I am actually going to die in Colombia." But for some reason, I couldn't stop laughing. And neither could most people. It's like we were all hopped up on adrenaline and thought "well I guess it's sort of funny how close we are to death right now." The boat ride was incredibly fun and honestly I wouldn't trade it for anything. I got a lot of good footage on the gopro (which was strapped around my wrist in the waterproof case). I haven't had a chance to review it all yet to see if it's done the journey justice.

I think had we capsized, we would have been saved in not too long because we pretty much ride the coast about 2 miles or so out the whole way back. So the next boat going by would have seen us. We were all wearing life jackets. Matt is pretty sure we would have died though haha :) no radios on board.

Our captain was this skinny, muscular, weathered older man who was quite small but resolute. He stood at the front of the boat the entire time, leaning slightly back whilst holding some rope for balance (this made the rope taut). What a guy. I'd like to buy him an Aguila. The engine our boat used was HUGE as you can imagine. Two Colombian boys manned the engine in the back.

Good grief what a ride. It should have been one of those "kiss the earth" moments upon our return, but I think we were all too stunned and still pretty loopy from the adrenaline to react in that way.

Woohoo life!!!!!

The Termite Volcano is not full of Termites

peacepigs — Mon, 5 Jan 2015 15:47:00 GMT

So as it turns out, I never had the stomach bug. BOOM. I muscled through.

Two days ago we woke up in Cartagena, checked out of our hostel, and headed for Volcan de Lodo El Totumo. It was this wild and crazy volcano which instead of erupting lava, erupts mud. Local legend has it that it used to be a real volcano until a Priest banished the devil from it. Now it is where the devil resides. Bathing in the volcanic mud was the most amazing sensation -- it is super buoyant so you just float on the surface. Your whole entire body is covered in mud to the point where you can't see any skin. Felt like an Orc being born of Mordor. But better.

After 40 minutes in the mud volcano, which is supposed to be good for the skin, you go wash up in a lake just down a short dirt road. It was a really cool experience.

We had worked out with the bus driver to drop us off near the volcano on the way back so we could catch a bus to a taxi to another bus to Santa Marta. Seriously it's amazing and hilarious traveling around here. We got dropped off at some remote gas station and didn't even wait 3 minutes before our bus showed up. That bus driver counted his money for the first 10 minutes of our journey, and about an hour later, he sort of slowed down on the edge of the highway and let some people off and flagged down a taxi driver for matt and I. Before we knew what was happening, we were in a taxi to Baranquilla (city where Shakira was born) and then that taxi driver, before arriving at our destination, flagged down a bus to get us to Santa Marta. It's funny how all the drivers around here just try to get you where you're going even if it's not what you'd originally planned. They know better than us, and they've all been on our side. It's pretty awesome.

Taxi to Taganga, the tourist destination of northern Colombia. It has been poppin'. Yesterday we did our obligatory journey into Tayrona National Park which was pretty awesome, but in my opinion too crowded, which detracted from the "natural" aspect of the Park.

Plenty more to say but must go now! Catching a 15 hour bus ride to Medellin. Chat soon xoxoox

Gastroenteritis in Getsemaní

peacepigs — Sun, 4 Jan 2015 16:35:00 GMT

Greetings folks! Great news: Matt and I have both gotten gastroenteritis, aka what us Americans call "the stomach bug." Thus, we have stayed in Cartagena a few days longer than initially planned. Suffice to say, there are plenty of exciting things to do here (for whichever of us is not sick at that given moment). Last night we explored the walled inner city of Cartagena called "old city." It is beautiful with dazzling balconies and narrow streets with vendors everywhere selling handcrafted emerald jewelry, Botero "fat Mona Lisa" paintings, and woven handbags. Even came across a guy making leather sandals by hand (gorgeous)!

Things are a bit expensive here, everything is maybe 50% of the equivalent in America. As we travel further south, things will become significantly cheaper.

i finally have some photos to show you because I took them with my iphone. The real gems are on my GoPro but y'all will have to wait til I return to see those.

Our hostel is pretty cool (figuratively not literally). The corridor is open to the sky and there is a rickety but charming kitchen upstairs which is open as well. Matt and I share a little room with a door and shutters for a window. All rooms have these massively strong fans in them. Cats sit outside and purr from time to time.

Pretty sure I'm coming down with the flu now, which is why I am blogging. Maybe not though -- and either way it's going to be wildly difficult for the flu to take me down. I AM RESILIENT.

Today we went to the gold museum in old city. Was nice because it was air conditioned and free. We then took a taxi to Castillo San Felipe de Barajas which had the most amazing view over the city. Pictures to follow. In other news I am about to enjoy my first empanada (chicken, of course).

IMPORTANT NOTE before I go: Colombians smell amazing. Everyone that passes me by smells fresh and with a hint of some light, floral, and clean cologne. Thank you God, for making all Colombians smell so lovely.

We're baaaaaaack.....

peacepigs — Fri, 2 Jan 2015 18:30:00 GMT

It was an early wake up. One of those where your stomach hurts all morning and it has kind of continual rocky turning. Everything went smoothly getting to the airport. 10 minutes from boarding, Matt went to find a notebook. He came back with no notebook, but instead a vacuum-sealed block of Colby jack cheese. My Frenchman :D

Did some last minute (and I guess also 'first minute') studying of common Spanish phrases aboard the plane to Cartagena. If an aggressive vendor tries to sell you women or cocaine, simply say 'No quiero nada.' Thanks, Lonely Planet!!!

Rough trip to the ATM when we landed in Cartagena. Card wouldn't withdrawal money. Matt was able to spot me.

On bus to "centro" (same as they call city center in Brasil!), this guy came on shouting "OWA! OWA OWA!" Got a little nervous at first because he was drawing attention to himself in an otherwise calm public space. Turns out he was selling these little sleeves of cold water pouches for about 10 cents each (translated in American dollars). OWA=AGUA. Way cool. A bunch of people got them, and then he exited the bus before it started moving to the next stop.

We got off in centro and it was wild and awesome. There was a boy sitting at a kiosk with some old flip phones tied up to the little cart (like they do with pens at the bank), and he was selling calls for CP$200 (about 20 cents).

We did a bit walking around and the city is really beautiful. There is "graffiti" everywhere which is sort of comparable to the murals around Philly but has a more organic feel. It's actually totally different. The artwork is truly beautiful. I wish I could show pictures but they're all on the gopro. I'll need to take some with my phone to give you all a taste of this Colombian paradise.

Hitting the hay early tonight. Matt isn't feeling too swell, but we think it's just due to exhaustion. A cold shower and a good night's sleep should help. PS we'really staying in a hostel called Hostel Viena in Getsemaní.

Big things planned tomorrow :) will update when I can.

To blog or not to blog, that is the question

peacepigs — Thu, 1 Jan 2015 18:00:00 GMT

So as I lay here in NYC, awaiting the arrival of Matt and anticipating the start of our exciting journey tomorrow, I continue to question my dedication to blog-keeping over the next six weeks. Will I do it? Can I be bothered? Will I waste precious time in doing so, or worse: will I regret not having written documentation of my once-in-a-lifetime mock-Euro-student-'gap-year' adventure??? I think the potential agony of regret in the latter option is what drove me to start this. Well, also because I just signed up for travelers insurance (last-minute, I know), and there was an option to start a blog. Secret about Emily: she needs to be spoonfed anything to find motivation. Smh.

I feel excited right now :) I have been having these flashes and visions in my head of all the sites I'll see, from tropical paradises to expansive salt flats. I sort of feel actual bliss in these moments. I get excited about the footage I'll capture and about the fact that I can use that footage as an outlet for what I shall humbly call my slowly dying creative self. This pent-up beast of artistic expression which I thought just might have wilted away to nothing shall be released!

Tomorrow morning, we land in Cartagena, Colombia around 1.30pm. I should go book a hostel now.

Stay tuned for the journey, folks.