You might call it different.

Photos: A temporary home

eliserininger — Sun, 15 Jun 2014 00:52:00 GMT

Old doesn't mean you throw it out

eliserininger — Sat, 14 Jun 2014 23:58:00 GMT

As I mentioned in the post about my cooking class, Thai people use every last part of the things they have. They somehow made congealed chicken blood into a delicacy just to avoid any sort of waste. They appreciate the things they have and show total gratitude for it. Things are quite different, however, across the pond. Within my peer group of American university students, there are plenty of people that have stood hours in line to get the newest iPhone, even though theirs is only two months old. I've never thought this was the right way to live, always striving to obtain the very best, so I really do appreciate the mentality that "old" doesn't mean you throw it out.

At some of the schools I've taught at, resources are so very limited. There's one childcare center where all of the children wear donated soccer uniforms. Some of the primary schools can't even provide each child with a chair, let alone a desk to write on. The one primary school that sticks out in my mind was a classroom of about 25 with three desks to share between the children. Pencils were more of stubs, and the chalkboard had some rough spots. Maybe they would go out and buy brand new things the instant they wanted it, if they could, but the resources just are not there. So instead of complaining, they use what still works and fix what doesn't. Because people here are forced to use things until they simply cannot, they tend to value their belongings more. I cracked my iPhone while I was here, and all of the teachers on homestay were so interested in how I did that and how much it would cost me to get it fixed. When people here can afford something nice, they take care of it. The Thai people I've met are anything but careless, and I was embarrassed to have been so reckless with my own things.

There are so many things, aside from the schools, that are overdue for an update. Even our volunteer accommodations were a little dodgy. The sinks had chunks missing from them, and the tile floors were crumbling. Cobb webs were everywhere, and bugs died by the hundreds in our dormitories this past week. But things don't need to be perfect, they just need to work. Everything here has at least one hole in it, from the motorcycle seats to the sidewalks to the public restrooms. Yes. One public restroom my friend used had a hole in the wall big enough for a woman to casually stare at him. It would be amazing if these things could all be fixed, but most can't. Life doesn't stop, and people don't worry about them. I'm sure they'd all love to have shiny new motorcycles and a squat toilet fit for the King. My point is not to say that Thai people have it rough and simply deal with it. They are collectively the happiest group of people I've come across (granted I haven't been too many places).

My point is this: people here are grateful. They have things that work, and that is enough. Their motorcycles are old as hell, but at least they have a motorcycle to get them from point A to point B. There are so many people with such a limited perspective back home. Spending a month under a leaky roof kind of fixed that for me.

Photos: Cooking in Thailand

eliserininger — Sat, 14 Jun 2014 22:36:00 GMT

The Nicest People on Earth

eliserininger — Fri, 13 Jun 2014 17:03:00 GMT

I knew that Thailand was "the land of the smiles," but it really hits you when you finally meet that person that never stops smiling. I took a cooking class with some friends last weekend, and our instructor was just an exquisite individual. She had us laughing from the moment we arrived until the moment we hugged her goodbye. I think she told us she was in her sixties, but her energy level was so much higher than mine. Her name was Tik.

Tik is such a little chatterbox, with nearly perfect English and an incredibly fascinating life. She's lived in Thailand all her life and worked a variety of jobs in Bangkok ranging from the government work to administrative work in an English charter school. She ran that business herself, determined to learn English. She studied English for ten years and offered to donate all of her resources to the Mirror Foundation, for which I've been working. She is an incredibly generous, kind-hearted woman who never skips a beat. Tik moved to Chiang Rai to follow love. She lives with her boyfriend, Martin, an English teacher from the UK. We never met Martin, but they must be such a cute couple. She refers to him as "Mr. Martin," and they combined their names on the mailbox so that it reads "Martik." They've been together for four years, so we asked her why they weren't married. Marriage is so traditional, and Thai people are traditional, so it seemed like a valid question to ask. I'm pretty sure Tik is a feminist. She talked about how she never felt as if she needed a marriage certificate to validate her feelings or actions. Then she talked to us about how little the majority of Thai men appreciated their wives and how she had always been determined to avoid that fate. I don't think I've ever gotten to know someone so quickly as I got to know Tik.

The thing that I loved the most about her was the honesty in her reactions and responses to the things we said. The moment she learned I was a vegetarian, she screamed a little bit in disappointment. She was such an eccentric woman, always screaming when she was either really happy/satisfied or really shocked. After she got over her initial disappointment in my dietary choices, she took us to this huge food market in Chiang Rai to buy the cooking supplies we'd need. She made sure to buy tofu for me, but that wasn't until after walking us through the meat section of the market. It's commendable that Thai people use every part of the animal, but I really wasn't up for seeing the congealed chicken blood after a night out drinking. If Tik thought that would change my mind about being a vegetarian, then she didn't think that one through. The market was incredibly diverse though. There were fruits on one end, rice at another, meat in the center, clothes over here and vegetables right next to them. Anything that we hadn't tried, Tik bought for us. She wanted to show us the best possible perspective of Thailand. And we got it.

It was quite a long drive from the market to her house, but there were so many beautiful sights along the way. I don't think I'll ever tire of seeing the mountains in Northern Thailand. Her house was beautiful, built just for her and Martin. We prepared butter-sauteed mushrooms, fried cashew chicken, massaman curry, and of course pad Thai. We hadn't eaten more than toast that morning, so once we were finished we ate nearly everything. After eating, Tik insisted that we shower. That was probably the strangest request of the day. We all politely declined, but she kept insisting!!! It was really very funny. She wanted us to shower and use her cooling powder. I'd never heard of cooling powder before this trip, but it has definitely become my best friend over the past 3 weeks. There's no better feeling than staying cold after an ice cold shower in Thailand. So the point is, we used some of that, then she had a whole other list of things for us to do in the afternoon. I hadn't realized we were getting a mini tour when we'd signed up for a cooking class.

The next thing on Tik's list was for us to send off a Chinese lantern, in the daytime, for good luck. The thing about Chinese lanterns is that you have to do it without any wind. So we tried to find a wind-less spot, but the lantern caught on fire and disintegrated to the ground as the 5 of us were screaming, thinking that we'd begun burning her house down. We had to get the hose out to stop it! I kind of felt that this wasn't the best omen... so I changed my wish the second time around. Even the second lantern didn't fly straight though; one of my friends dropped the lighter right through the rice paper. We still sent off our wishes just the same. Maybe these will come true, but just to solidify our good luck, Tik insisted we go to the river to feed thousands of fish, for good karma. So much of what I've done in Thailand has been centered around good karma, good luck, and long life. If I wasn't destined for all of that before coming here, I sure as hell am now. Feeding the fish was, yet again, quite a unique experience. Tik insisted we put our feet in the river and then throw the food in. They went wild when we tossed the food in though! There were fish jumping all over my feet, splashing water everywhere! It was still such a crazy experience. It's also really scary just taking that leap of faith that the fish won't try biting you!

After feeding the fish, Tik took us to the Singha tea plantation. It was so massive, and the smell was incredible, just like the tea plantation I'd visited last week. We took so many beautiful pictures and got to taste the oolong tea. It was all so delicious. By the time Tik dropped us back off at the hotel, we had been with her for over seven hours. I'm not sure if it was her genuine hospitality or her desire for companionship that kept us with her so long, but I know she'll be one of the pieces of Thailand I keep with me. This trip has made me realize that I'm entirely too serious about the silliest of things. When our lantern of wishes burned down, we turned around and got a new one. Even that one wasn't perfect, but it soared away. This is what I'll take away from my short-lived time with Tik: you can always try again.

Photos: Homestay teaching novice monks

eliserininger — Tue, 10 Jun 2014 19:24:00 GMT

Families

eliserininger — Tue, 10 Jun 2014 13:20:00 GMT

I don't know about your family, but I've always considered mine to be pretty close-knit. There's not too many childhood memories I have that don't involve my parents or brothers. The other family members, however, are a different story. My parents chose to bring us up close to our extended family, so I'd often see them on the weekends and holidays, of course, but I have never lived with grandparents, aunts, uncles or cousins. And, for most Americans, this is normal. Some would even venture to say that I see my extended family more often than the norm. So if this is what I considered "close-knit" before coming to Thailand, then I must have had no idea what the term meant. Families in the hill tribes here live much more closely with their families than I'd ever experienced. In my Spanish and culture classes, I'd learned the stock facts of how collectivist cultures live, but seeing it still catches you off guard, even if you may know what to expect. In Aja, the Ahka tribe village we visited last week, there were four generations living under one roof. On top of that, they opened their home to seven of us, just so that we could experience how they lived their daily lives. I would guess that close to 20 people stayed under one roof that night.

The funny thing about our homestay, though, was that I couldn't tell who was who in the family. The children ran from one adult to the next, seeming equally bonded with each. Adults took turns holding the infant and swinging him in his crib. Children excitedly showed each adult their latest handicraft. Everyone helped in preparing the meals. The family life in the hill tribes is entirely communal. Each family member unquestioningly trusts the others to look after their children as if they were sharing the parenting responsibilities equally. This family was entirely different from my own or anything I have ever observed. It wasn’t only their family structure but also the dynamic. It may just have been because we were guests in their house, but I didn’t seem to notice very much open affection between family members. My brothers and I are always horsing around, and my family is always dancing around in the kitchen having a good time. It may be because the hill tribe culture is so rich with the ideals of respect that there is a line drawn between the kinds of relationships you have with your friends versus that you have with your family. Don’t get me wrong, my parents have always reiterated that they are NOT my friends, but the older I get, the more that we seem to get along and relate as friends. I still see my parents as authority figures but respect for my elders may not be viewed as staunchly as it is in the hill tribe cultures.

At any rate, the families are so different, and I’m sure that parents raise their children quite differently from the way that I was raised. I’ve heard that Thai parents don’t punish their children nearly as much. This could be a parenting preference, or possibly the children just don’t need the kind of punishments I did growing up. I think I may have been too much of a little spitfire. I remember being put in the corner for fighting with my brother. I remember getting hot sauce dripped on my tongue a couple of times for talking back. My mom tried the soap technique once, like the mom in “A Christmas Story.” That was just as awful as one could imagine, so I’m glad that was only tested once. Spankings were regular when warranted; I talked a lot in church. Maybe I was a little too rambunctious as a child, but my parents’ method of keeping me in line was normal in American society, I believe. There are always debates about spanking your child; mine did it, but it was never excessive or overly used, and it worked. At a certain point, I learned to stop fighting my parents, and I became a little less difficult. Who’s to say what perfect parenting is. From what I know and see, there is no perfect parent. People in the states have different methods, just as I’m sure there are different varieties of parenting ideas here in Thailand. From what I can observe, however, the biggest difference would have to be the publicity of the punishment. If parents discipline their children here, I certainly haven’t seen it. Children run through the markets, around my legs and, presumably, away from their parents without a single scolding. That’s not how things would have gone in my house. It may be the respectful, collectivist aspect of Thai culture that can account for this: no one wants the attention to be drawn to them or their family, particularly in a negative light. On the other hand, I’ve seen plenty of parents disciplining their children publicly in the states; people in America don’t seem to care if they get negative attention.

It would really be interesting to interview some of the staff here about their own personal family experiences. Secondhand, I know that one of the staff here, P’Kartoon, grew up in a polygamist household; she has two mothers. One is her biological mother, and the other is her father’s second wife. It is my understanding that she views each as her mother, but there is some distinction between them. She is obviously closer with her biological mother and cares for her when she is sick, but so do her half-siblings. I asked about whether or not polygamy is common in Thailand, and the responses were mixed. It seems that it is accepted differently in the city versus the rural areas. Here in the North, it seems to be more common, especially for the hill tribe people. Again, I knew that this happened around the world, but I’ve never met anyone from one of these families.

It’s really been an eye-opening experience coming here, in every way imaginable.

The Military Coup

eliserininger — Tue, 27 May 2014 23:42:00 GMT

I'd be lying if I said I knew a whole lot about the political conflict in Thailand at the moment. The miliitary coup happened last week, after martial law was declared throughout the country. The military has seized power in order to quell protests from those who support the recently ousted prime minister. I'm over an eight hour bus ride away from Bangkok, so we're not seeing demonstrations of any nature in the North, but there are still tensions, and Thai people are more somber than one would expect. The curfew in place is strict, with no one being allowed out in the streets between 10pm and 5am. Penalties for breaking curfew can be up to two years in prison along with enormous fines. Here at the Mirror Foundation, we have over a dozen staff members native to Thailand. They are not so much worried about the coup as they are saddened by it. The military is serious, and the people are sad. This is not the smiling Thailand that tourists hear about and flock to.

Schools were cancelled throughout Thailand last Friday in response to the coup and general turmoil in the country. Many of us were worried that the schools would remain closed until things settled down, but luckily they opened back up today. The military has also seized control of television stations and news sources. If I thought about it too much, I guess I'd be afraid of all of this. I am in a foreign land, after all. The majority has a vastly different culture, language, and set of norms than myself. If I got into any trouble here, chances are that I wouldn't very well be able to talk my way out of it. But then again, I don't think I'll be getting into any trouble here. The protests are far away and are entirely apart from foreign relations. There are problems here, which won't be solved anytime soon, but they are domestic problems. Thais have so much to sort through with the military coup that tourists are the least of their worries. Nonetheless, I am keeping a copy of my passport on me at all times.

A resolution is not close at hand; the red-shirts, supporting the most recent prime minister, blockade every attempt at a new election while the yellow-shirts refuse to settle for anything less than a newly elected government. The general population here is entirely more passionate about their politics than I've ever seen in the US. Of course, there was the occupy movement a couple of years ago, but that fizzled and faded without any real reform. It's inspiring to see that people care so deeply about the happenings of their government. It almost makes me want to start voting in any upcoming elections. I'll only be here for another three weeks, and the conflict will undoubtedly continue long after I'm gone. The country is still beautiful and the people still incredibly welcoming, but an uprising of this nature is bound to have a lasting impact. I wish I had been able to travel under better circumstances, but hey, how many people can really say that they were in Thailand for the 2014 military coup?

The Primary Schools

eliserininger — Fri, 23 May 2014 11:05:00 GMT

Going to a Thai primary school was such an eye-opening experience. It was nothing at all like my fifth grade classes. In Thailand, Hua Fai primary school is mostly open air; the classroom doors all lead out to a common balcony or plaza, and inside the rooms, the far walls are made entirely of open windows. Much like the environment, the people at Hua Fai were also open and inviting.. When we arrived, we were taken to a room where they offered us coffee and breakfast cookies. The principal, speaking some English, seemed very much excited to have us there to teach hobbies to the fifth grade classes. Primary school children in Thailand act pretty much the same as they do in the States. They're constantly laughing, goofing off, and hiding geckos in their desks.

When I initially started this program, I hadn't realized just how proficient some of the students would be in English at their age. Some of these fifth graders were able to communicate quite well with us, and they all picked up pretty fast on what we had to teach them. When we first arrived, the principal made sure to calm down the kids by making an example of one unruly child. He gave him a quick thwap with a ruler, and that was the end of his misbehaving. The principal was, by no means, overly forceful with the child, but the use of corporal punishment in schools is so beyond the scope of my experience that it took me by surprise at first. But, thinking back on the highly respectful Thai culture, the principal's use of force is probably normal. Children are taught to respect their elders at all times, bowing deeper for elders during the wai and never standing at a higher level. They are to speak quietly in their presence and never interrupt. These are common practices of both respect and good manners in Thailand. Therefore, when a child is not showing respect, they will be made to do so.

This is the only use of force toward children that I've seen in Thailand so far. Although we do not exercise corporal punishment in schools in the States, many parents are known to have spanked their children a time or two, to teach them a lesson about their behavior. Here in Thailand, however, I have yet to see anything like that. Parents here tend to treat their children with great care, as though they were made of glass and capable of being broken. I don't see many parents "rough-housing" with children, they generally have a more formal relationship, probably because of the respect required in a relationship with one's elders. Reading articles on parenting styles here, many tend to agree, saying that Thai parents rarely discipline their children, even when they're running rampant through the markets. Those instances could be examples of neglectful parents, but it seems that this is not the case. This style of parenting seems more cultural. Parents here are more lenient to allow the child to learn the important lessons for themselves, in regards to how to act and what kind of behavior ends unfavorably.

At a Glance

eliserininger — Wed, 21 May 2014 10:54:00 GMT

I've landed myself in a rural village in Thailand, about 20 minutes to the north of Chiang Rai. The culture shock never really sets in at first, at least that's what they say. My parents were wondering if it was a strange experience, being in a place where the majority don't speak my language. To me, it was actually sort of calming, in a strange way. It affords you the solitude of being alone while still remaining a part of society. I've picked up some of the little phrases, so far, like "hello," "goodbye," "thank you," etc. The climate though, will take the most getting used to. There isn't a time of day where we're not sweating. This trip seems to be one huge detox: tons of water, tons of sweating, no alcohol and home-grown food from the local villagers. Western food is going to wreak havoc on my stomach when I get home.

The culture here is so different from the states, as one would imagine. At a glance, it seems so much more respectful. Aside from the children, all Thai people greet each other with the wai, a respectful bow to one another. Everyone smiles all the time, in all circumstances. It makes you feel immediately welcomed. They're also entirely more relaxed here as well. Things that would be so inappropriate in the states is perfectly normal here. I saw a woman on a motorbike yesterday with her infant child swaddled in cloth hanging across her back, casually driving down the bumpy, unpaved road. I think things like that are always going to be illegal in Ohio. Maybe here, they just give more responsibility to their citizens; they don't impose laws and rules that one's common sense and good judgment couldn't account for.

Another interesting sight yesterday was a school "bus." It had to have been loaded with at least 20 small children, crowded in the back of a big white van, albeit none of them wearing seatbelts. There was no one worrying that they would get into an accident without their seatbelts on. No police officer was going to crack down on booster seat regulations. People here are just trusted to do what's right for them, what has worked for them for years, without constantly worrying about the "what if's." I wish my world back home could be completely void of all "what if's." There really is no sense in worrying about what may happen when there's nothing to suggest the likelihood that it will. Life here is slowed-down with less structure, less worries.