Tales from an intrepid viajero in Latin America

The End of Road (4/4) - Top Adventures

amil_patel — Fri, 26 Jun 2009 17:36:00 GMT

Over my trip I`ve had many adventures but there were always some that were going to stand out. Whether it be the people you go with, the danger associated with them or just the raw beauty of the place - some adventures are just better than others. Here`s my top 5 from the last eight months in Colombia and Guatemala.

1. The Crater of Volcan Santiaguito (Guatemala). As soon as I did it I knew I`d probably never see or experience anything quite like it again in my life*. It is the natural world at its most raw and a landscape like no other. Watching the sunrise from the crater of one of the most active volcanos in the world is an incomparable experience - you are standing on the crater of Santiaguito watching steam come out of it, with the intimidating Volcan Santa Maria and a chain of other volcanos behind and looking out onto the Pared of Guatemala and the lunar landscape opposite. And that´s not even the half of it. From the wait for the volcano to erupt to the crazy climb up the cone of the crater in 100km/hr winds there is no adventure quite as extreme. The crater itself has "burnt" its way over a km in the last 90 years or so leaving a lunar landscape and series of complexes behind it. If you want to know what being on the moon is like then you should go there...but be warned, it is probably the hardest 8 hr trek you will do when you come back from the crater. You need to be in top condition to do it - maybe 100 try it every year and only 20 or so get to the crater. I should probably add that all volcanologists, the bomberos and the municipalidad in Xela recommend that you don´t go within 2km of the crater as it is too dangerous. Twenty years ago 4 volcanologists went to the crater and did not return. You go at your own risk. If you survive, it`s one hell of a story and the people of Xela will hold you in awe or just call you crazy - it even got me an interview on the radio...

2. Las Amazonas (Colombia/Brazil) - the three day "survival" traverse through the jungle with return by Kayak is probably the most extreme "survival" I`ve done. Fishing, eating the trunks of some strange trees and drinking the milk from white rubber trees is probably about as basic as living gets. From the cacophony of noise in the jungle through to the alligators and jaguar footprints you can`t find quite so much diversity of flora and fauna anywhere else on the planet. It`s also hard work walking 30km in 2.5 days in the heat of the amazon. The kayak ride back is spectacular and I´ve never been quite so scared as rowing with my hands when the motor of the boat Valera and I were in broke down. Who knows what´s in that water...

3. La Cuidad Perdida (Colombia). I`ve never had quite so much fun on a long hike. The best group of people I´ve done a long hike with - a bizarre mix of Colombians, lawyers and teachers. Six days of pure comedy. Oh, and the Cuidad Perdida and countryside aren`t bad either. The ruins are spectacularly set high up with jungle and waterfalls all around. The days are spent walking and cooling off in the numerous streams and rivers along the way. And then there was the tree jump...10m jump into the river after climbing a tree in the middle of the jungle. Bacano.

4. La Laguna Brava (Guatemala). There is nothing quite like knowing you are a pioneer. When Marvin told Don Eduardo that there`s this place near his home town that is a combination of Lake Atitlan and Semuc Champey but there aren´t any tourists he immediately organised a trip out there to see if it was worth opening up to tourism. So a few weeks later, Don Eduardo, his guides and I went to check it out. And it lived up to expectations. The Laguna Brava is about 2 hrs by car followed by a three hour hike through rolling green hills from a town in the middle of nowhere called Nenton. It is so tranquil and beautiful that it is amazing that there is no tourism there. And it is all the better for it. The waters are of emerald greens, turqoises and different shades of blue surrounded by jungle. You can only navigate your way around the lake on "balsas" (basically tree trunks) as there are no paths yet. If you are in Guatemala and want to go there contact Kaqchiquel tours and Don Eduardo should be able to take you. In a country as well touristed as Guatemala there aren´t really any "best kept secrets" but this is one of the few.

5. El Parque Cocuy (Colombia). This should probably be higher but I got unlucky with the weather and my hiking group. For six days we endured heavy rain, snow, sleet and fog but for the hour a day that it was clear the landscapes were stunning. The laguna de la plaza is incredible as is the Pan de Azucar (5,100m). The general landscapes and bizarre vegetation make Cocuy a potential gem. I`m resolved to going back to see it at its best. You can never predict the weather in the mountains, that`s part of the joy of them.

Honourable mentions to to:

a) Volcan Tajamulco (Gua) - the highest point in central america. Surise with the chain of volcanos opposite, some erupting is incredible

b) Volcan Santa Maria (Gua) - Saniagtuito`s mother and the one that most people climb if they are in decent shape. Great views of Xela, other volcanos and a safe place from which to watch the eruptions of Santiagtuito

c)El desierto Tatacoa (Col) - a bit out of the way but a landscape like no other I´ve seen. It looks a bit like a miniature version of Monument Valley.

d) Nebaj to Todos Santos (Gua) - six days through the Cuchamatanes. Great views beautiful scenery in Guatemala´s most famous mountains.

So that`s it for my blog. I travel tomorrow to Bogota and from there get a plane to Mexico City ready for another flight back home on Monday evening. I hope it has been entertaining and informative and also given some ideas of places to go and things to do in Guatemala and Colombia. Now back to my normal, routine life in England. Why can`t some things just last forever?

* Ok, I actually went there twice. The second time was for my "farewell" from Xela. One Friday I was drinking with Mario to plan my farwell and he suggested that we go to La Muela and do a barbecue up there. La Muela is a little, extinct volcano of about 2,600m. In my slightly drunken stupor I suggested that we go to Santiaguito instead as after Santiaguito there is "no hay nada que ver con La Muela". Mario was so drunk he agreed. So a week later Mario, Juan, Bili and I went there. I was actually pretty worried that Mario and Juan wouldn`t come back - they are in no condition to be doing Santiaguito. I was quite happy when they said they didn`t want to climb the cone as it looked a bit difficult. However, Mario´s face was a treat when we got to the final climb. He wasn´t sure how we were going to get up there as everything looked like it was a climb straight up a cliff. I pointed straight up the cliff and told him, "you remember the bit when I told you that there is a part that if you fall you`re going to die, it´s certain. Well, this is it". We had to wait five minutes for him to finish with expletives.

As it happens, for my last day in Xela Mario, a few others and I were a little bit the worse for wear again and we made a pact with Don Eduardo that the next time I am in Xela (in 2011) we are going to climb the crater by night...there`s stupid and then there`s downright foolish. But as Mario says, "somos borrachos pero hombres de palabra".

The End of the Road (3/4) - Top Cities and Chill Out Spots

amil_patel — Thu, 25 Jun 2009 23:05:00 GMT

Both Colombia and Guatemala have some great cities and tranquil chill out spots. Here`s my top 5...

Cities

1. Xela (Guatemala)- I used to laugh when my Guatemalan friends told me that Xela was ¨la tierra prometida¨. I don´t anymore. For me it really is. Some gringo´s complain that it is becoming like Antigua and that their are too many foreigners there. I prefer to call it cosmopolitan - and let´s face it, if you want to hang out all the time with other gringo´s that what´s you´re going to but if you don´t there´s not better place to learn spanish and get involved in everything that Xela has to offer. It´s a city with a great colonial centre, friendly people, vibrant social life and within half an hour you are out climbing volcanos and relaxing in stunningly located hot springs. If I walk down the main street during the day, the odds are that I´m going to bump into somebody I know. Heck, you can even get a good latte there. If I could choose anywhere in the world to live, it´d be Xela.

2. Mompox (Colombia) - ís a small, wonderfully preserved colonial town that it hard to reach. It takes several buses and changes in the middle of nowhere to get there. There isn´t even much to do there. But it has an atmosphere and authenticity that you can´t find anywhere else. When you are in Mompox you are transported to another era of people sitting outside their houses on rocking chairs, groups of men playing draughts by the river and people eating churrasco in the many plazas. It´s even got the best fruit juices I´ve ever tasted.

3. Bogotá (Colombia) - a captial city on the up. It´s got great museums, a youthful vibe, good cafes and people who speak the best Spanish I´ve ever heard. It can get a little bit cold but then again you can´t expect everything.

4. Manizales (Colombia) - stunning location in a valley surrounded by green hills. The city has a university feel to it and the people are super friendly. There are lots of great day trips from the city, including hikes, fincas and nature sanctuaries.

5. Medellin (Colombia) - they say that "there are no ugly Colombia women, just poor ones". Meaning - there is nothing that plastic surgery cannot enhance or correct. Medellin epitomises this and paisas love to party. Sometimes you´ve just got to join in...

Chill Out Spots

1. Lago de Atitlan (Guatemala) - probably the most beautiful lake in the world. Formed in the inverted cone of a volcano and surrounded by three others and beautiful greenery nowhere I´ve been to comes close to Atitlan in terms of raw overpowering beauty. Don´t go to the hippie hang outs of San Pedro or Panajachel. There are plenty of smaller, more tranquil places where you can swim in the lake and take a walk around it. The walk from San Juan de la Laguna to San Marcos is simply stunning. Ok, Lonely Planet says that it is dangerous, but if I listened to Lonley Planet I´d probably never leave the hostel.

2. Mompox (Colombia)

3. Finca Villa Maria (Colombia) - the odds are that you´ll probably have the finca to yourself if you go there. This working coffee farm is near the city of Pereira in the middle of Colombia´s coffee region. It has a swimming pool, horse riding and walks into the surrounding coffee plantations. It is located at the top of a series of fincas meaning that the views from the Villa Maria are unparelled in the coffee region.

4. Parque Tayrona (Colombia) - picture perfect, sandy beaches with turuqoise/blue sea. Rent a hammock, enjoy some seafood and relax. There´s really nothing else to do.

5. Salento (Colombia) - great place to enjoy some of Colombia´s most beautiful scenery. The was palm trees of the Valle Cocora are one of a number of walks that you can do in this area. The town itself is fairly tranquil and laid back with good trout eating opportunities. But the jewell in the crown is a tour around Don Elias´ finca. He is the Clint Eastwood of coffee farmers.

The End of the Road (2/4) - Things that are overrated...

amil_patel — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 19:38:00 GMT

In no particular order, here are the five things or places that I have found most overrated on my travels.

1. Taganga (colombia). Lonely planet describes it as a "fishermen´s village" and I`ve lost count of the number of backpackers who say they went to Taganga and ended up staying for a month or more because they loved the laid back, authentic feel to the place. It is nothing of the sort. Taganga is a dirty, grimy, ugly beach side "settlement" full of Gringo´s looking to do drugs and the beach is horrible as well. Go to Parque Tayrona, it is much nicer...

2. Cocaine. When your average Colombia thinks of cocaine they think of blood, civil war and a drug that has ruined their country`s reputation abroad. In Guatemala it fuels a gang culture that results in at least 14 murders a day in the capital, leaves narcos in charge of many key institutiosn in the country and results in many ordinary Guatemalans wanting an authoritarian army figures in power to improve security in the country. Needless to say, the people of these countries generally hate what the drugs trade means for their countries. Yet somehow, a surprising number of "travellers" seem to think doing cocaine in these countries is somehow cool and don´t seem to make much effort to hide the fact. Sometimes, I wish people would think a little bit before doing cocaine - the downstream impact of the cocaine trade is truly horrific and destroying many countries. Luckily, Colombia seems to be overcoming some of these problems and I can only see tourism growing here in the coming years.

3. "Chicken buses". Westerners seem to love chicken bus rides in Guatemala and I have to admit it is quite an experience the first few times. However, after five months of squeezing 3 or 4 people on a two person seat, having babies crying or throwing up next to you or watching kids eat their Pollo Campero (Guatemala´s KFC) the novelty soon fades.

4. Colombian rum. Colombians are very proud of their rum. Guatemalan rum is much nicer - a good bottle of Barcelo añejo or Botran beats colombian rum all the time and is cheaper. And then there is Ron Zacapa - the winner of "best rum in the world" four years in a row in the early part of the decade it is as my mate Mario says "the best rum in the world". Colombia does many things very well, but rum isn´t one of them.

5. Doing South America in four months. A lot of people try to do to much of S. America in too little time and end up coming away a little disappointed or complain that they´ve spent the whole time hanging out with other Gringos. I´ve been in Colombia for three months and don`t feel that I´ve missed anything by not trying to go to Peru, Bolivia and Argentina in the time I´ve had. A place like Colombia merits three months and I would have come away disappointed if I´d only been to the big cities and Carribean Coast. Sometimes, travelling less and doing more in one country is better than doing the whistlestop tour of S. America...

The End of the Road (1/4) - Comedy moments on my travels

amil_patel — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 18:41:00 GMT

So, it looks like my 8 month trip is coming to an end as it is my last week in Latin America so over the next few days I will be penning some of the highlights, lowlights and comedy moments from my trip. It has been a truly memorable time - I`ve learnt to speak Spanish very well, been on the radio & tv, survived in the Amazon jungle, been to the crater of one of the most active volcanos in the world, climbed peaks of 5,000m, been to some of the world`s most beautiful colonial cities, discovered some of Guatemala`s best kept secrets (trust me, in a country as well touristed as Guatemala that`s hard)and chilled on some amazing lakes and beaches....oh, and I`ve only actually been to two countries. Sometimes, if you pick your countries well, less is more.

Below are some of the things that have made me laugh over the last 8 months...

Top 5 "Most Amateur Moments"

1. The "What language do they speak in England" question - I was chatting to a woman who sells insurance in Guatemala one day when she asked me "what language do you speak in England?". After checking that I`d heard the question correctly I replied in a very matter of fact way "English". This grand revelation was met with the response, "oh, the same as in America". Obviously, I couldn`t let that go so I told her the story of how English arrived in England and the country got its name."Fijese, about 300 years ago the Americans conquered England. And you know how in Spain, France and Germany the languages are named after the countries. Well, the people of England decided to change the name of the country to better match the language like in all other European countries." She believed me. If you happen to come across a Guatemalan girl who sells insurance telling you the story of how England got its name and English came to be spoken in the country you can thank me. Ok, so it was a bit cruel but sometimes you just can`t resist...

2. The "Oh my god, it`s a lion" moment. This happened in my Cuidad Perdida trekking group although I didn`t actually witness it myself. After a days hiking in the jungle some people were sitting around the table ready for dinner when one of the girls exclaimed, "oh my god, did you see that lion". The person sitting next to her at the table responds with, "I think you`ll find that`s a cow that was walking quickly". Doh.

3. The "why don`t they fit cars with catalytic converters in Guatemala" question. A young couple from the US were lodging with Doña Espe for a couple of weeks while I was there. The girl complained to me and her partner one evening about the pollution from vehicles in Xela. "Why don`t they fit all the motorbikes and cars in Guatemala with catalytic converters? I mean, in Calafornia all our cars have them and the air is so much cleaner. Can you ask the señora for me why they don`t do it". I told her that we shouldn`t really trouble the señora with that question as I could probably answer it. Maybe, just maybe,people in Guatemala have greater priorities than having vehicles fitted with catalytic converts - like spending their money on food, clothes, petrol for their vehicles if they have one and sending their children to school...I think she got the message.

4. The "what river is this?" question. On arriving in Leticia, which is on the border of the Colombian, Brazilian and Peruvian portions of the Amazon I was sharing a group with some Colombian tourists. The father of the group turned around and asked his guide, "what river is this then?". Well, amigo, let me give you a clue - we are in a place called the Amazon and the river we are on is about 3km wide. It might just be the River Amazon. Ok, it is a little bit harsh given the number of rivers running through the Amazon you would have thought he`d have looked at a map before arriving in Leticia.

5. The "can you thin out my eyelashes" order. It may surprise some of you, but I can do amateur things as well from time to time. Learning a new language is fraught with dangers none more so when you`ve reached a stage where you think you`re getting pretty good at it. Needing to get my sideburns thinned out while I was having my haircut I wasn`t sure of the word for sideburns but thought I knew it. I asked the hairdresser to "thin out my pestañas". I initally felt quite proud of myself for knowing such a technical word like "thin out" until I saw the haidresser`s horrified look. Hmmm - maybe I got the wrong word. "Mi amor, you`re asking me to thin out your eyelashes" she says pointing at her eyelashes. Oh, doesn`t your average Colombian male ask the same thing...

Amil de La Amazonas - surviving deep in the Amazon Jungle for three days

amil_patel — Wed, 17 Jun 2009 23:54:00 GMT

The more astute amongst you will have noticed that I am indeed trying to row a motorised boat with a stick. That`s what happens when the motor on the boat you are in breaks down 2km from the nearest "settlement" in the middle of the Amazon. More on that later.

For my last "adventure" on this trip I decided to go to the Amazon to do a three day "travesía" through the jungle. This involves a two and a half day hike deep in the Brazilian Amazon followed by a Kayak ride back to the jungle lodge of Palmarí. While I did all the stuff that I describe below, the real hero of my trip was my guide, Valera, a Peruvian who has lived in the Brazilian Amazon for 30 years. He`s a bit like Bear Grylles except he doesn`t get himself into situations where he needs to eat maggots to survive. The travesía that I did is not something that is commonly done - Valera told me he has only taken 30 or so tourists on it in the three years he has been a guide. Most people just go fishing or do "light" activities in the Palmarí jungle lodge located somewhere in the Brazilian Amazon. In fact, Valera told me only two people in the 200 strong Palmarí community venture that deep into the jungle - it is unforgiving territory.

Valera and I prepare for the trip by making a couple of tough decisions. Our rucksacks our very heavy and it is over 30 centigrade so we decide to jettison some non-essentials. We cut down on the amount of food we will take - why take tinned meat when you can fish for your dinner. Decision number two is a bit tougher - do we take a litre and half of water each for 2.5 days hiking or do we jettison the bottle of rum and take more water? The bottle of rum will enable us to sleep at night while the water will probably help us to survive a bit longer. I tell Valera that I don`t drink that much water while hiking and sitting around a fire, drinking rum and listening to the "caiman" (alligators)is probably as good as it gets during the evenings in the jungle. We jettison the water. I am mildly dissapointed when Valera tells me that my walking boots aren`t appropriate for the trip as we`ve gone through a lot together - only wellington boots will do.

We are dropped off by boat about 20 mins from the jungle lodge. After sinking knee deep into flooded jungle within a minute of disembarking I realise why wellington boots are necessary. The first few minutes are passed wading through "flooded jungle" - this is jungle that is underwater during the rainy season but becomes normal jungle during the dry season. Apparently the water level has gone down at least 4m in the last week. We get to a dry part and out comes the machete. Paths do not exist that deep in the Amazon. This is pure machete territory. Added to this, the jungle has set a plethora of "natural" booby traps such as fallen trees, numerous holes down which animals live, "quebradas" (water crossings") and vines that loop around your feet and trip you up. Despite all this I am definitely enjoying myself - it doesn´t get much better than listening to all the bird and monkey noises while cutting your way through thick jungle. Although I do wish Valera would stop shaking the trees - doesn`t he know that there could be green tree snakes up there?

After a few hours we stop for our first break and I`m not sure I´ve ever sweated so much. Still, best to keep the long sleeves on as I don´t want any mosquito bites. We don`t drink any water at this stage but get the rum mixer out - Brazilian cola. We continue on our way in the unforgiving humid conditions cutting random fruits to quench our thirst. Valera tells me the name of them but I`ve never seen half of them before and have not heard of their names in either Spanish or English.

We finish walking at around 3pm and I ask Valera how he knows where the hell we are and what direction we are walking - he doesn`t have a compass and there aren`t any paths. Thirty years experience in the jungle is the answer I get. Sometimes you´ve just got to trust the guide...We tie our hammocks around some trees and hang the black bin liners over them in case it rains. Time to find some dinner in the quebrada. While we are fishing, Valera informs me that there are caiman (alligators) in the quebrada so we best keep a good watch for them. I divert my full time attention to looking out for the caiman - I`d rather be alive than have nice fish to eat for dinner. We don´t catch anything. Luckily we have brought some tinned sardines with us to cook on the fire. Valera cuts some tree down and splits it in half and he tells me this palomita will make an "excellent" salad along with the onion that we have brought with us. It`s surprsingly tasty - or maybe I`m just very hungry. We sit around the fire and drink the rum and Balera smokes some of his "pure" tabacco. He tells me about the time when he got lost in the jungle for nine days. I start to pray that it doesn`t happen to us. The amount of noise in the jungle in the early evening is quite startling. We retire to the hammocks at 6.30pm.

I hear some very loud noises in the middle of the night and ask Valera if it is the caiman. No, those are toads, he informs me. I`ve never heard toads make so much noise before.

I wake up at around 5.30ish to a cacophany of bird sounds and rays of light parting through the dense jungle. Really a great way to wake up in the morning. One of the things about being deep in the jungle is that even the most basic operations hold a certain degree of fear. Take going to the toilet for example. Once the trousers are down you are prey - the mosquitos just make straight for you and before you know it you have hundreds of bites in slightly unedifying places. The incentive to stay down in such a vulnerable position is minimal as you never know what might decide to attack you.

We start walking at around 7am. About an hour into the days walking Valera points out some footprints to me - "mire, son las huellas de jaguares". Oh great, now I am about to get hunted down by some jaguars. Nothing happens. Further into the days walking I manage to slip up on one of the fallen trees we are traversing and end up on my arse. Valera seems to find this quite amusing. We stop at some tree and Valera tells me that its leaves have "medicinal" properties if you have aches and pains. He informs me that you rub the leaves against where the pain is and it gives you a little fever, you shake a bit and then the pain goes. He lets me know that his arm hurts a bit so he gives me a demonstration. The last thing I need is Valera going down with a fever. He seems to survive ok though.

Eventually we come to a quebrada crossing. Valera hacks down some thin trees with his machete to create a bridge. He tells me in a very matter of fact way that there are caiman in the quebrada so it is probably best not to fall into it. The rest of the days walking is tough but rewarding - Valera points out to me all the things that you can eat in the jungle and all the bird species and animals we come across. We finish walking at 1pm. In fact, we`ve finished the travesía. "Usted camina muy bien. Nunca he terminado esta caminata tan rapido". It appears we have done the travesía in record time, a day ahead of schedule. He tells me I`m a very good walker.

We spend the rest of the day fishing and do manage to catch some dinner this time although I`m spending most of my time looking out for caiman. We eat well and drink the rest of the rum. It is just as well as there is a lot of noise in the jungle that evening. This time we do hear the caiman and I spend most of the night hoping they don`t come near our camp - we are about 6m from the quebrada edge. Valera tells me that they never venture out so we are safe enough.

I wake up to find the our rucksacks have been attacked by thousands of spiders and termites. Less than ideal. A good half hour is spent trying to get rid of them. We wait around for a while and a boatman arrives with our kayaks. We have a 3-4 hr kayak ride back to the jungle lodge. It is tough work under the strong sun but is incredibly spectacular. Eagles are in the sky, all kinds are bird species are flying above the river and we even see pink dolphins. This is how life should be. We get back to the Palmarí and everyone seems interested in what we´ve done. It has been an unbelievable adventure.

The next day, Valera and I decide to take the litte motor boat out for a ride along the river. About 2km away from the nearest settlement the motor breaks down and Valera`s best efforts to repair are not enough. I am about ready to accept our fate and wait however long it takes to get rescued. Valera on the other hand has a plan. We are only 50m or so away from flooded jungle. If we can get there we can cut down some branches and use them as oars to get back to safety. Ummm, but Valera how do we get to the flooded jungle? Paddle with our hands of course. So, Valera and I spend the next 20 mins paddling with our hands to get to the flooded jungle. I try to avoid thinking about the possibility of a pirhana attack and finding I no longer have hands. Valera`s machete hacks down a few branches and we spend the next hour and half "rowing" with the branches back to safety. The guy is truly a genius. I`m absolutely exhausted and have to spend the rest of the afternoon recovering in a hammock. We treat ourselves to a few beers of celebration.

The Amazon is an unbelievable adventure if you have enough intrepid spirit to look for the hardest things to do. Valera was an unbelievable character and incredibly resilient - I couldn´t have surived more than a day in the jungle without a guide as good as him. Some people live very simple lives but have a knowledge and feel for the jungle that I can only dream of.

El Parque Cocuy - wind, rain, snow and an hour a day of spectacular views

amil_patel — Wed, 10 Jun 2009 21:51:00 GMT

El Parque Cocuy must rank among one of S. America´s most spectacular yet least visited mountainous areas. It has plenty of intimidating yet scalable 5,000m peaks, incredible lagoons, strange botanical life and rock formations which change colour with the position of the sun. However, there is one thing that you can`t bank on in the mountains - good weather. Things change by the minute - you can have hail one minute and sun the next. I was (un)lucky enough to have an hour of clear weather per day when in the past month or so there has been at least 6. I shouldn`t really complain though as for most of this trip I have been lucky with the weather I have had in the mountains and on treks.

I organised a 5 day trek in Cocuy sometime ago and had been looking forward to it for sometime. Our group consisted of our guide, an eccentric German, his surpringly norma girlfriend and an underprepared Austrian (given what transpired). Anonymity is probably best for this story...

The first days trekking was fairly easy and we had fairly good weather. We got the "milk float" from the village of Cocuy to the start of where our trekking was to begin and had the good fortune to see the "Pan de Azucar", a 5,300m peak, which we were due to climb the next day. It was the only view we got of it for the whole trip. The trekking was fairly easy at 4,000m and we walked through lush mountain valleys and scenery. Although we were deluged with a mid-after shower this was followed by a rainbow that spanned the lower part of the mountain. Early in the evening the rain started and didn´t stop until 7am. Luckily we were already in our tents and weren´t affected by it.

I was really looking forward to Day 2 until I got out of my tent and realised that I was likely to spend the day climbing the Pan de Azucar in pure "cloud forest". In fact, it was far more extreme than I was expecting. It started with rain, turned into snow and gale force winds and ended up with hailstones. Hmmmm. Having acquired the nick-name of "mountain goat" I felt it only fair that I lead the way through the extreme conditions. My gloves were of absolutely no use when they got soaked, nor for that matter were my "waterproof" trousers or jacket. When conditions get that extreme you find out that there is no such thing as waterproof. I spent 10mins waiting at the bottom of the glaciar at 5,000m for the rest of the party to arrive. Underprepared Austrian man proceeded to inform us that he coulnd`t climb the Pan de Azucar in such conditions and this was roundly backed up by eccentric German man. So, we didn`t climb the Pan de Azucar and didn´t even see the famous Pulpito de Diablo which was less than 60m away from us - when you are in the middle of a storm it is hard to see beyond what is immediately in front of you.

We returned slightly chastened by the experience and were completely soaked. Luckily things cleared up in the afternoon and we treated to some great views of the mountains from our camp and were also able to dry (some of) our clothes. At this point underprepared Austrian man and eccentric German man started talking a lot in German rather than Spanish or English. This obviously meant that they were scheming. As it turns out their chat revolved around what they should do if the weather continued to give us trouble.

As it happens it didn´t rain that night although I woke up to find ice outside the tent that I was sharing with underprepared Austrian man. As soon as we had eaten breakfast and started to move the rain started. Eccentric German had arranged for a horse to come along and pick up all his "luggage" the previous day instead of walking with it to the next camp spot. It was probably a wise move. Rucksacks with clothes in are not waterproof and the last thing you need is no dry clothes. As we walked through wind and rain for the best part of six hours I did begin to wander why I enjoy hiking in the mountains so much when it really isn´t much fun in bad weather. We finally arrived at the stunning Laguna de la Plaza in the early afternoon in one of the few periods of "dryness". Tents quickly went up before the rain started although it was a bit of a struggle given we were warding off the frostbite from our hands.

In the late afternoon things cleared up a bit and we enjoyed the scerenity of the laguna and the surrounding mountains. As all the clothes in my rucksack were soaked from the walk in the rain and wind I had no choice but to stay in the slightly less wet "waterproof" clothes that I was wearing. The night was spent listening to the rain beat against the tent. It stopped at about 3am and I thought that meant that it was clearing up outside.

I got up at around 7am and slipped on the ice outside my tent. After managing to haul myself up I looked up to see the mountains surrounding the laguna to be coated intermittently in snow. It was a truly awe-inspiring sight. However, underprepared Austrian man did not seem to be appreciating the beauty of it all. A "crisis" meeting was called and all members of the Cabinet were invited to give their views on whether we should continue to stay at the Laguna or return to the village of Cocuy a day early. Eccentric German man and underprepared Austrian man said that we should go back a day early. I voted to stay and tough it out as you never know when things will clear up in the mountains. The guide sided with me and said that if we walked back that day we may end up doing so in worse conditions than if we braved it out. However, he also said he was a "facilitator" and didn`t have a vote. Eccentric German man´s girlfriend wasn´t really given a chance to say anything as her boyfriend told us in Spanish so that she couldn´t understand that she "should really go back as she is finding it tough" even though she had earlier said that she wanted to stay. Well, that was me outvoted fairly easily. I went into the tent to pack only to find that underprepared Austrian man had already packed all his stuff before the "crisis meeting". Clearly, I had been the victim of some sneaky political deal hatched by the German speaking folk.

As it turned out we got the very worst conditions on the walk back to Cocuy with all our backpacks weighing more as they were soaked. The guide and I were not in the best of moods as we felt on the wrong end of a poor decision - especially, the guide who had to carry about twice as much as the rest of us. I could hardly lift his bag. We walked for several hours through snow, wind, rain etc. Suddenly, in the early afternoon everything cleared up and there was hot sunshine. If only we had stayed we would have enjoyed the Laguna de La Plaza at its best. However, neither of the two protagonists were willing to accept this. Given that, the last few hours of the walk back were spectacular and I did enjoy them.

Back in Cocuy we went out for some rum and beers. Underprepared Austrian man was in high spirits and I decided to enjoy the festivities rather than sulk. The following day we did a day hike from Cocuy minus underprepared Austrian man (he had opted to go back to Bogota a day early) and it was surprisingly enjoyable. Eccentric German man spent most of the time hatching plans for motorbike trips in the Colombian mountains and it didn´t actually rain. The weather looked fairly miserable from the direction although I still thought it would have been worth staying the extra day in the mountains for the hour a day of good weather.

Given the incredibly beauty of Cocuy, I have resolved to return one day to see the mountain landscapes and lagunas at their best. Who knows, it might even be next year...

San Agustin & El desierto Tatacoa

amil_patel — Tue, 2 Jun 2009 15:10:00 GMT

San Agustin

San Agustin is a place of lush green landscapes, river valleys and random pre-Colombian statues. It has to be one of the most pleasent and laid back places in all of Colombia. I passed a few days there hiking around the countryside and stumbling across random statues dating back to hundreds of years before Christ. When a couple of us hired a guide to explain to us some of the history behind San Agustin it became apparent to me that archaeologists use the technique of MSU (Make Sh1t Up) to come up with their theories. They have about as much idea as you or I as to the meaning of some of the statues around there - we were told that the person holding a baby in the one of the statues could be either trying to protect it from death or trying to strangle it. Now, they seem like two fairly divergent explanations to me. However, saying all of this, I found the tour and information that guide gave us quite interesting.

Another day was spent horseriding to various archaeological sites around San Agustin. It was the first time that I`ve been horseriding and a couple of my friends persuaded me to go. It took me a while to get into it but once I learnt how to get the horse to cut other people up and run them off the road it was quite good fun. My horse was slightly lacking in assertiveness skills but after a few hours of training, Lucy, soon learnt not to let the other horses run roughshod over her...

The Tatacoan Desert

It was slightly surreal to find a desert all of 5 hrs from the lush green landscapes of San Agustin but this is Colombia and one constant is the country`s capacity to surprise. The Tatacoan desert is not formed of sand dunes but looks like a mini Monument Valley with its red clay looking formations and landscapes. It is a bit out of the way to get to and barely any "gringos" make it there which means you are a minor celebrity if you do. Unsurprisngly, the conditions are slightly inhospitable out in the desert but you can have a good wander around the wierd rock formations late in the afternoon or early in the morning. There`s even an observatory for star gazing. While wandering around it did occur to me that the desert would be the perfect place to open up a hostel as it is one of the few places in Colombia left with no hostel...

What getting your visa renewed tells you about Colombia

amil_patel — Mon, 1 Jun 2009 15:21:00 GMT

How bureaucracies and bureaucrats go about their business can tell you a lot about a country. Colombia is no different. For example, a few days ago I had to go the immigration office in Popayan to get my visa extended for another month. In theory, the process is relatively straightforward and involves taking your passport, two photocopies of it and photos to the immigration office. You should then be asked to deposit 68,000 pesos into a government bank account and upon presentation of the paying in slip at the immigration office they will give you the necessary stamp. The requirement to deposit the money in a government bank account is to avoid immigration officials pocketing the visa extention money for themselves. (Lesson 1: officially, Colombia takes corruption seriously and will do everything possible to be seen as less corrupt than other Latin American countries)

The actual process was somewhat more inefficient and amusing than the "official" one. On turning up to the immigration building I was handed a visitors pass and informed that I was to wear it around my neck at all times by some security guard brandishing a gun around. The "extranjeros" office was relatively easy to find and I was pleased to see that there was only one other person there. The señor waved me in and began the "interview".

It was all straightforward and involved probing questions such as "how do you like Colombia" and "tell me about all the places that you`ve been to". He seemed impressed with some of the places I`ve been to and we ended up talking about where I wanted to go next and where else I should go. (Lesson 2: Colombians are very nice people and are genuinely pleased to see foreigners in their country. They also love talking...)

After our little exchange of notes on Colombia the señor informed me that it was my lucky day and I wouldn`t need to go to the bank to deposit the 68,000 pesos. At no extra cost, I could give him the money and save myself the effort of going to the bank. As it happened he had a "ready made" paying in slip with all the relevant stamps but with someone elses name on it. Apparently, she didn`t need her visa extension in the end but went through the whole process anyway. I didn`t really understand how this was all possible especially as the girl next to me seemed to be having the same luck but at times like this it is always best to deploy the "no questions asked and do what they do tell you policy". (Lesson 3: even when engaging in blatantly corrupt activities Colombians still want to give it a semblance of legitimacy. If this had been in Mexico or Guatemala niether of us would have pretended what was going on was anything other than corrupt. They would have told me to give them a certain amount of money, we would have haggled a bit over the "fee", they would have stamped my passport and we would be done with it. There would be none of this nonsense of fake paying in slips etc).

Continuing with the "official" process I was told to go to the photocopy shop to get some copies of my passport. "Don`t worry about it señor, I`ve already got them" I told him. "Oh no sir, that won`t do, I need them all one page and with the paying in slip on the page as well. Let me just tipex out this other señora`s name off the slip and put yours on it". (Lesson 4: it never pays to be prepared in Colombia. Just roll with it and it will all work out in the end")

After getting the photocopies I returned to office and tried to pay the señor with 100,000 pesos. The señor politely informed me that he didn`t have any change so I would have to go and find some for him. Oh, and while I was at it I should go to the photoshop and get two passport photos. (Lesson 5: even in corrupt transactions the onus is on the non-bureaucrat to go to all the effort. Power lies with bureaucrat)

The girl who was also getting her visa extended seemed to be going through a similar process. However, I looked across to see her having her hair rearranged by the señora in charge of her visa renewal. "That looks much better. You will look so much more beautiful in the photo with your hair like this". The girly looked completely bemused by this but took it in the right spirit. (Lesson 6: even for something as minor as a passport photo you need to look your best in Colombia).

As I waited for my photos to come out I went hunting for the change that the señor had requested. The only place that seemed like it might have change was a cafe nearby. I was forced to buy an 800 pesos emapanda, which I didn`t really want to get change for my 50,000 peso note. Only, the lady told me that she didn´t have any change and would be forced to send an errand boy to get some. Fine, my photos aren`t done in any case. (Lesson 7: nobody ever has change for 50,000 peso notes.)

Twenty minutes later neither my change nor photos were ready. I told the lady to forget her empanada and that I would look for my change elsewhere. She suddenly put some urgency into the quest for change and headed for the photoshop to get it. After telling her that I was going there myself and I didn`t want the empanada I returned to the photoshop to find my photos were ready. I receive my photos to discover that unbeknown to me I am actually wearing a suit. The man in the "studio" had spent 20 minutes superimposing my head on a suit. (Lesson 8: Official means offical in Colombia. That means you need to look smart. A polo short just won´t do).

I returned to the immigration office armed with my change and photos. I entered the office to find the señora with a big smile across her face looking at the girl´s photos. "Oh, you look so beautiful with your hair like that. Your husband will love you even more now". (Lesson 9: the onus is on wives to impress their husbands. Latino men need to make no effort whatsoever once they are married - apart from if they want a mistress of course)

I thought the process would end with the exchange of money and stamps but there was an extra stage - taking my fingerprints. You would normally expect someone to take prints of your thum and index fingers. Not in Colombia. They needed prints of every single finger. The señor informed me that this was if "interpol" needed my details at any stage in the future they could trace me back to Colombia with all the paperwork in order. (Lesson 10: Colombia is at the forefront of combatting international crime and won´t be accused of not taking every conceivable measure in the war against drugs)

All this in a grand total of 2 1/2 hrs and I even got my visa extended. (Lesson 11: Colombia actually works and is a relatively efficient country).

Coffee Country - Don Elias, Wax Palm Trees & Finca Villa Maria

amil_patel — Mon, 25 May 2009 00:52:00 GMT

I've spent the last week in Colombia's "Zona Cafatera" which is an area of verdant hills, exotic bird life, wax palm trees (well, in the valle cocara at least)and coffee (sometimes it is important to state the obvious). The first few days of the week were spent in Salento which is a small town famed for its trout and proximity to the Valle Cocara. The highlight of my time in Salento was not the hike around the Valle Cocara (stunning though it was) but a visit to the Finca of Don Elias which is about an hour hike from Salento.

Don Elias is the Clint Eastwood of coffee farming. In a shootout of coffee farmers he'd be the last man standing. He is that cool. He is a 70 year old coffee farmer who has been in the business his whole adult life and is exactly how you would imagine a Colombian coffee farmer should be: a slightly wrinkled face complete with white moustache and he wears a white cowboy hat, blue denim shirt, jeans and wellington boots. All his attire is slightly muddied to give him an authentic look and he carries a finely sharpened machete for all occasions. Frankly, even a Latin American media star like myself was starstruck in his presence. As it turns out, Don Elias is also a very nice guy and is keen to show all comers around his finca and explain to them the coffee making process from start to finish. We went around the finca picking coffee for half an hour and afterwards Don Elias showed me how the coffee beans are pealed, dried, roasted and ground to produce the coffee that we get in our Starbucks cups. It was quite an enlightening experience. After the tour around we sat around drinking coffee, talking and enjoying the scenery.

The day before the Don Elias experience I'd been to the Valle Cocara which is a valley of wax palm trees near Salento. Some of them are up to 60m high and it seems strange to find such vegetation at over 2000m. Everything is "green" around the valle de cocara and hiking among the greenery and clouds can be a slightly surreal experience at times. However, as you climb further up you come across humming birds and there is a bird sanctuary at the top of the climb. Overall, it is well worth spending a few days in the area around Salento to enjoy the spectacular scenery.

Following Salento I moved onto the Villa Finca Maria. It is a large Finca near Perreira that sees maybe one or two visitors every couple of weeks yet is one of the most spectacular fincas in all of Colombia. As it isn't in any guide book nobody really goes there but it is a truly enchanting place. It is set at the top of a series of fincas and is a working coffee and platano farm. There is an outdoor swimming pool, great hospitality, hammocks and good hikes. All in all, those who do make there aren't disappointed - just don't expect thronging nighlife.

Manizales - El Nevado Ruiz, hot springs and getting my hair cut...

amil_patel — Sat, 16 May 2009 14:55:00 GMT

I`ve spent the last few days in Manizales which is the in the middle of Colombia`s Zona Cafatera (Coffee Country). The city itself is a fairly standard commerical city but it has a backdrop of stunning green hills and mountains. Whichever direction you look in there is green.

While I`ve been here I`ve managed to catch up with the Profes from the trip to the Cuidad Perdida a couple of times - it was good fun reminiscing about the jungle adventure and exchanging entertaining anecdotes of what we`ve been doing in the intervening weeks.

El Nevado Ruiz...

The other day I made a trip to El Nevado Ruiz, a volcano of 5,300m. The strange thing about this peak is that you go to about 4,800m in a van - apparently, it is the fifth highest road in the world. Most of the time you can only climb to 5,000m due to the snow and difficult conditions. Our guide told us that we probably would only make it to 4,900m as there has been a lot of snow in the last few weeks and it was dangerous. We got to about 4,900m and it didn`t seem particularly dangerous to me - a couple of us just continued walking on so the guide didn`t have much option but to let us keep climbing. At 5,000m a few people stopped and the guide told us that we could go up to 5,100m if we wanted. It is actually quite hard climbing at those altitudes but that might just be because I try walking too quickly. Anyhow, we did have to stop at 5,100m although going further didn`t seem particularly dangerous to me. The problem with tourism in some parts of Colombia is that it is too well regulated. If the Nevado Ruiz were in Guatemala I have no doubts we`d have gone to the summit - still it was a great experience and the scenery is spectacular around there.

Termales de Santa Rosa...

The other day trip that I really enjoyed near Manizales was to the hot springs at Santa Rosa (thanks to Andrés for the recommendation). Apart from Fuentes Georginas (Xela) these are the most spectacular and "hot" hot springs that I`ve been to. They are set at the foot of some waterfalls in the spectacular countryside around Manizales. The water comes out of the springs at around 70C but cools down to 40C in the pool - you can only stay in there for 10-15m at a time before it is time to cool off under the waterfall. Muy Chevere.

And now, that hair cut...

Despite speaking very decent Spanish I am still more than capable of committing the odd howler. For example, the other day I went for a hair cut. All appeared to be going well after my instructions of "can you cut it in the same style as it is now and take 2-3cm off the top" (I haven`t quite worked out yet the equivalent of "grade three, back and sides"). After the lady had finished with her masterpiece I realised that I could probably do with her thinning out my hair and sideburns a bit. I couldn`t quite remember the word for sideburns but thought it might be "pestañas". So I asked her "usted puede ralear el pelo y las pestañas tambien". The hairdresser looked slightly mortified by this so I guessed that I might have got the word wrong. So I pointed to my sideburns and asked here to remind me what they are in Spanish - "those would be your patillas mi amor, you just asked me to thin out your eyelashes". Doh. I mean doesn`t your average Colombian male ask their hairdresser to thin out their eyelashes? And why can`t the Spanish language at least give you a hint that "pestañas" may have something to do with your eyes - at least English has the word "eye" before "lashes" to give you a hint that "eyelashes" might have something to do with your eyes...

May Day protests, culture and a city on the move - welcome to Bogotá

amil_patel — Tue, 5 May 2009 21:58:00 GMT

It`s big, cosmoplitan, sophisticated, has great museums, restaurants and your chances of being run over are relatively low. No, I`m not describing Buenos Aires. I am in fact in Bogotá, the city that is single handedly defying the global financial crisis and is expected to grow 10% this year. Ok, so it`s not all great - I know of at least two people who have been robbed at night in the Candelaria area but that is fairly standard for a big Latin American city. However, on the whole, Bogota is a surprisingly well ordered Latin America city with plenty to keep you busy for a while.

I got in to Bogota last Friday (1st May) and found myself watching the globally ubiquitous May Day "demonstrations". The "demonstrators", most of whom looked like 70s punk rockers, took it upon themselves to graffiti the city`s main square (Plaza Bolivar) and smash the windows of banks. The poor Banco de Colombia seemed to take the brunt of the abuse but still appears to be in better shape than either HBOS or RBS. It was quite a spectacle watching the demonstrators being sprayed with tear gas by the Colombian Police. Unfortunately, I wasn`t brave enough to take my camera with me to capture some the scene - you never know what may constitute you being seen as a beacon of capitalism and legitimate target.

Since Friday, things have been a lot more sedate in the city and life seems to have returned to normal. Saturday was spent taking a four hour walk around the city absorbing the atmosphere around Bogotá. On Sunday I took a ride on the cable car to the top of Cerro Monserate which overlooks the city. There are great views of Bogotá and beyond from the cable car - the city itself is surrounded by various mountains and stretches far into the distance.

Of the museums, I rationed myself a bit as I`m likely to come back here in a few weeks. I visited the museo del oro which, unsurprisingly, has a lot of gold in it and charts the history of valuable metal usage through Colombian history. The Museo de la Policia is another excellent museum with a particularly interesting exhibit, complete with artefacts, of the police`s "hunt" for Pablo Escobar and his gruesome end. However, my favourite so far (and thanks to compadre Pablo for recommending it) has been the Museo del Banco Reformador - it has a great exhibit of photography from the Amazon jungle and has definitely put me in the mood for a trip to the Amazon before I leave Colombia. My friend Pablo also showed me around his university, which was quite interesting - the university has been the source of 29 Colombia presidents although he was fairly adement that he wouldn`t be joining the club.

Another notable achievement over the last few weeks is that I finally appear to have mastered the "drinking from a plastic bag" technique that is a pre-requisite for any self-respecting Latino. After months of failure I can now pierce the bag in the right place and drink its contents without making it look like I´ve wet myself and have bystanders laugh at me. We live in exciting times.

San Gil - paragliding, rafting and making my colombian tv debut...

amil_patel — Sat, 25 Apr 2009 21:52:00 GMT

I´ve spent the last few days in the self-styled "Adventure Capital" of Colombia and it hasn´t disappointed. It has been a little bit expensive (well, relative to everything else I´ve done) but has definitely been "extreme" at times. The highlits have definitely been paragliding over the Chicamocha Canyon and Rafting in the Río Suarez...

Paragliding over the Chicamocha Canyon

Sergio, my instructor, picks me up from the hostel at 8am and we make our way to the Chicamocha Canyon in his clapped up 24 year old Renault. I´m not sure why he´s so insistent that it is the best car in the world when it patently is not but I don´t bother contradicting him.

We arrive at the Chicamocha Canyon to find Television Colombia there for a report on "extreme sports". They seem quite excited that there is a foreigner around and ask me for an interview. First Guatemalan radio, now Colombian tv. The Colombian tv reporter is particulary hot - she´s from Medellin so she´s bound to be...she asks me what I think of Colombia, if I´m scared about the flight etc. It´s more straightforward than the Guatemalan radio interview as it only lasts for a minute or so. Sergio seems a little pissed off that they don´t want to speak to him - sorry Sergio but only professiols with experience can be on tv. haha.

The paraglide itself is an incredible experience and affords great view of the canyon. It crosses my mind that it is a fairly big drop to the bottom of the canyon if something were to go wrong while we are up in the air. Luckily, everything seems is perfect working order apart from my camera which failes to work in the extreme conditions (no photos of this adventure unfortunately). Sergio comments that I´m extremely calm - normally, people scream out of shear terror. In order to remove me from my zen like state Sergio proceeds to do some more extreme manoeuvres in the air - twists, big drops in a few seconds etc. It is quite an adrenalin rush.

After 45 mins in the air I´m back on firm ground and the camera crew get my landing. The cameraman asks me for a few words so I tell him that "the views are spectacular and it is definitely worthwhile." He asks me if I was scared and I answer fairly honestly with "no". Not sure that makes for great tv...

The cute reporter lands 10 mins later after her flight. The camera crew run towards her and ask for some words - "I´m in shock, it´s an incredible experience but absoultely terrifying. You need to be very brave to do it". TV reporters are such dramatists. I go over to ask her what it was really like but find her hunched over a plastic bag emptying the contents of her stomach. Maybe she was telling the truth...she tells me she is struggling with her breathing. Would it be impolitik to ask her if she needs any help with her respiration? I restrict myself to some words of encouragement by telling her that it is very scary and she´s been very brave...

Rafting in the Río Suarez

I´ve never been rafting before so wasn´t really sure what to expect. There are two rafting options around San Gil - the Río Fonce (class 1-2 rapids) and Río Suarez (class 2-5). I was going to do the Río Fonce rafting but someone at the hostel convinced me that it would be much more fun doing the "extreme" ones. Not one to turn down an extreme adventure I didn´t really take much convincing.

We turn up at the Río Suarez and get nearly 30 mins worth of instructions. Here are some of the highlights:

"For those of who haven´t done rafting before, class 5 are the most difficult ones that you are allowed to do in a raft. You can only do class 6 in a kayak." (nobody told me this before the trip. I guess that´s why I had to sign that bit of paper saying the company doesn´t take any responsibility if I die...)

"If the raft flips or you get thrown out of it remember to hold your paddle, the rope on the side of the raft and put your feet in the air. As long as you hold the rope we will be able to rescue you fairly quickly as someone can pull you back in. These rapids are dangerous so if you let go of the rope it will be more difficult to rescue you."

The key takeout from the sermon appears to be "don´t fall out of the raft, it´ll be a lot easier for all of us" although one of my team appears quite keen to fall out in the middle of a rapid as "it will be more fun".

We start off with a Class 2 rapid which is still quite scary but quite a thrill. I begin to wonder what a class 5 will be like. We do a few Class 4´s and 3´s - it is quite an adrenalin rush when the raft is up in the air as you are going over rapids. Our rowing coordination when is all over the place when going over high waves and water is rushing into the raft but everyone is having a lot of fun.

We pause for a little bit and our instructor informs us that we will be doing our first Class 5. "The river is quite high today and a little more dangerous than normal so there is a chance that the raft will flip when we do the Class 5. Remember, if the raft flips hold onto your paddle and the rope and put your feet in the air." Or, just don´t fall out...

We start going into the rapid and it quickly becomes clear that this one could be a bit extreme. We hit the middle - the raft starts to flip over on to its side and I seem to be in the worst place. The guy in front of me appears to be falling out and I start to watch but forget about myself. I fall out and am fairly sure that the raft has flipped. I cling onto the rope for dear life as the rapid starts to suck me in. I´m underwater with the raft dragging me along as it continues to traverse along the rapid. The paddle goes - if it´s a choice between the paddle and the rope there´s only one winner. Ummm...I´m fairly sure the instructor said it would be a quick rescue as long as I keep hold of the rope - this "rescue" seems to be taking an awful lot longer than I would have envisaged. Finally somebody decides to haul me back into the raft when we have traversed the rapid, after a good 30 seconds of me nearly drowning. The guy who was keen to fall into the river is looking at me with admriation - "dude, how lucky are you, what was it like? You´ve definitely got the best value for money out of any of us." I guess that´s one way of looking at it...

I recount my underwater adventure to the rest of the crew and they all say that they were sure that the raft had flipped but at the last minute our instructor managed to balance it sufficiently to avoid everyone going under.

We traverse another Class 5 and I make sure that I don´t fall out this time by taking extra caution and concentrating on myself rather than what might happen to the person in front of me. Believe me, falling into a Class 5 rapid once is plenty of extreme adventure for one day. When we are back on dry land after 1.5hrs one the crew who has done this a few times tells us newbies that we are really lucky as that is one of the best she has ever done. Apparently, there are usually parts of the river where you can get a break from the rapids but this one is fairly continuous and strong. Great. But where´s the camera crew? I´m expecting tve or tv colombia to be waiting for an interview given my new found celebrity status. I´ve even got dramatic words this time.

Relaxing in Mompox

amil_patel — Sat, 18 Apr 2009 21:44:00 GMT

After the Cuiadad Perdida jungle adventure I spent a few days on the Colombian Carribean Coast in Taganga (with the remaining straddlers from the Cuidad Perdida Trek) and in the idyllic Parque Tayrona. There´s not really much to write about the Parque Tayrona apart from the fact that you have several unspoilt, undeveloped beaches and turquoise/emerald green/ blue ocean. There´s not much to do apart from swim in the ocean, enjoy the seafood, swing in a hammock, read a book and get eaten alive by mosquitoes.

I headed to Mompox after returning from my ocean days. Things got off to a less than ideal start when the "door to door" service that my hostel ordered for me failed to show up at 4am. After asking the hostel owner how I might find my way to Mompox I was reliably informed that I could get a direct bus to El Banco and then a boat to Mompos. Sounded easy enough. I turned up at the bus station to find that I would have to change at a place called Cuatro Vientos to get to El Banco. Cuatro Vientos wasn´t marked on any map that I looked and there´s a good reason why...it consists of a few shacks on a road crossing. From Cuatro Vientos it was a collectivo to El Banco and another 3 hrs on a bumpy road to Mompox. After getting up at 4am, I finally got into Mompox at 6pm. The "travelling" part is definitely the least glamorous part of "travelling".

Mompox is a bit like stepping back in time to a Colombia slightly isolated from the modern day pace of life. It is definitely more Garcia Marquez than Shakira (many say it resembles the Macondo from 100 years of solitude) and has a great charm to it. There really isn´t much to do here apart from "hacer un relax". The colonial buildings here are well preserved and the local residents can be seen sitting out in the street in their rocking chairs watching the bats fly overhead at dusk. For the tourist all you have to do is soak up the local atmosphere, watch the locals play dominoes, read a book in one of the several plazas, drink fruit juice (guava is particularly nice) and swing away in a rocking chair like the locals do.

Mompox maybe isn´t the most happening town in Colombia but it is a great place to wile away a few days not doing very much in a place where time seems to stand still.

Jungle Adventure - Trekking to the Cuidad Perdida

amil_patel — Fri, 10 Apr 2009 23:14:00 GMT

Mensaje para mis compadres de este viaje

Esta caminata fue una de las mas impresionantes que yo he hecho. La belleza de la selva, las ruinas, los saltos locos de las piedras y arboles etc. Pero, tambien el humor y ambiente de este viaje fue muy especial. Gracias a ustedes. Creo que teníamos suerte con nuestro grupo y los guías. !Que chevre¡ Por favor, agreguen unos commentarios abajo de sus momentos favoritos y mi cuenta del viaje. Estoy seguro que me he olvidado de escribir de muchas cosas divertidas del viaje...

Ok. So now for the part that my normal readers are going to understand. If you´re in Colombia and have six days to spare I´d recommend going on the trek to the Cuidad Perdida. It is basically a six day hike through the jungle which includes numerous river crossings, stunning rolling mountains covered in lush vegetation, encounters with the Colombian army and a stunning set of ruins set high in the mountains. Here`s my short account of the six day trip...

Day 1 (Walking in the sun...)

It is hot, we´ve got a long way to walk and we have no idea if it will be easy or difficult. The group meets up and we jump in the jeep to get to the entrance of the Parque Nacional de la Sierra Nevada. Everyone seems in good spirits and the Colombians among us seem particularly talkative. We stop on the route for a cerveza - it´s Semana Santa after all. We enter the national park and have our first encounter with the mean looking army dudes. They´re actually very friendly and amiable and we pose for photos with them.

Following lunch we set off. We reach our first river crossing and everyone gets across safely - first test passed fairly comfortably despite the odd sticky moment. The the uphill begins...the local among us (wittily nicknamed Costeño) starts to ask how much uphill there is and that the walk is much harder than he thought. I´ve got news for you Costeño - there´s a reason why they´re called mountains...The secenry is simply stunning - rolling mountain scenery covered in jungle with the sound of rivers around every other corner.

After a hard three hours of walking in the hot sun we split into two groups. One group gets the short straw and has to walk a lot further to their camp - I get lucky. Following an early dinner Las Profes decide that 7.30ish is an appropriate hour to retire to the hammocks to sleep - they must be really tired - in fact, this isn´t a one-off...it´s their usual bedtime.

Day 2 (walking in the jungle...)

We are deep into the jungle now and get some shade from all dense vegetation around us. There is a lot of downhill amongst the odd uphill. Everyone makes a note that this means that day 5 is going to be hard as we have to return the same way. I put to good use the "running" technique for the downhills. This generally involves pegging it as fast as possible downhill to make it a bit more fun and adventerous (and to save the pain on my knees of having to break all the time). Everyone is walking well today although Costeño is debating whether he should do the last 2 days in one as he needs to return a day early - something about it being muy exigente.

We finish walking quite early. The other group start talking of the "great rock which you could jump off with a drop of 5m". My group appears to have missed out. Damn. There is a nice river near the camp and we go for a swim. I manage to mess up and let the current take me away and bang myself across some rocks. Ouch. As we return a group of viejitos turn up to the camp looking fairly fresh - they´ve done two days in one. Some members of the group start to feel slightly embarrassed.

Costeño provides the evening entertainment by miserably failing to execute a card trick. He spends the remainder of the evening castiagado trying to work out what went wrong. The rest of us pass another uncomfortable night in the hammocks listening to los roncidos of various members of our party and getting bitten by the mosquitos.

Day 3 (the ruins)

Today is the day we are going to reach La Cuidad Perdida and it´s going to be hard. We set off early. Reaching the city involves a total of ten river crossings, including eight in an hour at one point. As the river crossings start I go from being miles ahead of everyone to behind. My feet are killing me going barefoot through the rivers on rocks - I`m not made for walking without shoes. The only consolation is that we can jump into the river to cool off and have a swim. Pablo, Emily and Michaella have the river crossing technique down to a tee - leave your shoes on - they may get wet but it´s preferable to hurting feet.

After the river crossings we reach the bottom of the Cuidad Perdida - 1200 steps to climb to reach it. Our guide tells us it´ll take about 40 mins. No problem - people seem to be expecting me to do it very quickly. I manage it in 12 mins and wait 10 mins for the next person to arrive. Manage to get some good photos in while waiting for everyone. The next challenge is a race up the next set of steps with Ender and Costeño. I´m actually starting to get a little tired but everything goes once I reach the main part of the Cuidad Perdida. The ruins are set with stunning views of the mountainous jungle background with waterfalls falling from great heights.

Andres spends a lot of time clowning around on the main site of the city. He´s posing for some silly photos when some heavy looking army dudes approach him while he´s lying down. Luckily, they`re actually quite cool and we spend the rest of the afternoon asking them questions about being in the army. One of the chaps kindly decides to do show us how to put together and pull apart a rifle in 25 seconds. I start to wonder what would happen if there were a sudden attack on us - these army dudes seem to spend more time hanging out with toursits instead of actually looking for guerrilleros.

Costenño and I seem to get the short straws and have the hammocks to sleep in. Everyone else gets beds...

Day 4 (the glorious sunrise)

Get up at 5.30am to watch the sunrise with Andres and Costeño. Muy chevre. The jungle around from atop the ruins is really stunning as the sun starts to appear. We take advantage of the lack of people around and take a ton of photos.

We have a wander around the ruins as a group and then start the trek back. I´ve learnt my lesson - the shoes stay on for the river crossing. I decide it will be better to use the running technique for the dowhill parts - I teach it to Costeño and we arrive well ahead of everyone at one of the river crossings. We find a nice rock to jump off and do numerous jumps into the river from a few metres up.

The rest of the day passes off somewhat uneventfully apart from Bryan aka King Kong being abused by one of the guide´s seven year old kid.

Bryan: "so, what do you think of when someone says king kong"

Norbeye: "someone big and fat". Don`t hold back there Norbeye...

Day 5 (the day of the tree jump)

We get up early to go to the spot where half our group did the rock jump from 5m on the first day. I do the rock jump is quite cool. Saul, one of the guides, points to one of the trees overhanging the river and tells us that some crazy fool once jumped from one of the branches of the tree into the river - everyone conservatively puts the jump into the water at 8m (Í reckon it is 10m). Why is Costeño scampering towards the tree? He climbs the tree (don´t fall Costeño or you´re going to die on the rocks...). He does the jump. Well, if he can do it. Andres does it next. I guess that means that I have to do it. I climb the tree and as I am doing so the realisation sets in that if I fall as I´m crossing the branch I´m going to hit my head on some nasty looking rocks far below. In fact, it looks an awful way down from the top of the tree. Everything is ready - Andres has set the video rolling and everyone is shouting words of encouragement such as "get on with it you chicken". The countdown - 1,2,3...I´m still in the tree as everyone is expecting me to hit the water. After another aborted attempt I realise that I´m going to be stuck up in the tree all my life if I don´t jump. I jump. After an interminable few seconds i hit the water - an amazing experience (the video is on facebook...)

We continue the trek and the long uphill starts. It isn´t as hard as I thought it would be but I don´t admit that to the rest of the group - the whines of Costeño can be heard in Santa Marta. We eventually split into two groups and my group gets the hard trek to our camp. The evening is spent playing chess and various other board games. Las Profes break their record and stay up until nearly 9pm.

Day 6 (the day of the waterfall)

We get up early to find the Señor pruning some dried leaves. He informs us in a very matter of fact way that is marijuana. Apparently, lots of foreigners like to smoke it, particularly Israelis and you can only buy this high-quality variety in the jungles of Colombia. He´s never tried the stuff of course he hastens to add. For a fee of 25,000 pesos he will also show you how they process cocaine although he doesn´t cultivate the stuff himself. We go to a spectacular waterfall which you have to climb down the side of to get to the bottom. The scenery here really is breathtaking.

We start the final days walking in earnest and embark on our last two river crossings. These are done across rocks that stick out of the river. I manage to fall and get my shoes wet. Costeño is making fun of me when he manages to fall into the river and lose his backpack in there while he´s at it. Haha.

The remaining hour of the trek passes off without anything of note and we all unite for a final group photo and lunch before going off on our separate ways.

The trek to the Cuidad Perdida is a truly unique experience with lots of great scenery and adventure. A definite highlight of my trip so far.

Cartagena and initial musings on Colombia

amil_patel — Thu, 2 Apr 2009 22:15:00 GMT

So, I finally left Xela, Guatemala, after five incredible months. It was a real wrench to leave but in the end I thought I'd end up regretting it if I didn't take the opportunity to see some other countries. And now to Colombia. My flight to Colombia was fairly undramatic and it just shows that flying can be without debacles as long as choose any airline apart from BA and American...

Cartagena in Colombia is a fairly spectacular Colonial city. In fact, it is probably the best I've seen in my time in Latin America. The centro historico has some incredibly beautiful buildings and the general setting of the City on the ocean makes a great backdrop. The newer part of the city has some impressive high rise buildings that somehow make for a great skyline instead of ruining the city. All in all it's definitely a must see. The other day I went to a "volcano" called volcan lodo de totumo. Now, after climbing various awe inspiring volcanos in Guatemala it was somewhat of a joke to see a 28m mound being described as a volcano. However, the thing spouts out mud instead of lava and you can take a mud bath which apparently has therapeutic qualities. It was a little different but nonetheless interesting. Other than that, I've spent the last few days wandering around the city and generally taking in all the great buildings.

Now, my initial thoughts on Colombia...

1. It's hot, like, seriously hot. But that might just be Cartagena. The interior of the country can't possibly be this hot. Mind you, I've just spent the last 5 months at more than 2000m so I was bound to find it hot at sea level.

2. Why can't people on the coast speak spanish like Guatemalans. From being able to pretty much listen in on other peoples conversations on the streets I'm basically back at the point where I stare at people with the "what the hell are you saying to me look". Luckily, I can say whatever I need to and understand when people speak to me normally i.e. don't speak spanish to me with a Jamacian accent...

3. The army and police are all over the place. Coming from Guatemala where "law enforcement" and the "law" generally don't exist it's quite comforting to know that Colombians take the law quite seriously...

4. Seems like Colombia is a fairly rich country. Well, with all that drug money over the years some of it had to find it's way to the general populace...

Being a locutor on the radio in Xela

amil_patel — Tue, 17 Mar 2009 21:55:00 GMT

I`m not exactly sure how, but a few days ago I made my "debut" on one of the radio stations in Xela. It appears that my trip to the crater of Santiaguito is something that people around Xela find quite exciting - everyone that I have spoken to either wants to go, has complete respect for my adventure or thinks I´m completely crazy. Anyhow, one of my compañeros from the trip, Steve, sent me an message saying that someone his Spanish teacher knows has a sports show on the radio and that they wanted to interview us. I was minded to go as long as I`d finished my work for Don Eduardo - I`m helping with publicity etc at the moment for his company Kaqchikel tours.

The day of the interview...

I´m sitting in Don Eduardo´s office, minding my own business and getting on with my work when in comes Steve. He wants to speak with Eduardo about the radio interview when he spots me. He seems awfully keen that I go to the interview - something about it being good to have someone to speak for the half hour that we have to fill. Afterwards, he starts to ask Eduardo if it is ok to mention the name of his agency and if there is anything we shouldn´t say on air. Eduardo gets all animated and says that under no circumstances should we mention that he took us to the actual crater of Santiaguito - apparently it is not permitted to go to the crater because of some decree that the Municipalidad have issued. I assure him that we will do nothing of the sort and head off to the interview.

As we arrive for the interview the general lack of organisation and prepping seems fairly standard for Guatemala. In fact, the preparation for the interview is non-existent. The interviewer gets us to write down our names and starts to talk about the programme. I get somewhat disconcerted when he introduces us "professional alpinistas" but I guess it´s all part of building up the drama. As I turn towards Steve and Jesse, I notice a lot of gesticulating at the interviewer suggesting that he should shove the microphone in front of me when he wants to ask any questions. Hmmm... I´m slightly startled by the lack of focus of the first question - "what do you want to say about the trip to the Crater?". I´m secretly thinking that i should answer with "well, what do you want to ask me?" but instead politely start talking about how the trip was an extreme adventure, a very tough trek even for a professional alpinista like me (well, you`ve got to live up to expectations), it´s like being on the moon etc.

After a few minutes of recounting the trip he asks me a couple more questions which i manage to answer without too much drama. Things start to decline somewhat when he starts to ask some questions to my compañeros. I start to understand why Steve was so keen to have me there. Of the numerous debacles that occur as they start/attempt to answer questions is when the subject changes to their 3 day hike to Lake Atitlan. Steve asks the guy to give me the microphone - unfortunately, I have to say that I didn´t go on the trip so have no idea what it was like...after a "timely" commercial break the microphone seems to be permanently placed in front of me and the subject randomly turns to European football.

"So Amil, like all people from England, i´m guessing you´re a Manchester United fan."

"Ummm. Not exactly but I hear that they are doing very well at the moment and won today in the Champions League".

We continue with a bit of football chat, talk about how long I´ve been in Xela and learning Spanish etc. to cover the remaining minutes of the interview. The interviewer then asks me to pronounce the names of all of us as Spanish speakers sometimes struggle with the pronunciation of non-Spanish names. After all the build up, I manage to screw up when we come to Steve´s surname.

The show continues after we exit the interview booth and I´d say that the success of the interview was a little mixed. I´m standing around minding my own business afterwards when I hear a tap on the window. They want me to go back in to give my thoughts on the Champions League results of that day. After giving my thoughts on a bunch of games that I hadn´t actually seen the guy suggests that I should come back on Monday to give my opinions on the European football results of the weekend. A kind of, European football pundit if you will. Unfortunately, I kindly have to decline the offer as I´ll be leaving Xela in 2 wks and it doesn´t make sense to let down all the fans that I´m likely to accumulate in 2 wks...

100% Explorador - Uncovering The Laguna Brava and other treasures near the Mexican border

amil_patel — Sun, 8 Mar 2009 22:18:00 GMT

Following the Extreme Adventure to the crater of Volcan Santiaguito, I spent last week exploring the "virgin territory" (as Don Eduardo likes to call it) of Guatemala that is near the Mexican border in Huehuetenango. Don Eduardo (owner of Kaqchikel tours), who I´ve come to know through our mutual friend Marvin, is trying to uncover new places to take tourists on treks and has heard that this "virgin territory" is extremely beautiful but hard to get to. Don Eduardo kindly invited me to go with him and his guides to explore the area a bit for a few days as they try to find new places to visit. Afterwards, I spent a few days staying with Marvin who is living in Huehue for a few months to re-open his mum´s petrol station.

Monday 2nd March

I turn up at Don Eduardo`s house a 4.50am with slightly aching limbs following my escapades at Santiaguito the days before. I ask Don Eduardo where the other four people are and get the following response - "Amil, you´ve been here nearly four months and you still haven´t got used to the hora Chapin (Guatemalan time)".

We leave at 5.50am once everyone has bothered to turn up. We are six in all - Don Eduardo, 4 of his guides and me. It takes 4 hrs to get to the gas station where we are going to meet Marvin. He´s the only one who knows the area - as far as Don Eduardo and his guides are concerned we may as well be in Kalahari desert.

Marvin tells us that there is a place called the Hoyo Simarron nearby. It is essentially a big, circular hole in the ground which is between 300 and 500m deep (I´m not that good at judgint distances). At the bottom of it is a forest with a mini-lake. It is a fairly impressive and scary site. This being Guatemala and "virgin territory" there is no kind of fence that prevents people from falling into the hole if they slip too close to the edge. Saul seems particulary scared and runs away from the edge as soon as he looks down into the cenote. We spend some time clowing around near the edge of the hole and drop rocks into it. It seems to take the best part of 30 secs for any rocks that we drop to reach the bottom.

Marvin informs us that he reckons the place that we need to explore a bit is the Laguna Brava. He describes it as a combination of "Lake Atitlan and Semuc Champey before tourism arrived there". We go to a small village which is the starting point of any trip to the Laguna Brava. We are told that we need to take a guide with us and are not allowed to take photos of the Laguna. Some elder in the village tells us that "some Gringo claims he owns the Laguna and would be very annoyed he found out that people were going there". Don Eduardo tells him that we wouldn´t dream of doing anything so disrespectful as we want to take groups of tourists to the Laguna to appreciate its beauty. We are told that we should go on horseback as it is a "difficult hike for 3 hrs through a bunch of mud" and your guide will be going on a horse". Don Eduardo replies that we are "experts and guides" so we won´t be needing the horses. The crowd gathering around us give us the "don´t tell us that we didn´t warn you look". We are all set to go but I somewhat disconcerted when I see our guide swigging away at some cheap looking Mexican guaro and his drunk friend collapsing on the ground.

We set off and the people from the village aren´t too wrong. It is very muddy and slippery - we slide all over the place as we begin the descent to the Laguna. Saul falls over onto a rock and gets a deep cut. David is next to lose his pride as he falls over in the middle of wishing good day to some locals in a house we pass.

About an hr into the hike, Don Eduardo gives Saul, David and Me our mission. "Guys, run ahead through this mud and take a bunch of photos of the Laguna and the surrounding countryside. The rest of us will keep the guide and his horse detained by going at a normal pace." Oh great. Not only is it completely slippery and muddy but now I´ve got to run to down to the Laguna Brava to take photos. We set off running and discover that we actually fall over less when we take less care over where we are going. What is supposed to be a three hour hike takes us just under two hours. The Laguna Brava and the rivers around it are incredible. The laguna itself is a combination of blue and turquoises surrounded by verdant hills. There are small waterfalls in the rivers around the Laguna the water is so fresh you can drink it. David, Saul and I dutifully and sneakily take all the photos we can before the rest arrive. When Eduardo arrives I´m surprised to hear him ask me to take his photo...

Amil: "Ummm, I thought we weren´t allowed to take photos Don Eduardo."

Don Eduardo: "Don´t worry. The guide said that we can take all the photos we want for 20Q. This is Guatemala." Doh. I forgot. Todo es posible en Guatemala.

We set up camp and decide it is time for a swim in the lake. We ask our guide if there are crocodiles etc. in the lake but he assures us that they were all killed a few years back. Only David, Marvin (another of the guides) and I are brave enough to venture into the freezing water.

At 6pm we begin to make dinner preparations. Dinner is a churasco with lots of tortillas, guacamole etc. I now realise why our rucksacks were so heavy. When Don Eduardo and his guides go camping they don´t scimp on the food. The brought 3kg of tortillas, 3/4lb meat for each person and much more. I ask Don Eduardo why we didn´t take any of these luxuries to Santiaguito. He tells me that luxuries are only for when the guides go on expeditions - "the pasta and mush is for gringos". Nice to know that I´m part of the inner circle.

The evening is spent listening to scare stories from our guide and ghost stories from Eduardo. Apparently, there are Jaguars and snakes around the Laguna. There is absoultely nobody around the Laguna - just us and nature. At around 10pm David needs the toilet but is too scared to venture off on his own. Everyone decides that strenght lies in the group so we decide that a "group toilet trip is in order". Time for bed. I start to hear some very strange sounds near to me in the middle of the night. After a bit of worrying, I figure it is only Saul snoring.

Tuesday 3rd March

After an early morning stroll to capture the various shades of blue that make up the lake, Saul and I prepare breakfast. It consists of a wad of tortillas (3kg is a lot to get through in a day) and egges. Everyone seems to stare at us we take out breakfast. We are many tortillas short. I discover that the Guatemalan equivalent of "who ate all the pies" is "who ate all the tortillas". I´m relieved to discover that everyone is blaming Saul. It appears he ate half of them while warming them up. Don Eduardo tells us that the next time we come to the Laguna Brava we need to bring kayaks so we can reach the other half of it - the path stops half way around the lake and he doesn´t really fancy bumping into stray Jaguars in the woods.

We pack up camp and decide that any adventure of Kaqchiquel isn´t really complete without a challenge. We have a race back up to the village. It usually takes 3 hrs to get back up the muddy, steep hills. Saul and I manage it in 90mins. Marvin turns up to pick us up just as we reach the village. Apparently, Marvin´s wife has banned him from drinking so this is an opportune moment to have a few beers while we await the rest. The rest turn up 30 mins later and David doesn´t turn up at all. It appears he´s gone to the wrong place so we have to go and find him.

On the way back we stop off at a large rock in the middle of nowhere, which is apparently quite famous. We all try to climb to the top of it. Only Marvin and I reach the top and start to goad Don Eduardo and his guides that only the guides from the "Escuela Utatlan" can reach the most difficult places. The smiles are soon wiped off our faces when we have no idea how we are going to climb back down. I´m about to suggest that we call the British Embassy to send a helicopter when I find a route which is probably doable. Marvin and I make it back down without too much drama.

We return back to Marvin´s gas station. I say goodbye to Don Eduardo and the guides as I´m going to be staying with Marvin for a few more days. The rest of the week is spent with Marvin on the gas station and doing barbecues in the evenings by the Rio Azul. It is basically a river with sky blue water due to the minerals that flow underneath it. The rest of the week passes by rather uneventfully but is pleasent nonetheless. However, as Don Eduardo says, "with Kaqchikel tours there are only adventures and extreme adventures"...

Extreme Adventure (or madness) - going to the crater of Volcan Santiaguito

amil_patel — Sun, 1 Mar 2009 23:32:00 GMT

Having just gone to the crater of one of the 10 most active volcanoes in the world I think I can fairly confidently say that it is unlikely that I´ll ever undertake such an amazing and frankly mad adventure again. If you happen to be my mum, I´d probably advise you not to read the remainder of this journal entry. If you happen to be someone thinking about going to the crater of Santiaguito and you are a very strong hiker, slightly mad and have a fair bit of intrepid spirit I´d recommend it - you´ll never have such an incredible experience and it´s unlikely that it´d be legal to do it in many countries with volcanos like Santiaguito.

Over the past 36 hrs I have: a)camped barely 400m away from the volcano without a tent and watched it spit out red hot rocks when erupting (although this bit was actually pretty safe due to the way the volcano erupts) b) watched a super-active volcano erupt from about 200m away (once again fairly safe due to the direction of the wind) c) waited for an eruption and then legged it up the cone to the actual crater in 100km/hr winds and stared into it (not so safe - in fact, as we ran up the cone of the volcano, apart from our guide, we were all wondering how the hell we were going to get back down without falling to our deaths) d) walked through what can only be described as the nearest thing to moon´s landscape without actually going there

The basic story goes something like this...I´ve been dying to go to the crater of Santiaguito for some time but for various reasons (largely promises to take students on various activities) I´ve been unable to do so. Don Eduardo who owns the only hiking group that goes to the actual crater of the volcano came to the school to tell me that they were taking 3 other people this weekend and it would be a good opportunity to go as they seemed like 3 strong hikers. Mario kindly offered to release me from my obligation to take the students to Volcan Santa Maria (thanks here to Don Eduardo for providing them with an alternative guide). So all was set for the two day trip to the crater of one of the most active volcanos in the world. As Don Eduardo says, "a trip to Santiaguito is an extreme adventure. We take about 100 people are year there but only 20 or so actually make it." He actually forbids his guides from taking people right to the crater (although they ignore him) as it is apparently too dangerous.

Saturday 7am

We start the walk to the crater. This involves dropping down about 1.5km from 3000m to 1500m where the first of Santiaguito`s "five beaches" are (a beach is basically a lunar like landscape formed from the volcanic ash and rocks that the volcanoe has thrown out - check out the 2 photo galleries from the trip - thanks to Steve here for sending me some of his photos). This bit is relatively straightforward although I spend some of time thinking of the immense pain that I´m likely to suffer coming back up what is essentially like walking down a kid´s slide for 2hrs.

The first beach is actually formed of rocks rather than volcanic ash. We stare up the climb to reach the second beach and it looks a fairly intimidating 1hr scramble up a bunch of volcanic rocks. It´s not as hard as it looks if you´re a decent hiker but does require a rest when you get to the 2nd beach. The prospect of killing yourself by losing your footing and falling onto jagged rocks isn´t actually that great at this point.

We lunch at the second beach and the scene becomes more lunar like as the clouds descend. This is exactly how I imagine what the moon is like - we contemplate how cool a moon themed party would be on an active volcano and decide we could make a lot of money from it - the only problem would be getting people to the venue. From the second to fourth beach it isn´t very hard at all as we walk through some pretty surreal landscapes in the the descending clouds. A lot of groups apparently stop at the first or second beach as they can`t cope with trek, or maybe they actually have the brains to think about the prospect of how difficult/dangerous the return will be.

From the fourth to the fifth beach is the bit that does mildly worry me. When climbing up to the fifth beach the realisation sets in that if I lose my balance there is probably a 100% chance that I´m going to die as I look down into the general emptiness below. I guess that is why it is called "extreme adventure".

We set up camp at the fifth beach - "camp" is obviously a somewhat generous term to describe our base. It consists of a washing line with a sheet of nylon over the top to prevent our food getting caked with volcanic ash, 2 nylon sheets with a bunch of sleeping bags on top with front row seets to the volcanic eruption and a small tent which is completely useless for anything. Our guide tells us not to go beyond a certain point as we are likely to fall to our deaths given the drop is a few hundred metres into the exact place where the volcano emits fairly large red hot rocks.

We get lucky with the sequence of events at 4pm. The clouds clear and the volcano erupts. It is an incredible sight and the sounds are pretty amazing too (sounds like a mixture of popcorn popping, ceramics crashing into eachother and a kettle boiling over-vigoroulsy*1000). I shoot a film of the eruption from about 400m (if you want to see it, send me an email and I´ll send it to you).

Everything seems to be going perfectly when at around 5pm it starts to rain. Apparently, the heat from the volcano creates steam etc. which creates rain mixed with volcanic ash. At this point we realise that we are completely screwed as all we have is a couple of nylone sheets on washing line to protect us - "extreme adventure" in every sense of the phrase. We reinforce the single nylon sheet on the washing line with the ones that we are going to sleep on and huddle under them waiting for the rain to pass. This is a most uncomfortable experience due to the jagged rocks under us and the fact that the nylon sheets appear to have holes in them. Luckily, all of us take this complete debacle in the right spirit and turn it into a humorous epsiode (which it obviously is if you forget that we are completely freezing and wet without the prospect of drying off under a piece nylon right next to one of the most active volcanos in the world which is providing us with ash-rain).

Our confidence in our guides prognostic abilities is beginning to wain a little as his prediction that it is "a passing shower" seems somewhat misplaced when it is still raining an hour later. From saying it is "certain" that it will clear Saul now says that there is "hope" that it will clear. An hour later and it is still raining and we are getting wetter. Now our guide says that "maybe, if we are lucky" it will clear. Suddenly, at 7pm his prediction comes true. The clouds clear, the moon and the stars in all their full glory shine down on us.

The only problem is that our sleeping bags are completely soaked and it is suddenly very cold. Time for a few swigs of rum to relieve the pain we are about to suffer. The night is more painful than we can possibly contemplate in advance. Shivering is the only way to keep warm but if you want to be an extreme adventurer, suffering is all part of the experience. I spend the night listening to the volcano erupting, other people shivering, trying various methods to warm up my feet and looking at my watch every 20 mins.

Sunday 5.15am

Time to get up and get within striking distance of the crater. We`re all freezing and it is good to get moving again. We get to a safe point (well, according to Saul anyway - it doesn´t look all that safe to me if the wind direction changes and there is an eruption) and warm ourselves with the steam that some of the rocks are emiting. We wait for an eruption. At 6.10 the volcano erupts just as the sun is starting to come up. My camera stops working due to the extreme conditions. The wind is horrendous - I´ve never experienced anything like it. The eruption finishes. At this point, Saul informs me that the wind isn`t blowing in the right direction so we might not be able to reach the crater. Oh, wait a minute, it´s changed direction. I turn around to see Saul hurtling towards the crater in the 100km/hr winds. I guess that means it is time to go...

We leg it down to the bottom of the valley where the cone of the volcano begins. We run as fast as we can up the cone of the volcano. This is truly extreme adventuring as all of us at various points are nearly blown off the edge of the cone as we scramble up. There are tiny volcanic particles being blown into our faces by the 100km/hr wind. Ouch, it seriously hurts. We get to the top. Calidad. All the pain is worth as we look down into the crater and see the steam coming out. Time to take photos quick and get the hell out of there before it erupts again. Volcan Santa Maria is in the background as the sun is rising and it is truly an awe inspiring sight. We spend 15mins at the crater before the realisation sets in that we have to go back down in the wind.

Going down is a truly terrifying experience at various points we think we might be blown away into the abyss. The wind is actually helping at this point as it is blowing us back into the surface of the side of the cone helping us keep pasted to the side of the cone rather than sliding down off it. Once near safety, our guide tells us that only once before has he been to the crater in such wind. However, we´re a strong group...

We reach safety. Mush for breakfast, except our guide has forgotten the sugar. It is rank, but all part of the extreme experience. We pack up our pitiful excuse for a camp and start to climb down. We´re all on a high and everyone agrees it is probably the most exciting, mad and amazing thing that they have done. We´re obviously not safe yet, as what comes up has to go down. We take a lot of care going down from the 5th to the 4th beach as if you slip or lose balance you´re dead. The rest of the trek down to 1st beach is relatively straightforward after the madness of what has gone before. At the first beach we realise that we now have to climb 1.5km up the "slides" in the heat to get to final safety. We manage it in a few hours. It is fairly tough but with a bit of mental fortitude we overcome the pain. We get back to Xela at 3pm fairly self satisfied. I go to the school to tell Mario about the adventure - he tells me it´ll probably be a week before the smile gets wiped off my face. He says he´ll start training so that he might be fit enough to reach the crater in a year.

In all seriousness, this trek has probably been the most exciting and rewarding that I´ve ever done. I doubt I will every doing anything quite so extreme for the rest of my life and while it sounds very dangerous (and actually is in some sections...) we were going with an expert who knows a lot about the volcano and how it erupts/ where it is safe (well, I have to say that don´t I). It is hugely satisfying doing something that very few people manage each year even though we did all have to admit that we are completely mad afterwards. Photos are up and I´d recommend you take a look of them - if some of them look dangerous, it is because what we did was pretty dangerous...

p.s. If you are still reading mum, I did tell you to stop after the first paragraph.

p.s. the good news is that I´m going to spend the next few days going with Don Eduardo and some of his guides to find a new route near the Mexican border. Marvin is there at the moment and he knows the area pretty well - apparently, there are fresh water lakes from which you can drink the water. It should be another adventure, although somewhat less dramatic.

Celebrating my birthday Guatemalan style

amil_patel — Fri, 20 Feb 2009 21:21:00 GMT

I thought I should write a little entry about how I spent my birthday here in Xela (Guatemala). Guatemalans seem to celebrate birthdays with more "rigour" than I typically would in England. My birthday party seemed to last 3 days - not that I was complaining...

Feb 13th

Even though it isn´t my birthday until the 15th, my mate Mario and I decide that it is appropriate to have a chuparassco (barbecue & drinks) in the afternoon. We budget for 1/2 pound of meat for each person. We each put together our invitee lists and in the end 24 people turn up which is more than we were expecting. We begin to worry that the bottle of Ron Zacapa (the best rum in the world, or so we reckon) won´t last very long with all these people. Our fears are quickly founded as the bottle of Zacapa lasts only 20mins once everyone has had a trago. Particularly gaulling for the conoseurs of Zacapa present is the person who mixes some coke with the Zacapa. Comments range from "how can you treat one of the seven wonders of the world with such disdain" to "she´ll have to go to church tomorrow to confess her sins".

After the obligatory happy birthday song (which I obviously detest but pretend to be grateful for) we settle down to eat the fruits of our labour. Mario dutifully eats the "zacates" (weeds) aka salad that Hannah has prepared and to everyone´s surprise goes for seconds.

Following a few seconds of pondering after lunch we decide it would imprudent not to invest in a second bottle of Ron Zacapa and a gordito of Barcelo. We ask for a contribution from the other invitees to make up the remainder of the 300Q to buy another bottle of Zacapa. Luckily some of the guests start to leave around 5pm which allows Mario, Billy and me to drink most of the second Zacapa. The merriment continues until the early hours of the next morning (I think) as according to Dona Esperanza she heard someone entering the house at around 2am.

Feb 14th

I need to get up at 7am to take the students to the students at the Spanish school on a hike to the Laguna Chicabal. This is obviously the last thing I need with my hangover but I dutifully fulfil my duty of hiking up to a lake at 2900m. I´m obviously not in the best of moods and am less than amused with the Korean guy who is constantly asking me "what´s the word for this, that and other in Spanish".

We return from the hike at around 3pm in the afternoon and I got back home to sleep for a few hours. I need to get up for 8pm as Juan and Mario are playing a gig in a bar in another part of town. I beg them not to play a rendition of happy birthday and restrict myself to a few beers for the evening. The concert is a disaster as Juan forgets a song halfway through and they have to abandon. Everyone seems to be looking at me as if I´m somehow responsible for the shambles.

Feb 15th

Well, it is actually my birthday today and Dona Esperanza prepares a nice lunch. There are 7 of us present for the lunch and Don Alvaro opens one of his better bottles of whisky. I´m not exactly sure why Dona Espe seems to be refilling my glass so regularly - anybody would think she doesn´t want her husband to get drunk. After we polish off the first bottle it is apparent that Don Alvaro is intent on continuing the fiesta. He suggests that we go licor store to buy a couple of bottles of rum. Dona Espe instructs Billy to go with him instead of me - she mutters something about "if these two cabrones go they´ll go to some Cantina and won´t come back".

Upon returning with the guaro, Don Alvaro gets out the guitar and starts sining old Guatemalan folk songs. Everyone comments that I´m a bit quieter than normal. I tell them it probably has something to do with the fact that I don´t know the words to the songs so it is a bit hard to join in...

The festivities are brought to a close at 10pm when Don Alvaro manages to break both the sugar and salt containers while attempting to get up from the table. Dona Espe unilterally decides that the party has probably gone on for long enough and for the good of her house it is probably better that everyone retires to their rooms.

Lake Atitlan (probably the most beautiful lake in the world)

amil_patel — Wed, 18 Feb 2009 20:53:00 GMT

About two weeks ago I made a trip to Lake Atitlan for the weekend as a friend of mine, Don Alvaro, knows someone who owns a hospedaje there. I´ve been to the lake before but have never been to San Juan before - it´s one of the twelve villages on the lake and doesn´t really have any tourists.

I`ve been pretty busy over the last few weeks with my job as a guide for the school and general socialising so it was a good opportunity to spend a few days kicking back from the world, eating fresh fish from the lake and reading a bit of my book (I´m currently reading the Alquimist in Spanish).

After catching a bus to Panachael I caught a Lancha to San Juan. The guys on the boat seemed mildly surprised when I didn´t get out in San Pedro (where tourists generally go) and asked to be dropped off at San Juan. Upon docking in San Juan I took a tuk-tuk to the hospedaje. San Juan itself isn´t really anything to write home about but my room at the hospedaje had a great view overlooking the lake. I spent the morning relaxing in a hammock on the roof of the hospedaje and reading my book.

The afternoon was spent doing a walk around the shore of the lake from San Juan to San Marcos. According to Lonely Planet, it is "apparently" dangerous to walk around the edge of the lake between San Juan and San Marcos but I´ve done it a couple of times and nothing has ever happened to me. The great thing about walking around the lake is that the colour of the water changes depending on where you are and you also walk through coffee and fruit plantations. The lake is really at its most picturesque between San Juan and San Marcos, with three volcanoes surrounding the lake appearing on the background as you head towards San Marcos. Nearer San Marcos I saw Santiaguito erupting in the background which was quite cool (have a look at the photo album "Lake Atitlan" to see the photo). Upon arriving at San Marcos I needed a swim the lake to cool off - San Marcos is one of the few places around the lake where it is easy to dive into the lake and take a swim. After three hours of walking I decided it was probably more prudent to take a tuk-tuk back to San Juan.

The evening was spent eating a nice caldo de mariscos, talking to Don Alvaro´s mate (who apparently owns a radio station in Xela which i´ve never heard of) and polishing off a litre of Gallo.

I´ve decided that Lake Atitlan is probably my favourite place in the world - a huge lake formed in the cone of a volcano that imploded, surrounded by three towering volcanos and verdent scenery. If you get the chance, go there...